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#1
It just seems unavoidable: in clubs, work or even at the bus stop. I'm awful at making small talk, talk to me about something like sport, music, the news etc and I'll talk for hours, but I'm awful at talking shite to someone to fill that awkward silence that we all hate.


So who else hates small talk? Do you try and avoid it, or do you like it?
#2
Hello.
To be vulnerable is needed most of all, if you intend to truly fall apart.


Quote by due 07
You have no idea how much I don't want to tell stories about my mother's vaginal slime on the internet.


I make music sometimes.
#5
i usually turn small talk into big talk.

'how's your day been?'

'*extremely deep answer, followed by meaningful reciprocal request*'
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#8
Quote by Duffman123
Good weather, innit?


I'm bored already

How 'bout that corn?
To be vulnerable is needed most of all, if you intend to truly fall apart.


Quote by due 07
You have no idea how much I don't want to tell stories about my mother's vaginal slime on the internet.


I make music sometimes.
#11
I'm good at thinking of things to say, but since small talk is usually for strangers/acquaintances and I get really nervous around people I don't know well, I can barely get a word out. I still do it though because each time I think I'll get better at it but I don't and then I hate myself for being awkward for 5 minutes when I could've easily avoided it.
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#12
Quote by Gorelord666
How 'bout that corn?

oh woah, corn? yeah corn. corn is good. yeah corn. corn there's always something new with corn
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#14
It is avoidable.
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#15
I'm Finnish. We don't do small talk. We just avoid eye contact and shut up.
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#16
^yep (to the guy above that guy)

"So how about that weather, huh?"

"OH you are SO deep! Wanna fuck?"
#17
I have my MP3 player ready for just such a purpose. Whenever it's not nessecary to make small talk, I put my earplugs in. Sometimes I don't even turn it on, but people will still assume it's on and refrain from talking.
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#19
Well, asking how the girl's (I suppose you have a penis and therefore rather wish to talk to girls) day was might seem very general at first, but if you listen to what she's saying, you can always find something on which you can build up a conversation.

And if you add making funny/not serious comments to even the dullest things, it's even better. For example:

Me: Hey, how was your day?

Girl: I worked/studied and sat in front of a computer all day.

Me: And how often do you distract yourself with facebook and browser-games?
or
Me: So you watched porn all day?


I will admit that I'm not very good at getting girls to date me, I haven't figured that one out yet, but I think I can do the first conversation part quite good.

And ALWAYS SMILE and KEEP EYE CONTACT. People tend to mimic each other.
Once you smile, the other person will probably smile and feel better too.
#20
it's something you become scarily good at when you work customer service.. to the point where you do it without even thinking like a robot.
does get kind of annoying when 10 people in a row just talk about weather though
#21
Quote by Duffman123
It just seems unavoidable: in clubs, work or even at the bus stop. I'm awful at making small talk, talk to me about something like sport, music, the news etc and I'll talk for hours, but I'm awful at talking shite to someone to fill that awkward silence that we all hate.


So who else hates small talk? Do you try and avoid it, or do you like it?


What you need is a clothes peg, fasten it to your clothing in a visible place and wait for someone to ask why you are wearing it, then say "It's a conversation piece" and explain that you struggle having a conversation and almost certainly a conversation will ensue.
#22
****ing small talk, how do they work?

Seriously though, i have no suggestions because i'm quiet and awkward with both small and big talk.
#23
Quote by Flibo
I'm Finnish. We don't do small talk. We just avoid eye contact and shut up.



So true
#24
I'm normally very shy, but after a few drinks I can do the small talk thing. I used to have about 10 numbers in my phone of people I met drunk one night and then forgot about the next day. It was like IRL Facebook.
#26
I prefer not to talk because I think it is funny how much some people find silence uncomfortable. If someone tries to talk to me I just give one word answers, or pause and then say, "Sorry, what was that? I wasn't paying attention."
#27
Quote by SlackerBabbath
What you need is a clothes peg, fasten it to your clothing in a visible place and wait for someone to ask why you are wearing it, then say "It's a conversation piece" and explain that you struggle having a conversation and almost certainly a conversation will ensue.

either that or you get a weird look and people walk away.

either way, crisis averted.
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#28
Quote by trashbeast
it's something you become scarily good at when you work customer service.. to the point where you do it without even thinking like a robot.
does get kind of annoying when 10 people in a row just talk about weather though


+1 I used to do this really well whilst I worked in a supermarket, but when I was off my shift I couldn't do it.
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#31
Quote by SlackerBabbath
What you need is a clothes peg, fasten it to your clothing in a visible place and wait for someone to ask why you are wearing it, then say "It's a conversation piece" and explain that you struggle having a conversation and almost certainly a conversation will ensue.

+1
And since most people agree, to some extent, that small talk is hard - talk about small talk and how hard it is. That'll help you build up a good personal relation. plus you'll appear funny and confident.
#33
Introduce yourself and maybe give them a compliment or make some remark about your environment (music at the club, something new at work, the weather) and if you get a positive response then:

a) Ask them questions about themselves. (Do they come here often? What do they like to do for fun? What kind of music do they listen to?)

b) Ask them questions about their opinions. (What do you think about *fill in blank*?)

c) Ask them questions about other people. (Family, friends, celebrities)

Nod, make some eye contact, throw in some "that's interesting, really, wow, etc", and share things you both have in common. People like other people who remind them of themselves.

Congratulations you've just made small talk.
#34
What I do if there is an awkward silence is take out my pipe(tobacco not weed) and take one puff and before you know it a conversation is taking place, usually about how cool I am.
I'mCool

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#35
You're asking people that are on an online forum for probably that same reason lol. What Godsmack has said is generally a good plan though. Also a drink or two oughta help you bullshit with people.
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#36
Quote by Bongmaster

This is better.

"Hi. What's your name? -It doesn't matter what your name is!"

DoomdEdit: Also, why do people think that the gaps between speech are "awkward" and need to be filled?
Quote by Butt Rayge
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I'm just a hedonist without happiness
Last edited by doomded at Aug 5, 2011,
#38
I'm Canadian, I always strike up conversations with strangers. Or just small talk. Helps the wait in a line or on the train go faster, plus it feels good to be friendly and nice. I don't exactly know how to explain how to do it though, it's just practice and how I was raised.
Last edited by Thrashtastic15 at Aug 5, 2011,
#40
Quote by Eric_Fail
What I do if there is an awkward silence is take out my pipe(tobacco not weed) and take one puff and before you know it a conversation is taking place, usually about how cool I am.
You wish that were true...

OT: It's simple. Just ask questions.
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