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#1
Stories, memories, awkward moments, share them here!

I remeber her mom walking in while she unzipped my pants, her back was towards the door so she didn't know until her mom slammed the door shut again! We never talked about it again.
#2
inb4 I didn't.
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I had a dream about your avatar once, so yes of course.

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every time i see that twirling electrode avatar of yours I know that the post is worth reading or the link is worth clicking


#4
Wow... you totally blew a threesome opportunity.

I can't really give you the circumstances of my first time, but I had sex with a girl.
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#5
I dropped the soap in the boys shower room....
RIP Matt Lauer


Because i'd rather pretend you're dead than acknowledge your existence.
#7
the pit hasn't lost its virginity yet. your question is invalid.
whooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

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Reminds me of that drunkard who ran out of beer... he was so desperate, he drank furniture polish.

He came to a horrible end... but a beautiful finish.
#8
Yeah, about that...
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at your avatar

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Your avatar had me in stitches for a good two minutes.
#9
she came over
no one was home
sex
my step dad got home before we finished
he never knew she was there
#11
Mechanical bull riding at the bar. It was a while back, about a year ago. I was drunk, the bull didn't know what it was doing, but anyways, I hopped on. It started to move back and forth just real slow and then violently started moving in all directions, I'm surprised I had enough muscle and power to hold on to this thing. As I clutched the seat with my dear life, I slipped forward just a bit, noticing the tiny stubs for horns on the bull, I fell forward even further and prayed to God that I wouldn't get reamed, but alas it threw me ass forward by some obscure twist of fate, and it went in. The time of my bull riding went into the hall of fame.

So anyways, some girl thought I rode well so she offered to have sex with me, so we did it behind a dumpster. Beautiful.
#12
A few days after Christmas when I was 17, on an air mattress in a tiny backroom at her parents' house. There's more to it but that's the fun part.
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my chemical romance are a bunch of homos making love to a mic and you like that cuz your a huge gay wad. You should feel pathetic for being such a gaywad you gay mcr loving gaywad olllol.
#13
Quote by severed-metal
Mechanical bull riding at the bar. It was a while back, about a year ago. I was drunk, the bull didn't know what it was doing, but anyways, I hopped on. It started to move back and forth just real slow and then violently started moving in all directions, I'm surprised I had enough muscle and power to hold on to this thing. As I clutched the seat with my dear life, I slipped forward just a bit, noticing the tiny stubs for horns on the bull, I fell forward even further and prayed to God that I wouldn't get reamed, but alas it threw me ass forward by some obscure twist of fate, and it went in. The time of my bull riding went into the hall of fame.

So anyways, some girl thought I rode well so she offered to have sex with me, so we did it behind a dumpster. Beautiful.


Quote by guitarxo
I had a dream about your avatar once, so yes of course.

Quote by Bladez22


every time i see that twirling electrode avatar of yours I know that the post is worth reading or the link is worth clicking


#14
She blindfolded me, then she went for it. It wasn't until she took the blindfold off I realised she had left the room and her mum had taken over...


... then I woke up, and changed my bedding.
#15
I guess this one will be kind of different.

My mother worked all day. My father was out of the country. So they hired a nanny for me. She was about 22 years old while I was 12. One day, she saw me...well jacking off. My door was closed but the door knob was missing so she saw me through the little hole. Next day she talked to me about it, told me that she saw me and that she will tell me mom (she was a damn tease) unless I let her do it for me. I was like **** yeah why not, she was young and a nice body. Next day, I got home all nervous and excited. My heart pumping when I saw her. She was wearing a skirt this time, white one, almost reminded me as a nurse. She then said hi, finished moping and then came into my room. The rest is history hahah..gooood times and no regrets.

Funny thing is that she agreed to **** everyday if let her out an hour early lol.
#16
Quote by severed-metal
Mechanical bull riding at the bar. It was a while back, about a year ago. I was drunk, the bull didn't know what it was doing, but anyways, I hopped on. It started to move back and forth just real slow and then violently started moving in all directions, I'm surprised I had enough muscle and power to hold on to this thing. As I clutched the seat with my dear life, I slipped forward just a bit, noticing the tiny stubs for horns on the bull, I fell forward even further and prayed to God that I wouldn't get reamed, but alas it threw me ass forward by some obscure twist of fate, and it went in. The time of my bull riding went into the hall of fame.

So anyways, some girl thought I rode well so she offered to have sex with me, so we did it behind a dumpster. Beautiful.

That's great.


I was 19, and I fucked a 27 year old chick that I worked with at the time in her boyfriend's bed while he was at work.

Ah, memories...
XBOX LIVE Gamertag: Jazz Funeral
Currently killing with The Nunts crew in Max Payne 3

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ON LIGHTNING.
#18
Quote by Jazz Funeral
That's great.


I was 19, and I fucked a 27 year old chick that I worked with at the time in her boyfriend's bed while he was at work.

Ah, memories...

Where can I get that gig?
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Yup, a girl went up to me in my fursuit one time.

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#19
Quote by Jackal58
Where can I get that gig?

Oh shit, punctuation failure.


Err, I mean one state over in good ol' Wisconsin.
XBOX LIVE Gamertag: Jazz Funeral
Currently killing with The Nunts crew in Max Payne 3

Quote by Weaponized
ON LIGHTNING.
#20
Quote by cisco444
I guess this one will be kind of different.

My mother worked all day. My father was out of the country. So they hired a nanny for me. She was about 22 years old while I was 12. One day, she saw me...well jacking off. My door was closed but the door knob was missing so she saw me through the little hole. Next day she talked to me about it, told me that she saw me and that she will tell me mom (she was a damn tease) unless I let her do it for me. I was like **** yeah why not, she was young and a nice body. Next day, I got home all nervous and excited. My heart pumping when I saw her. She was wearing a skirt this time, white one, almost reminded me as a nurse. She then said hi, finished moping and then came into my room. The rest is history hahah..gooood times and no regrets.

Funny thing is that she agreed to **** everyday if let her out an hour early lol.

pics or it didn't happen
HILT!

Where's Waldo?

#21
my dad :'(


but no really some fat chick on a half day of high school....hey i am not gonna lie at the time i thought i was never gonna get laid in my life...glad life has gone uphill...
#22
Park during some semi-drunk hookup. I had a large bedspread that I set out on some flat grass. We had sex twice that night. Fun shit.

My knees hurt the next morning.
GEAR
Epiphone SG-400
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#23
In a tent whilst camping. It was pretty subpar. Neither of us had any experience.
However, I've come a long way
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"Trans Princess". You're bitching over nothing, and you know it.
#24
I dated my girlfriend for 3 months and then the 3rd time she came over we just did it. Not too spectacular

I couldn't get it up though, so I guess that's what sticks out...
#25
Yeah... no.
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your just a simpleton that cant understand strategy apparently.

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all hail king of the penis sucking(i said balls. you said dick for some reason?) Isabiggles
#26
Well, I'll just let time answer that!
You are now using UG Black.
You are now using UG Classic.


Listening to: Duke Ellington


I'm sick and tired of people calling America the stupidest country in the world. I personally think Europe is the stupidest country.
#27
Quote by alexz64
I dated my girlfriend for 3 months and then the 3rd time she came over we just did it. Not too spectacular

I couldn't get it up though, so I guess that's what sticks out...

Or not...
XBOX LIVE Gamertag: Jazz Funeral
Currently killing with The Nunts crew in Max Payne 3

Quote by Weaponized
ON LIGHTNING.
#29
Quote by cisco444
I guess this one will be kind of different.

My mother worked all day. My father was out of the country. So they hired a nanny for me. She was about 22 years old while I was 12. One day, she saw me...well jacking off. My door was closed but the door knob was missing so she saw me through the little hole. Next day she talked to me about it, told me that she saw me and that she will tell me mom (she was a damn tease) unless I let her do it for me. I was like **** yeah why not, she was young and a nice body. Next day, I got home all nervous and excited. My heart pumping when I saw her. She was wearing a skirt this time, white one, almost reminded me as a nurse. She then said hi, finished moping and then came into my room. The rest is history hahah..gooood times and no regrets.

Funny thing is that she agreed to **** everyday if let her out an hour early lol.

Last edited by genghisgandhi at Sep 11, 2011,
#30
Quote by alexz64
I dated my girlfriend for 3 months and then the 3rd time she came over we just did it. Not too spectacular

I couldn't get it up though, so I guess that's what sticks out...


Or not.

#32
In an alley.
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Theory is descriptive, not prescriptive.


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theory states 1+1=2 sometimes in music 1+1=3.
#36
The day after I hooked up and met a girl at a party we chilled the next day and she was a virgin and so was I so we went in my car and did it twice and the condom is still on the curb to this day and it's been almost a year.
#38
dirtbag ballet by the bins down the alley
as i walk through the chalet of the shadow of death
everything that you've come to expect


#39
Girlfriend of a couple of months came over, we'd done lots of other stuff before and decided we were ready so it just happened I guess, nothing really awkward or exciting about it really. The only barely interesting thing about it was that I can pinpoint the exact date because of the football match that was on the telly at the time.
#40
I went to a party with this girl and we had expressed mutual interest in each other for some time. Anyway, we went back to her place, she remarked that I reeked of whiskey, and then I inserted my penis into her vagina until climax.
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