#1
I have far too many thoughts to be awake at an hour like this
I ponder upon the state of my dreams, if they’re no longer in my head then where could they be?
Lost somewhere at sea inside of the capital M-e?
For I’d say I control my own destiny but that requires faith that I simply can’t see.
I’d chock it up to a lack of imagination, but sometimes I swear I feel my skin touching skin, so I write that off.

Christ, I can hear my teeth.
I can follow my heart if I walk to the beat, but sometimes it’s moving too fast for my feet.
I take in a breath and hold it so deep that my eyes get fuzzy and my bones feel weak.
Shit, I barely believe in the words that I speak much less in the words that I’m told I should read.

So I close my eyes and I finally can see with a feigned sense of clarity, ripped from beneath
My brilliant machinations, in 4/4 I speak,
but the rhythm is still shaky and the melody is bleak.

So I walk much softer, for the floorboards they creak.
But mighty was the footstep that led to the creek.
I saw sinners and saints and the body was deep.
I would dip myself in but I fear I may sink,
for I’ve already drowned in my bitter defeat.
I’ve far too many thoughts to let myself sleep.

So I close my eyes, knowing there is a vast and beautiful world out there, when suddenly I realize I’ve started to weep.
You’re selfish and petty for all that you think is of death and of longing and your crooked front teeth.
A smile, a dance, a laugh, a blink
You’re alive my friend, that is all that you should need.
#2
I like this, from a first readthrough. I'm not sure how you meant it to play out, but i'm getting a real older-country singer vibe from this. Still, the metre is nice and the lines flow well. Good effort.