#1
Today when I came home from school my mom asked me if I had hemroids or if I was bleeding from my dick. I was half laughing, a quarter thinking "wtf" and another quarter was just thinking "what drugs are you on?"

So pit, has anybody ever asked random questions like that, been 100% serious or worried, and meant everything they said?
#4


No. And I second the request for your response.
they're coming to take me away
ha-haaa
#5
****, your mum is wierd... jks, my mum occasionally says random stuff like this too!
#6
I'm assuming she found some sort of red substance in your drawers. Might wanna check for yourself.
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#7
Are you bleeding from your dick?
*-)
Quote by Bob_Sacamano
i kinda wish we all had a penis and vagina instead of buttholes

i mean no offense to buttholes and poop or anything

Rest in Peace, Troy Davis and Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis and Eric Garner and Mike Brown
#8
I once asked my girlfriend whether she knows how to masturbate(I had actual reason to ask it), she didn't asnwer.
#9
Maybe she saw blood in your underwear and thought you were on your period. It's perfectly normal. It happens to everyone. My Mum found blood in my boxer shorts and asked if I was on my period. I wasn't at the time. It was someone else's blood.
#10
No bleeding from my dick here, and no hemroids. She was asking all of this because she was going through my dresser (*****!!!) and found that a pair of my boxers had blood on them. But that was just because a few weeks ago I was biking, flipped and was bleeding like a bitch.
#11
Quote by WholeLottaIzzy
My Mum found blood in my boxer shorts and asked if I was on my period. I wasn't at the time. It was someone else's blood.

This needs to be sig'd.
#13
and my response was basically just explaining what had happened. But I swear my face must've looked really messed up when she said all of this.
#17
"Is.... is that light on?"

- me to my mates
your whisper may sway the weak, but when i speak it roars the seas
#18
Quote by Zeletros
I once asked my girlfriend whether she knows how to masturbate(I had actual reason to ask it), she didn't asnwer.


Because she had no fingers?
Quote by Tango616
Watching a fat kid dance around in a white shirt....wow...Al Gore was right...the glaciers really ARE shifting.


Quote by Horsedick.MPEG
It's because Fassa got banned

RIP Dime
#19
Quote by Megadethfan245
No bleeding from my dick here, and no hemroids. She was asking all of this because she was going through my dresser (*****!!!) and found that a pair of my boxers had blood on them. But that was just because a few weeks ago I was biking, flipped and was bleeding like a bitch.

Why would your mom go through your dresser? Or better yet, even be in your room?


Just tell her your dick got chopped off but it grew back.
#20
Quote by SlayingDragons
Tsk tsk, should have said "I cum blood."


It's overused, but it would have been perfect.

Man you're right, should've said it!!!
#21
Quote by jetfuel495
My mom asked me if I was gay once.

It was irritating, to say the least. First they tell you, "dont talk to girls, you're having an arranged marriage" and then its "are you gay?"

Silly immigrant parents.
You have an arranged marriage?

Luuuccccckkkyyyy!
*-)
Quote by Bob_Sacamano
i kinda wish we all had a penis and vagina instead of buttholes

i mean no offense to buttholes and poop or anything

Rest in Peace, Troy Davis and Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis and Eric Garner and Mike Brown
#23
Quote by itamar101
is he gay?
A little.
*-)
Quote by Bob_Sacamano
i kinda wish we all had a penis and vagina instead of buttholes

i mean no offense to buttholes and poop or anything

Rest in Peace, Troy Davis and Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis and Eric Garner and Mike Brown
#25
Quote by element4433
A little.


more than a little.
There's no such thing; there never was. Where I am going you cannot follow me now.
#27
Quote by ....Satan
Because she had no fingers?



Dude.


When you're having your finger slowly moving around girls lower private parts, and they ask you "What are you doing?", you know that something's wrong. She was 18 at that time. Actually she's an Ex-GF, not a GF.
#28
Quote by jetfuel495
It's like I don't even have to try
Exactly! That's how the world should be.
*-)
Quote by Bob_Sacamano
i kinda wish we all had a penis and vagina instead of buttholes

i mean no offense to buttholes and poop or anything

Rest in Peace, Troy Davis and Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis and Eric Garner and Mike Brown
#30
Quote by element4433
Exactly! That's how the world should be.

That would suck, I like making my own choices.
#31
Quote by BlackVoid
That would suck, I like making my own choices.


yup, getting to choose between getting rejected by Girl A or Girl B is great.
There's no such thing; there never was. Where I am going you cannot follow me now.
#33
Quote by BlackVoid
That would suck, I like making my own choices.
You won't be saying that when you're 36 and alone.
*-)
Quote by Bob_Sacamano
i kinda wish we all had a penis and vagina instead of buttholes

i mean no offense to buttholes and poop or anything

Rest in Peace, Troy Davis and Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis and Eric Garner and Mike Brown
#34
Quote by theogonia777
yup, getting to choose between getting rejected by Girl A or Girl B is great.

That would suck if there was only two girls on this planet.

Quote by element4433
You won't be saying that when you're 36 and alone.
Speak for yourself.
Last edited by BlackVoid at Sep 12, 2011,