#1
Wow, this is an old piece. This goes back to when I first started writing... probably in the same month that I started. Haven't put it on here so... just wondering what people think.

The Coke's gone flat

Sometimes I feel so sad
And for that I guess I must be bad
I'm thinking thats just how I think
I try not to make it obvious
And looking back at memories
And finding the wrong link

Do you feel you try too hard
Just to lose out on
The thing you most desire
You sound just like me
Maybe we just need to be free

I will get better
I will find a way
I will find a greater day
I will lose my addiction

I feel nothing but empty feelings
My body has left and left me reeling
I breathe in days
And breathe out nights
No one can hear me
Even though I'm crying out

I will get better
I will find a way
I will find a greater day
I will lose my addiction

Curse you beloved sun
You're light catches my mother tongue
Speaking out is not what I say
No not what I say

I will get better
I will find a way
I will find a greater day
I will lose my addiction
#2
The first stanza seems kind of like the same old same old, but I think that besides a few (I hate to say it) cliche rhymes it really suits the rest. Overall though, I enjoy just the general theme and the choice of words in the second to last stanza.