Rossielle
Registered User
Join date: Aug 2010
896 IQ
#2
Quote by Subguy
wrote this a long time ago, wonder if you people dig this

i said just WOW. it is an amazing song i like the string,but i think you could improve them a little to have an better progression.

look at this and tell me if you like
Attachments:
Death Awaits The Open Horizons.gp5
Burning_Angel
Valar Morghulis
Join date: Jun 2006
2,379 IQ
#3
Dont have time right now for more of a crit, but I would honestly say the best way to improve this is to cut out the first four bars completely. They're completely superfluous and dont even add to the atmosphere or fit the mood...

And the drums need some work on transitions/helping transitions...
Quote by MoogleRancha
It's like Fenriz and J. Read

"I'm so happy to love metal and stuff"

"I AM metal"
bassburton
Multi Genre Influenced
Join date: Jan 2007
1,365 IQ
#4
I really enjoyed this. It has avery Agalloch feel to it. Especially with the simple power chord and melody combo. I certainly notice you gave it your own flair though. Especially with the low register 2 note guitar chords. The only real thing you could do (in my opinion) is "breathing" a little more life into the bass to really aid in the atmosphere of the song.

Also... The guitar melody at bar 69 is so wonderful and yet... so simple. I do agree with the other users though... in that the song could still use some work to further improve it. But overall, you got something really good going on. It has a lot of potential.

Did not particularly like the blast section to be honest, I feel it detracted from the overall flow from the song. You have a very keen sense for melodies though.
The clock strikes midnight
When tomorrow and today collide
The moon is at its highest
And the twilight seems fitting
For in these moments
The light at the end of the world
Shines like a thousand suns....


Victor Gutierrez
Subguy
Blood Elf Bassist
Join date: Jun 2007
403 IQ
#5
Quote by Burning_Angel
Dont have time right now for more of a crit, but I would honestly say the best way to improve this is to cut out the first four bars completely. They're completely superfluous and dont even add to the atmosphere or fit the mood...

And the drums need some work on transitions/helping transitions...


i don't really want it to start at the riff afterwards, i didn't have an idea for it.