Kaz3-6-0
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Join date: Aug 2007
1,294 IQ
#1
Hey UG, this is another songmade for my music comp. class. The project is to create a song with a section of it that does not make "sense" musically, where I chose to use it in bar 97. I'm still debating whether to make this an instrumental piece or add some vocals to it.

Thanks!
Attachments:
Evolution of Chaos.gp5
Kalo Hanaka
Kalo Hanaka
Join date: Sep 2007
278 IQ
#2
What kind of vocals do you have to use? I have a feeling it could be cool with maybe some kind of mixture between a kind of Tom Waits clean singing, and all out screaming (think Strapping Young Lad) around the chorus sections?

The song itself sounds good in context of what you actually wanted... :P

Edit: Maybe a heavy phase shifter or something like that for the introduction?
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Last edited by Kalo Hanaka at Sep 17, 2011,
Kaz3-6-0
?
Join date: Aug 2007
1,294 IQ
#3
I was thinking of something operatic, like Warell Dane, or a monotone "speech" type "singing in the chorus, but some screaming syllables might sound good, too.
i just tried playing the begining with a bit of phase shifting, and it sounded amazing, thanks!
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Kalo Hanaka
Kalo Hanaka
Join date: Sep 2007
278 IQ
#4
Warrel Dane, looked him up right now on Youtube... Sounds pretty damn good in my book! Could definately work great, yeah. Record the instruments first of course, and then go for the vocals. If the vocals turn out bad, one doesn't need it really.

You're welcome! Everything's better with a bit of phase shifting, hehe.
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frankibo
UG Board King
Join date: May 2007
3,093 IQ
#5
That intro riff sounds like something else...
Anyway, we move on.
The drums are terrible and ruin the piece for me. Ignoring them, the riffs are decent and the leads are alright but there's nothing really catchy or interesting enough for me to latch on to. I like the piano bit at the end though.
With some work this could be improved.
Short C4C? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1477357
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Colossus
Kaz3-6-0
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Join date: Aug 2007
1,294 IQ
#6
Thanks for the crit!
Now that you mention it, the intro does sound like something, but I can't put my finger on it. I'm not much of a drummer, so the drumming is terrible, I agree. One of my friends is a jazz/metal drummer, I'm sure he can come up with some killer beats
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robertito696
Cybernetic Comp. Organism
Join date: Oct 2008
1,492 IQ
#7
The part that wasn't supposed to make sense reminded me of Cephalic Carnage. I like the chorus a lot, it's incredibly simple but I love the combination of heavy chords with droning open strings.

That descending bit at the 4th bar of every verse got old pretty quick, mixing that up occasionally even with just a slight variation would help significantly, as is the verse as a hole gets quite stale. I also really disliked the lead bit that starts at bar 73, it just seemed way off and not in the sense that it makes it interesting, it's just off putting.

The piano at the end was excellent, and the part at bar 96 was actually one of my favorite parts. verse needs some work but it was solid none the less.

C4C? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=28194000#post28194000
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Life Is Brutal
Master of Modulation
Join date: Jun 2008
3,873 IQ
#8
Pretty good overall, although some of the dissonance and chromatics seemed uneeded in the grand scope of things.

You should also look into how notes segue and resolve into one another, because almost all of your sections resolve on your low D5 without any variation in the prior riff to make it flow. Even a simple drum variation on the last repeat would do wonders.

Chaos has a farily sudden transition, but I feel you could get more tension out of it with "More Proper" dissonance between the guitars.

C4C?

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1481924