#1
Well I dont want to live on this planet anymore...So I wrote this.....It sums it all up pretty well...


Nothing Left

An emptiness I have not felt for so long
I feel the sad song echoing throughout
I own nothing at the moment except for
A hole in my chest and memories you left
A perfect oval so shiny and pure
Has ellipsed away leaving a blur


I let myself flow with the pain just to feel
I stand in the fire to burn feelings away
Now I stand numb and fantasizing of death
I have left this world already...there is nothing left


What did I do to bring these events to pass
I just wanted to be loved for a change
I walked the streets to bring it all back now
Bring back all the memories I still have
I want to forget you but, you are my everything
Listen to my heartbeats fade into oblivion


I let myself flow with the pain just to feel
I stand in the fire to burn feelings away
Now I stand numb and fantasizing of death
I have left this world already...there is nothing left
There is nothing left
There is nothing left
There is nothing left


Come for me now heavens angels of doom
Lead me to the gallows of the forgotten
Carry me to through the final stages of life
Only to help me stumble upon death's fortress
The light that guided me has now faded away
Good day to this life that never wanted me to stay


There is nothing left
There is nothing left
There is nothing left
There is nothing left

I hope that this brought you happiness
When you see it on the news in a day or so
I hope you cry from sheer enjoyment and laughter
When you see it on the news in a day or so
Know that you left my with nothing.....

With nothing to live for
With nothing to smile about
With nothing to stop me
You left me with nothing....


Is it good enough to make into a post-hardcore song one day?...I think it sucks...then again I think everything I do and write sucks....

Ok I just edited it....And it still sucks...I dont think there is an original way to write about heartbreak and emptiness....Well at least i have not found a way yet....

if anyone really wants to bother to crit this it is C4C
I haz gotten gud
Last edited by ApatheticMe at Oct 4, 2011,
#2
this doesnt suck! cheer up emo kid! it should be 'THERE is...' you just used the wrong form. not a tough fix though
#3
Generic with terrible wording and overly simple sentence forming. But then again you want to use it in a post hardcore song? Will fit right in
#4
God dammit.....I knew that version of "their' was wrong god dammit......

I am editing it....in a few different ways....

I am not emo....ok maybe a bit (wtf where is the emo smiley?!!!)

But i am still depressed...so I might be posting a few more like this....
I haz gotten gud
Last edited by ApatheticMe at Oct 4, 2011,