#1
I'll try to make this as short as I can.I'm going to go ahead and give the full scenario so I can hopefully get better responses.

So around April of this year our singer and I needed a drummer to play at our school prom.We had been playing together for a few months at this point but nothing serious. We finally found someone to do it and we played the show. After it was over the drummer didn't want load up and take the drums back to her house, so we asked if we could borrow them.She rarely played anymore and drums would be fun to play around with. She had no intention of actually starting a band with us.

Our original practice space was a cramped little garage, so I asked my friend if we could use his giant shed out in the country and he said it would be awesome. After going out there and jamming a few times, we finally set up the drums. After a while, we offered the friend to play drums and he accepted. He picked it up pretty fast, he wasn't great by any means, but he could keep a basic beat.

After a while we started writing our own songs and we're doing pretty good, but our drummer has made very little improvement and he'll often quit playing right in the middle of a song if something goes wrong. He has been wearing us very thin lately(the singer and I), he constantly makes stupid jokes about the singer like he is trying to belittle him or something.I honestly don't think he practices drumming ever and he doesn't actually know any of our songs.

Normally one would say just get a new drummer, but there's a few hiccups. He's been one of my best friends since childhood and he invested a considerable amount of money in a new drum set. Not to mention we have an awesome practice space. I know he would take it very harshly if we kicked him out, but I don't know what else to do at this point.

Any thoughts?
#2
Tell him that you guys are really serious about the whole band thing. You two need to lay down some rules since you are the majority. Tell him he needs to know the songs. and he can't just stop mid song. The jokes are just jokes. Don't kick him out. Just let him know you and the singer mean business about the band.
PSN - Boosted928
#3
Quote by boosted928
Tell him that you guys are really serious about the whole band thing. You two need to lay down some rules since you are the majority. Tell him he needs to know the songs. and he can't just stop mid song. The jokes are just jokes. Don't kick him out. Just let him know you and the singer mean business about the band.


This
#4
Don't kick him out until you have a replacement.

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#5
Why not? If things can't be worked out and improved upon, why delay the inevitable?

CT
Could I get some more talent in the monitors, please?

I know it sounds crazy, but try to learn to inhale your voice. www.thebelcantotechnique.com

Chris is the king of relating music things to other objects in real life.
#6
Quote by boosted928
Tell him that you guys are really serious about the whole band thing. You two need to lay down some rules since you are the majority. Tell him he needs to know the songs. and he can't just stop mid song. The jokes are just jokes. Don't kick him out. Just let him know you and the singer mean business about the band.


Talk to him.

Talk to him about what your goals are, and ask him what role he'd like to have in that.

If he's serious, say, "Well, here's the thing ..." and talk to him about what you need from him if you guys want to go where he just said he wants to go.

If he's not, say, "I think we need to start looking for a drummer who wants to take that journey with us."

Don't start looking for another drummer without telling him (assume he'll find out) and don't just throw him out without talking to him. You're a team.

And, you know, singers can be egotistical prats, but the singer is hanging it all out there in a way that no other musician on stage is. If people start throwing tomatoes, they're going to aim them at him. Most singers are far more naked up on stage than any other musician.

And it's fine to deflate someone who's head is getting a bit big, but as a band you need to support each other. And, at some point, you need to say that to him.

These are separate issues, though, and maybe shouldn't be talked about at the same time so it doesn't feel like "gang up on so-and-so" day.

Have these conversations in person, like a man. As friends. Respectfully. Even if the upshot is that he's not the right drummer for you.

Sometimes, you have that conversation and you don't need to fire the guy, because he realizes it's a bad fit and withdraw gracefully. But if you just kick the guy out, you can pretty much guarantee that you won't be friends with him anymore for a while.