lfcagger
twat
Join date: Jan 2011
637 IQ
#1
So I'm practicing my writing with short simple songs and this is my first one that I'm happy with. I'm not quite sure what it is, but there would be lyrics in some parts. See what you think and tell me where I need to improve please! Cheers.

By the way, listen in RSE if possible. Also, there are a few double dots in the intro melody that didn't export to the GP5 file. Sorry.
Attachments:
Straight Ahead.gp5
Straight Ahead.gpx
My stuff


Gibson Les Paul Studio
Ibanez ADC120
Tanglewood TGRF VS
Blackstar HT20
Roland Micro Cube
MobiuZ
Registered User
Join date: Nov 2009
1,119 IQ
#2
hey man i listened to your gpx file , i must say at first it was nice but you chord progression gets old quick , now i see your new ( i assume ) to song writing so ill go easy on you.

in fact , for a newb this is pretty amazing ! at least you know your chords and melodys , and added some nice dynamics and a tempo change , so you got your basic structures allready wich is a big leap imo.

Anyway good song but to repetitive id change it around at bar 16. change up the chords there go higher go lower or something , it would add a lot to dynamics.


Can you crit the holy crusade with gpx for me ? its in my sig.
Last edited by MobiuZ at Nov 21, 2011,
Ultraussie
I have a user title now!
Join date: Mar 2011
1,834 IQ
#3
Catchy!
Good melody
But it got way too repetive.
Try messing around with time signatures, polyrhythms, triplets, maybye a breakdown or two, guitar solo etc
Otherwise solid effort.
METAL!