A Scientific Experiement

At first I only flicked her fingers lightly
and she didn't move at all.
Then I tried it harder and she
flinched in her car seat.
The final time was much more fiercely.

A flash of tears appeared instantly,
as if already crying in her sleep.
My body floundered and my face flushed,
it felt like I had lost everything.
I had to carefully hide it from my mother.

I guess it was my way of candling
this thing to see if it was actually real,
if it cried like a normal sister would.
After that, it was pure, unconditional love
all the way.
Gorgeous. In it's own unique way. All I got though buddy. Just wanted to let you know I'm reading and always enjoying.
This puts a really strong image in mind of a young kid being curious about his younger sibling. Especially with the last stanza, it nicely puts a smile on your face.

I really really enjoyed this.
This was nice and... for lack of a better work, quaint. I think that is both it's blessing and it's curse. The innocence and, frankly, ignorance it projects is sweet and relatable. However, I also felt like your first two stanzas were kind of... direction-less. You were painting a sort of undetailed image; it was really fuzzy for me, like I got what was going on, but the lack of connection between the narrator and the "subject" as well as the lack of "age" for the narrator doesn't help. I think the latter could be fixed by moving this to present tense... make it the child telling the story, not looking back on it and I think it will make the innocence more fore-front in the first two stanzas, which could really clear those up and make the tone match the innocence of the image that you are painting.

I'd appreciate a bump on "chosen one" in the sig, if you get a chance. I had hoped for more feedback on that one and it never really got anywhere.

Great critique, as always, Zach. Thank you! I'll get to your piece now.

Blake, thanks! Would you still like me to critique A Trophy for Atrophy or the newest one?
I actually deleted the newest one, Winter Sky pointed out it seemed forced, so I'm gonna take it back to the drawing board. Go for Trophy please, and thank you.