#1
i dont often ask the pit for help but ive got this essay due tomorrow, its 1:30 am, and i have a bit of writers block... help me pit.

i'd have this done but ive been procrastinating(and procrasturbating) for the past 3 days...


anyways, i chose to do my essay on censorship. i have an opening paragraph and 2 other paragraphs in which i state my opinion. i need 1 more paragraph sating my opinion and a closing paragraph

*incoming wall of text*

"Censorship is defined as the act of suppressing
content deemed objectionable on moral, political, military, or
other grounds. In other words, censorship is the abolishment
of content believed, by a censor, to be harmful to an audience
of people who are apparantly incapable of making decisions for
themselves. When someone or something prevents a person from
seeing, hearing, feeling, or experiencing any event that
person wishes to, it is impeding that person's ability to live
how they choose and that, in my opinion, is immoral.


Supporters of censorship claim that it promotes good
morals and protects minors from pornographic material.
Censorship may hide this pornographic material from minors,
but being ignorant isn't the same as being protected. It is
possible for parents to teach thier children good morals
without shrouding them from things that they dont agree with.
In fact, by showing them these things and explaining whats
wrong with them, parents can educate their children of why
they are actually inappropriate.


At it's roots, the purpose of censorship is to protect
a general body of people from speech, or other forms of
communication, which may seem objectionable or immoral. The
problem with this is that different people have different
views on what is and what isn't acceptable behaviour. Because
of this, if something is banned based on a censor's opinion,
someone is being prevented from accessing media that they wish
to have access to. Therefore, the only feasible option for
controlling content, that doesn't discriminate against
individuals with different opinions, is to let people decide
for themselves what is inappropriate."

and thats how equestria was made


anyways the opinionated paragraph needs to have a clear point (like paragraph 2 having to do with the affect of censorship on children, paragraph 3 having to do with an alternative solution, etc...)

any ideas for a 3rd paragraph subject, pit?


i just need the subject, not a word for word paragraph.


the closing paragraph is where i have trouble normally. it seems i can't close it without using the words, "and thats why censorship is bad".
#2
I'll help you if you give me examples of how Amy Hempel displays female ache in her writing and how it contrasts male rage in the transgressional fiction genre.
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Last edited by zappp : Today at 4:20 PM. Reason: Suck on my balls, UG
#5
Quote by rickyj

*incoming wall of text*

"Censorship is defined as the act of suppressing
content deemed objectionable on moral, political, military, or
other grounds. In other words, censorship is the abolishment
of content believed, by a censor, to be harmful to an audience
of people who are apparantly incapable of making decisions for
themselves
. When someone or something prevents a person from
seeing, hearing, feeling, or experiencing any event that
person wishes to, it is impeding that person's ability to live
how they choose and that, in my opinion, is immoral.



I dunno if you should put that in your opening paragraph. Maybe just leave it for your opinion paragraph. Maybe just to talk about how the censor doesn't respect the people and their ability to make choices for themselves. Dunno
#6
Quote by Colgate Total
I'll help you if you give me examples of how Amy Hempel displays female ache in her writing and how it contrasts male rage in the transgressional fiction genre.



i rarely get into literature in a big way, that being said, i find her work shallow and pedantic and i choose not to cave to your peer-pressure by reading any more of that nonsense.
#8
I wrote a ten page paper on censorship for my english 2010 class last semester. I can give it to you if you want. You could probably find what your looking for in it somewhere
#9
Quote by almosthuman36
I wrote a ten page paper on censorship for my english 2010 class last semester. I can give it to you if you want. You could probably find what your looking for in it somewhere



unnecessary, an example of a paragraph would be more reasonable, if you dont mind that is
#10
Quote by rickyj
i rarely get into literature in a big way, that being said, i find her work shallow and pedantic and i choose not to cave to your peer-pressure by reading any more of that nonsense.


Did... Did you seriously just quote Family Guy?
Like podcasts? Listen to these!
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VIDEO GAMES!
MOVIES/GEEKY SHIT!

_______________________________________________
Last edited by zappp : Today at 4:20 PM. Reason: Suck on my balls, UG
#11
Talk about how censoring pornography is supposed to be a means of protecting womens rights. It has the opposite effect. When censors try and support womens rights by censoring they take the focus away from real issues like employment and political power. it turns it in to a moral issue by attacking some womens personal decisions. Instead of the equal rights issue that needs to be addressed.
#12
Closing paragraphs are a place where your opinion about the topic is stated.

Basically its a form of this....

The constricting idea of censorhip is a menace not only because *Idea from paragraph 1*, but also because it *Idea from paragraph 2* and *Idea from paragraph 3*. Then offer a solution or alternative and support it with why you think that is better.
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#14
your paragraphs are rather short...i didn't think of ideas for your third, but i suggest adding more bs to make it more entertaining, since it's meant to express your opinion. put a rhetorical question or an "imagine if," or something.

this may sound incredible, but i actually believe in the whole outlining process that they teach you in school - don't start until you know everything you're going to write about.

*also fix your grammar
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#15
Quote by Thrashtastic15
I write posts bigger than your 'essay'...



it's supposed to be a 5 paragraph practice essay for a test we have in a few months


im not trying to write a novel here


edit: also,


es·say/ˈesā/
Noun: A short piece of writing on a particular subject.


there isn't a minimum character count for it to be consider an essay.


you should be more constructive with your criticism in the future.
Last edited by rickyj at Sep 26, 2011,
#16
Quote by rickyj
it's supposed to be a 5 paragraph practice essay for a test we have in a few months


im not trying to write a novel here


edit: also,


es·say/ˈesā/
Noun: A short piece of writing on a particular subject.


there isn't a minimum character count for it to be consider an essay.


you should be more constructive with your criticism in the future.


It's ok, Thrash is just generally quite an angry person, all the time.

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Most of his posts, however small, far exceed him in the genital region.
#17
Quote by almosthuman36
Talk about how censoring pornography is supposed to be a means of protecting womens rights. It has the opposite effect. When censors try and support womens rights by censoring they take the focus away from real issues like employment and political power. it turns it in to a moral issue by attacking some womens personal decisions. Instead of the equal rights issue that needs to be addressed.



thanks for the help but i felt a paragraph like this wouldn't really fit into a simple 5 paragraph paper, also i dont want my tteacher to ask awkward questions about pornography.


incase you're curious, for the 3rd paragraph i discussed the PMRC hearing that resulted in the parental discretion sticker and the negative affect of it.


thanks for the help everyone, ive got it covered i think.
#18
I wrote an essay on Freedom of the Press for my stage 2 Censorship and Toleration in Politics paper at uni last year. You may find this paragraph useful


Furthermore, it has once been said that a person’s perception of reality is a result of their beliefs. In today’s age, most of our beliefs are formed via the mainstream media. Accurate media representations of world issues are crucial. Whenever media reports are censored or biased, the people’s fundamental rights are systematically undermined. An accurate media representation of events is vital to the attainment and advancement of knowledge, and the search for truth. It was believed by political thinker, and liberalist, John Stewart Mill that a well rounded judgement was only possible if one considered all facts and ideas, and tested ones judgement against opposing views (Addleman 2010). By allowing press freedom, and freedom of expression, one is presented with a wide array of views, enabling a person to be well informed.
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#21
is that an essay?
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#22
Currently doing my "C-uppsats" which has to be around 30-40 pages... it frowns down on the three paragraphs you call an essay.
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#23
Quote by rickyj
it's supposed to be a 5 paragraph practice essay for a test we have in a few months

Well I'm glad it's only a practice essay for the sake of your marks.


Quote by rickyj
im not trying to write a novel here

Evidently.


Quote by rickyj
edit: also,


es·say/ˈesā/
Noun: A short piece of writing on a particular subject.


there isn't a minimum character count for it to be consider an essay.

Sure, there isn't a minimum character count. However, you should try to adequetely develop coherent points and promote a full understanding of the concepts you are arguing to the reader. Your essay fails to do that as you don't properly present the concepts. If I handed in your essay during any grade (except maybe grade 5), I'd fail. It's just plain not good. Fix your grammar, improve your syntax and diction, add some evidence and sources, considerably beef up your points, and you might have a half decent essay on your hands.

Quote by rickyj
you should be more constructive with your criticism in the future.

Ok. Buy "how to write an essay for dummies".
#24
A bit of history of censorship? ie. of letters during the world wars?
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