#2
The chorus is just so damn happy, I love it.
Some note choices sounded a bit suspect early on, over all it was really good though.
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Colossus
#3
First of all, thanks for critting my song. Now for my crit:
The intro was nice and built up well. I thought the bending on the 3rd fret was a bit weird. I don't think vibraphones CAN bend notes. The chorus is really atmospheric and as frankibo said, "happy". Then you have the little "7/4" section which I thought was a nice bridge between the two choruses. The second chorus was really cool and I liked how you kept building on top of it. The outro was okay, but I think you could do something that's maybe a bit different from the intro. It would give the song some more variety.
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#4
This was really good, especially considering you didn't have access to instruments! It feels very upbeat, but in a sort of Piglet way, which I love. the 7/8 was, as synester said, a good bridge, maybe a little drawn out but not to a really noticeable way, just to my pedantic way. Overall a real nice song, great for what it was, for the genre I mean, I enjoyed it!
#5
I wasn't a fan of that bend from the A# in the intro, why not try to bend the A up a full step? The delayed guitar sounds were awesome. The chorus was great both times around, I agree, they were really happy sounding, and the ensemble part at the end was awesome. Ending was okay, but I still didn't like that bend too much. Good job overall.
#6
The intro sounded a bit weak to me, but once everything settled and the song starting moving, then DAMN! The chorus is amazingly soothing and works just as well instrumentally as I can predict that it does with vocals added. Hell, I'd keep it instrumental if I were you

The part after the second chorus, with the strings, is cheesy as hell but since when have cheese been a bad thing? Amazingly thorough composition in general. And regarding the bend in the intro, it really got me the first time, in a good way! I would make it reach the B a bit faster though.

And this might not be your genre really, but I just posted a metal album here, with ten songs. I would love if you could just crit one or two of them. Cheers!

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1467949
Last edited by GU5T4V at Aug 5, 2011,
#7
Quote by Mean Mr Mustard
I wasn't a fan of that bend from the A# in the intro, why not try to bend the A up a full step? The delayed guitar sounds were awesome. The chorus was great both times around, I agree, they were really happy sounding, and the ensemble part at the end was awesome. Ending was okay, but I still didn't like that bend too much. Good job overall.

Just wanna say I love your avatar.
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#8
Thanks for the kind comments everyone, I'm working on another outro atm.
I will post the updated version as well when it's done.

I do find it odd that the bended A# didn't appeal to most of you, I thought it was a cool way to kind of mix it up, but not too much.

I will get to critting back soon, likely tomorrow as I don't have the time right now.
#9
Quote by intothe
Thanks for the kind comments everyone, I'm working on another outro atm.
I will post the updated version as well when it's done.

I do find it odd that the bended A# didn't appeal to most of you, I thought it was a cool way to kind of mix it up, but not too much.

I will get to critting back soon, likely tomorrow as I don't have the time right now.


Keep the bend for crisps sake! The accidental that it bends up from gives the otherwise quite generic melody some needed personality - as I said, just make it get to the B a tad bit faster, as I found it lingering too long at the A# (I'm talking about a split millisecond or something, so if you don't wanna, it's cool )
#10
Sincerely, I suck at critting people's songs. But man, you've got some solid piece of work right here. I loved the whole feeling of the song, as someone said above, it's happy, it's soothing. I honestly was paying lots of attention to the drums, due to the fact that I'm more a drummer than a guitarist. Loved the whole drumline, man. Great, great fills. You did a great job with the delay guitars, too. It sound brilliant.

Overall; man, this is damn awesome. Keep it up. If there's anything I can point out, is that you could really add some nice outro. That's about everything I can say. Sorry if it wasn't too useful, but I really loved your song. Congratulations, buddy.
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UG's MEXICAN DRUMMER
#11
You listen to Angels and Airwaves at all? This sounded like a much more ambient version of what they do, especially with the delayed clean guitars. I personally loved the whole thing. I think I get what you were going for with the A# bend, but it needs to bend up faster- it sounds very odd before it gets there.

I loved the hi-hat work throughout, I love the clean guitars- I'm a sucker for that sound. I can't find anything to complain about.

C4C? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1468576