#2
The high vocals sound a bit off at times and the drums are really repetitive.
I feel like you should have a more "energetic" part towards the end to lift the song up, it sounds kinda dull otherwise.
#3
the parts with doubled vocal track seemed like you kind of were drifting from the key towards the beginning, but that's okay i don't mind that. You have a cool voice for this music, nice playing too. You kept a good mood throughout, but like he said I was expecting an energetic ending or something. Overall it's a legit song, be happy you made it
#4
crittin as i go. i like the piano, and the guitar comes in nicely, good quality so far. i like that the voice is panned. i like the lyrics so far, but the harmony vox are a bit off key. flows well from each part to the next. the bass line keeps everything going, i like it. the music/melody begins to get repetitive near the end, adding another piano or guitar line in the background will help to spruce it up a bit and keep interest. overall good, fun song to listen to, good job!

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#6
Like someone said, the harmonised vocal parts like the one at 0:59 sound off.
Your voice is nice and fits well, and the bass line and guitar sound really good. Very catchy.

Drums are repetitive, and you don't really hear cymbals much. Maybe add some ride / hi-hat in the mix? Possibly some drum rolls, between the different sections? But nothing fancy.
I feel like the song is slightly longer than it should, maybe because the "solo" section at 3:12 is not much different than the rest of the song.

May I ask how you got the bass sound? I really like it.
Last edited by Vitor_vdp at Aug 10, 2011,
#7
Your voice fits this style well, though, like the others have said, your vocals get off just a little at times. I would spice up the drums some, but props for adding them, I rarely even try with the drums. You have some catchy guitar riffs, maybe just spice that up some toward the end. Good overall, I would just try to increase the interest toward the end of the song
#9
I enjoyed the whole song but I feel like it keeps building and building to something huge but never really gets to that something huge. I think cymbals nearing the end of the song would really help that....also the guitar riff is really cool.
#10
thanks for the crit man ^^
like the melody alot, pretty good production as well, drums are a bit repetitive but the rest is good, vocals seem a bit off at times but mostly there good in key, you have a good clear voice as well.
good song overall man i like it, keep it up!
#11
Thanks for the crit

I'm not really a fan of the intro part with piano and drums, its a bit cheesy in my opinion, but its cool when the guitar comes in. I also think the harmonised vocals sound a little off at times. I like the music but I think it needs to either build more or change in some way, it gets a little repetitive after a while
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#12
I loved the guitar, but the voice / voices just doesn't cut it...
Good melody though...

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#13
Brutal eh? :P

As previously mentioned, the drums need more presence in the track - both in complexity and volume level. Jarring transition between the intro and the verse, and the sections with the lead guitar line and palm muted, may just be a volume issue. Your voice sounds good - when you're not trying to harmonise with yourself! Something to work on, I think its the higher one thats a bit off. You have a good tone though, and I like the song. It kind of
reminds me of "she don't use jelly" by The Flaming Lips
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#14
Nice song, I love your sound, especially bass sound and your voice fits to such music very well, but like inkybutt said it's building and building but never gets to that something huge. I think you should do something with it, I don't know make choruses more powerful or make something huge at the end, other then that it's really nice stuff. Keep up the good work.

Cheers
#15
Hey man, cool to get another crit from you. Now here is yours:

Simplistic intro that works BUT when the guitar comes in, there's too much of a contrast in tone between the drums/piano and the guitar. The guitar sounds too bright in comparison? Something to consider.

While you say you are moving away from folk stuff, I have to say, your voice is just suited to folk/folk-rock to be honest . The verses work well but the harmonies could maybe be touched up on, and the backing lowered a tad.

The rest of the track sounds fine (especially nearer the end where the harmonies sit much better than nearer the beginning) and it's overall a track that while I wouldn't find myself listening to, was done pretty well.

Good work, I'd like to see you go MORE folky though .
#16
I really liked this, especially the acoustic guitar part. The piano seems really simplistic, like something you'd get in a music box or something, which is really cool.

I agree about the backing vocals and how they need to come down a tad, and don't really fit in too well. But the main vocal melody is really nice. I think the simple drums work really well, like nothing more needs to be added.

Good job, and thanks for the comments on mine
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#17
I think the composition is well done.

I think the vocal production is obviously the biggest issue here. Many will say that the vocals need to be harmonized better, but I don't think that's necessarily the case. Sometimes having imperfections/weirdness in the vocals can be charming/interesting in the right context. I think the vocals need to be blended more into the mix. Maybe bring them down slightly in volume, add a touch of reverb, and soften them up slighty will some EQ.

I think the whole track would also benefit from some warmness. Maybe try running it through a analog simulater plugin for saturation and harmonics.

Overall I like it though. I would try recording with ribbon mics if I were you. Also, when you're finished with the track, investing in professional mastering will help take this to the next level IMO.

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#18
Hey man, thanks for the crit on my song.

Here we go.
Your lower voice sounds really good. But your drums are too low and your voice is too high, volume wise that is. When you first start harmonizing the higher vocals seemed way off key. Take another take at it, recording is about getting things perfect! If you level out the volumes though, everything will blend much better.

I really like the way you composed this though, the bass track in the back of the verses sounds really sweet. Along with the piano chords and vocals. The melody's are really good on the vocals! Just make sure you're in key

Keep it up man, work on mixing/mastering your tracks a bit more and they'll sound great!
#19
As many other have stated, your low voice fits the song great, although the higher harmonies is a little flat.
I enjoyed the vocal melody and the sound of the instruments. Except for the drums. They sound a bit too boring and 'midi'. Might be an artistic choice, but I would like some more Umpf in the drums.

Keep it up bro
#20
Hey man, thanks for your crit!

Critting as I listen

I'm not sure about the intro. The Piano sounds more like a toy, and the melody doesn't seem to fit to the beat. Kind of reminds me of a song for small children or something like that.

I really like the Acoustic-guitar, the tone is great, maybe a tad to boomy. Or maybe it's the bass underneath it, again, not to sure. I would try to either seperate the bass and the acoustic guitar or cut some bass frequenzies.

The voice sounds very dry and way too loud, it just doesn't fit into the mix. Try some reverb to make it sound less dry. I'm fine with the harmonics, though, they kind of fit, even if they're off-key.

The drums sound really boring. Would probably even sound better without them. Bring them up in the mix, add some cymbals and fills and it will sound way better.

The song also seems to drag on for ages. I guess it's because of the repetitiveness. Try to add some parts that bring some change into the song, like a solo, a break, a nice fill, something that takes the attention away from the standard riff.

Besides the drums and the voice the mix seemed fine to me.

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#21
First off, thanks for your crit on my song

Cool piano hook, and the guitar is pretty good. I agree with the aforementioned though, the drums need to be a bit more interesting (though not necessarily louder imo, they fit the song in terms of volume). The vocals themselves are fine, but a bit too loud and sound a bit off in the general mix, this is especially noticeable during the harmonies (a bit of reverb and eq wouldn't hurt here imo). Overall I think it's a bit too simplistic, which makes it kinda boring at some points, but it has potential, so keep working on it.
#22
Won't comment overly on mix since I'm in a poor listening environment.

Piano sound in the beginning is rather unimpressive, but moreso the writing is quite meandering, and the left-hand part somewhat pointless. A fuller harmony backing the melody, as well as a more driven melody with clear center of gravity would've been nice. It also set an almost parodic mood - I don't know if it's intended, but it doesn't come off as convincing.

The vocal harmony is off-key, and the panning weakens this place rather than strengthens it. Perhaps the levels are off.

Overall it almost feels like the shell of a song. There's some clean guitar droning on in the background but it just doesn't cut it. It could work nicely as say a rock song with some neat rhythm and lead riffage during verse, or even in a similar style, but right now it's just very plain. The drums are also extremely monotone, add in fills and maybe even some changes in style here and there. Double-timing could perhaps even make for a nice last chorus.

Structurewise it's very long and builds on more or less the same pattern. You should cut away some on the verses and break the pace with some
thing like a pre-chorus or re-intro (I think I recall a post-chorus somewhere in there).


The good:

It's pretty groovy in its places, and the vocals are well-written and in the darker solo passages, quite pleasant to listen to.
#23
It appears I am a little late to the party...but the harmony vocal is off. Which I am sure has been mentioned. I really like the bass pattern a lot. The drums sound a little fake. I would drop the vocals about 3dB at least. The Low Mids and Low frequencies maybe a bit busy.

I do really like the lyrics and think overall it is a good song. The voice is really nice (except for the high harmony, which is a good idea just not executed the best.)

Hope I helped.

Thanks for the crit by the way.
#24
i like the song its self, (critiquing while listening) and i like your vocal style, but the harmonies need to be worked on. what i find helps when i do harmonies, which is not often, to export the file as an mp3 then listen to it while you do the harmonies, it helps a lot, obviously i dont know what you do, but it helps getting them down. Other than than that the "wonderful" part sounds great. very folky i like it
#25
hey man,

i dig the intro and the acoustic riff is fantastic. however, the higher vocals really need some tuning up. also, if you're working with logic pro you can definitely fill out the sound a little more with the bass and drums, if you just fool around a bit. nice job
#26
First off, surprisingly good voice, very folkish sound. The harmonies are a bit off, but otherwise its pretty solid. The acoustic tone is nice, although I think it needs more stereo spread, its very centrally mixed.

I would like a full set of drums to come in and some point, just to give the song more energy and depth.

Vocals harmonies at the end are more in key than the beginning. Maybe do some higher vocal parts that aren't harmonies, so the verses have more variety in them, and an increase in tension.

Mix and levels are all very well, I think the song just needs some more energy, I think a full drum kit added into the mix would do that.
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#27
I like it the song as a whole, but I think your harmony vocals need some work. Either put them a little lower in the mix, maybe a little more reverb. I'm not sure exactly, but they sound out of place. I also enjoy your guitar tone on it.
#28
Hi,

I like it very much.

It has it's charme. I think the vocals being a bit loud fits the song just right, you sing quite well ! The only thing i don't like is the harmony..It's a little bit off..

But other than that it's just fine..


Keep up the good work !


Cheers,
#29
Good voice, well-recorded. In fact your voice would be perfect for one of my songs for which I wanted a Johnny Cash sound but was unable to achieve myself.

I didn't like the introduction and was expecting not to like the song but it improved dramatically. The trouble with the intro is that dry stacatto sound like a synthesised piano and guitar program. The lullaby-like intro on piano sounds a bit out of place.

I think the song would work better without the harmony vocals.

A slight increase in tempo at some point would hold one's attention better.

It's not bad but needs more obvious structural markings.
#30
The piano is really cool sounding. The acoustic guitar that comes in is great, though when your not muting it intentionally, you confidently mute some of the notes and it sounds weird. I like the lyrics. The high vocals could use some work, but maybe try a different harmony line that would be easier for you to hit. This is groovy though, good work.

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