If you woke up tomorrow and somehow had become a pedophile, what would you do?

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#1
ie. You now have a sexual attraction pretty much exclusively to pre pubescent children. I don't think you would be able to 'cure' it much like you can't cure being gay but you can't exactly embrace it the same way you could being gay. I honestly don't know what I would do in that situation, I'd probably end up killing myself.

Thread doesn't apply to Woffelz for obvious reasons.
I'mCool

Quote by StewieSwan
Don't you have some tourists to beat up?

Quote by Zoot Allures
Nah he's too busy feeling like a big man hitting women he knows to 'put them in their place'.
#3
neuter myself before i get horny and do something really weird.
"I specialize in driving a set like I'm driving a Lexus" - Uncle Mez
#6
Quote by due 07
I would just do my best to not rape kids.


Well obviously that's the goal but it wouldn't be nice to have to repress your attraction all the time and if anyone finds out you'll probably lose their friendship.
I'mCool

Quote by StewieSwan
Don't you have some tourists to beat up?

Quote by Zoot Allures
Nah he's too busy feeling like a big man hitting women he knows to 'put them in their place'.
#7
I'd post a thread detailing my situation as if it were hypothetical.
i don't know why i feel so dry
#8
I could probably get through life fine, but I imagine it'd be really annoying. I could definitely restrain myself perfectly well, though.
#9
*reported*
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wy is yer mad at muy gramhar fer?


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jimmybanks youre a genius.


aparently i ar smrt?
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jimmybanks youre a genius


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#12
Quote by cornmancer
Watch some lesbian porn to remind myself how great tits are


I like the way you think
I'mCool

Quote by StewieSwan
Don't you have some tourists to beat up?

Quote by Zoot Allures
Nah he's too busy feeling like a big man hitting women he knows to 'put them in their place'.
#14
Quote by Spartan101400
-Awaits Woffelz to enter the thread to punish Pedophiles-


He's an obvious pedo brah
I'mCool

Quote by StewieSwan
Don't you have some tourists to beat up?

Quote by Zoot Allures
Nah he's too busy feeling like a big man hitting women he knows to 'put them in their place'.
#15
Quote by ChamsRock
I could probably get through life fine, but I imagine it'd be really annoying. I could definitely restrain myself perfectly well, though.


Nah if I was into something weird it would probably be beastality. I'm not actually into that but if I was stuck in a room with an another mammal for a long time...
I'mCool

Quote by StewieSwan
Don't you have some tourists to beat up?

Quote by Zoot Allures
Nah he's too busy feeling like a big man hitting women he knows to 'put them in their place'.
#18
Quote by Eric_Fail
Nah if I was into something weird it would probably be beastality. I'm not actually into that but if I was stuck in a room with an another mammal for a long time...


we've all been there, man

was it a cat with you?
"I specialize in driving a set like I'm driving a Lexus" - Uncle Mez
#20
Quote by Eastwinn
I'd post a thread detailing my situation as if it were hypothetical.


Quote by JimmyBanks6
*reported*
Why?

Quote by Eric_Fail
Well obviously that's the goal but it wouldn't be nice to have to repress your attraction all the time and if anyone finds out you'll probably lose their friendship.
True. I'd probably take measures to reduce my hormones.
#21
I would get a wife.


Then I would rape my children.
DO YOU LIEK ME???

cause i dont like you


Quote by Floods_Solo
Lol. If insomniac's were called something less cool like "cock lords" or something I bet there would be significantly less people claiming to be it.
#22
well, under certain state laws, you can become a pedophile for public urination. and i don't mean like in front of people. i mean like having to take a drunken piss at 3 AM between two buildings and a cop happens to see you
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#23
I would tell that damn kid to get out of my bed. Bitch, this was a one night stand, nothin' else
Quote by ErikLensherr
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VOTE
Thrustor: 2012
#25
Nothing has changed.

[img]http://i.imgur.com/LYZyCdp.gif[/img]


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#26
Quote by jakesmellspoo
well, under certain state laws, you can become a pedophile for public urination. and i don't mean like in front of people. i mean like having to take a drunken piss at 3 AM between two buildings and a cop happens to see you


That's a sex offender. And you're only like level 1 if the cop decides that you should be charged for it.

You'd be a pedo if you pissed on a kid at 3 AM in an alley and a cop catches you.
Quote by ErikLensherr
Don't belittle it like that, your mom produces top quality stuff.



C4C
[thread="1339859"]Hammerhead[/thread]
[thread="1341152"]Anglerfish[/thread]

VOTE
Thrustor: 2012
#27
I would probably masturbate to the idea of being with a child, but I wouldn't do anything to one. Kind of like how I jerk off to females and I get by fine even though I've never had sex with one.


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I put a ton of my capital into SW Airlines... The next day, THE NEXT DAY these nutters fly into the WTC. What the hell? Apparently no one wanted to fly anymore, and I was like "What gives? God damnit Osama, let me win a fuggin' game!"
#29
I'd kick over some bikes and then get kicked out of water parks
Whether I am a hungry rabbit or a frightened carrot, my home is the same.
#30
I completely expected this to be a Wofflez thread...
I pride myself on my humility.
#31
Quote by VillainousLatin
inb4 the FBI shows up


off topic here but are you really from Puerto Rico?
I'mCool

Quote by StewieSwan
Don't you have some tourists to beat up?

Quote by Zoot Allures
Nah he's too busy feeling like a big man hitting women he knows to 'put them in their place'.
#32
Quote by vicarious46
That's a sex offender. And you're only like level 1 if the cop decides that you should be charged for it.

You'd be a pedo if you pissed on a kid at 3 AM in an alley and a cop catches you.

i know the difference and you know what i meant.

also, cops are dickheads and i wouldn't put it past some of them to charge someone with an unnecessary sex offense
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#33
Quote by mtshark
I completely expected this to be a Wofflez thread...


I got the idea from someone a book I was reading today about a person who woke up one day in the 60s and began to feel like they were transgender, which at the time they probably would have been considered just as bad pedos are today. And yes Woffelz also popped into my head too.
I'mCool

Quote by StewieSwan
Don't you have some tourists to beat up?

Quote by Zoot Allures
Nah he's too busy feeling like a big man hitting women he knows to 'put them in their place'.
#35
Quote by VillainousLatin
Yes....why O_O you gonna stalk me?


not that I would mind


i believe he has a tough case of puertoricophilia.

he gets big boners just from talking to you, man.
"I specialize in driving a set like I'm driving a Lexus" - Uncle Mez
#36
Quote by laid-to-waste
i believe he has a tough case of puertoricophilia.

he gets big boners just from talking to you, man.

oh,pheeeww I though he was gonna light a lower case "T" on fire in front of my house and then kick my bike
Last edited by VillainousLatin at Aug 1, 2011,
#37
Quote by Eric_Fail
He's an obvious pedo brah


Didn't you hear? His parents were killed by a Pedo in an alley and now he roams the night exacting his vengeance upon all those who walk the path of the Bear.
#39
Quote by Spartan101400
Didn't you hear? His parents were killed by a Pedo in an alley and now he roams the night exacting his vengeance upon all those who walk the path of the Bear.

By infiltrating them through posing as one himself?

Sounds sketchy brah.
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