Poll: Would you be offended if you slept over and I farted in the morning?
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View poll results: Would you be offended if you slept over and I farted in the morning?
Absolutely. That is disgusting.
57 29%
I would ignore it.
37 19%
I would high-five you.
39 20%
hehehehehehehehehehe farts hehehehe
65 33%
Voters: 198.
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#1
My girl stayed over last night. Well I ate some pizza last night which tends to get me all gassy. Anyhow this morning I was really lazy and didn't feel like getting up so I ended up farting very audibly in bed. I was barely awake.

Anyhow, when we finally got up she kept talking about how she's feeling wishy washy about whether or not we should be together.

I'm trying to figure out if it's because I farted, or if it's something else, or if it's a combination of farting and other problems....

help me pit!!! would you be offended if you slept with me and I farted in the morning?
#2
Should have dutch ovened her.
dirtbag ballet by the bins down the alley
as i walk through the chalet of the shadow of death
everything that you've come to expect


#3
Quote by Trowzaa
Should have dutch ovened her.
Explain please.

Eh, it's gross, but sometimes, if you gotta fart, you gotta fart, I guess
they're coming to take me away
ha-haaa
#4
She wants to break up coz u farted.....jeez I wonder what will happen when her husband is like 80 and needs help taking a shit.........
Quote by SlinkyBlue


The solution is simple and obvious.

We revolt against ourselves. Mass suicide. The ultimate revolution.
#5
It depends on how long you two have been together. For example, I think she should be able to overlook it if you've been married for 30 years.
#7
Quote by geetarguy13
I'm trying to figure out if it's because I farted, or if it's something else.


That tickled me.
#8
Quote by Banjocal
Explain please.



Fart under the covers and hold them over her face.
dirtbag ballet by the bins down the alley
as i walk through the chalet of the shadow of death
everything that you've come to expect


#9
Me and my gf aren't afraid to fart in front of each other. Maybe your fart was in fact a whistle and thought you have been with men. Nawmsayin?
Hi, you're better than me. Have a nice day!
#10
Quote by Trowzaa
Should have dutch ovened her.



Farts are for real men. If she can't deal with it, well, sh- why would you fart in bed?
Hell I'd leave you.
#11
I like how you mention that your relationship has other problems, but it's the farting in the bed that you're focusing on.
R.I.P. M.C.A.
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Quote by blake1221
Don't be ludicrous, lushacrous.
Quote by Gunpowder
that joke regarding your username was NOT originally posted by blake1221. That was a Gunpowder original.

I INVOKE SOPA TO SMITE YE FOR THIS FALSEHOOD.
#13
Quote by Trowzaa
Should have dutch ovened her.


Good god no.


Anyway TS why did you think this would be acceptable? It is completely not acceptable.

If you have been together a few months maybe, but do you really think audible farts will impress someone you just met?

That's up there with not having a lock on your bathroom door as a potential boundary issue, she probably wondered what your idea of comfortable is if that's how you act to a near-stranger...
#14
Quote by Trowzaa
Fart under the covers and hold them over her face.

That is vile.
they're coming to take me away
ha-haaa
#17
TS, you were probably just really bad.

Quote by Banjocal
Explain please.


you kill the person and cook them in a dutch oven, and then serve them to your next girlfriend. that way you can dispose of them and not have to pay to take your next girlfriend to eat.
There's no such thing; there never was. Where I am going you cannot follow me now.
#18
Quote by SkepsisMetal


That's just digusting sir, I feel physically sick just thinking of that. You should be ashamed.
dirtbag ballet by the bins down the alley
as i walk through the chalet of the shadow of death
everything that you've come to expect


#19
Quote by Flying Couch
Farting in bed really depends on you, the girl, and your collective sense of humor.


And how long you've been together.
Check out my band Disturbed
#20
if she's got a problem with you farting in your own bed, tell her she's welcome to sleep on the floor. girls fart too, as much as some of them would like you to believe otherwise.
mugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmug
#21
Quote by jakesmellspoo
if she's got a problem with you farting in your own bed, tell her she's welcome to sleep on the floor. girls fart too, as much as some of them would like you to believe otherwise.

Right but whatever gender you are, you can always hold it in and it will fade away into your rectum. If you fart in your sleep you can't do much about it.
#22
Quote by Flying Couch
Farting in bed really depends on you, the girl, and your collective sense of humor.

And if she thinks farts are funny, then you may as well just break it off.
#23
No, not offensive. Just ****ing weird, I wouldn't want anyone farting next to me in the middle of the night. Hey, at least it was a loud one: No smell.
#24
I always shifted my buttocks apart to stop the sound.
Harry Potter is DEAD! Ehhhhh heh heeehhhh!!!
-Voldemort
#25
Quote by metaldud536
Right but whatever gender you are, you can always hold it in and it will fade away into your rectum. If you fart in your sleep you can't do much about it.

Thou shalt not suppress flatulence. That is the 7th ALL-o-Gistic.

The Bassmaster General has spoken.
mugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmug
#26
If you're awake you can just do it somewhere else or at least make it quiet, if you're asleep then you can't really help it.
It depends on the person though, I have a female friend that farts around me and I do too, we just kind of ignore it but we aren't obnoxious about it like some people (ts :mad
#27
Quote by metaldud536
Right but whatever gender you are, you can always hold it in and it will fade away into your rectum. If you fart in your sleep you can't do much about it.



fire hazard.........
Quote by SlinkyBlue


The solution is simple and obvious.

We revolt against ourselves. Mass suicide. The ultimate revolution.
#29
You're funny, TS. You're more worried about your farting than why she's wishy-washy about you two being together. Yeah...your fart is probably not the issue, dude.
#30
Quote by due 07
And if she thinks farts are funny, then you may as well just break it off.

But farts are funny! They're natures punchline

Just teach yourself to only have silent farts. That reduces the damage
Last edited by Thrashtastic15 at Dec 10, 2011,
#32
Quote by homeless-john
Friend of mine did this to his girlfriend.

They've been together almost 3 years now.

Friend of mine did this to her boyfriend.

They aren't together anymore. Damn sexism!
#33
Quote by Thrashtastic15
But farts are funny! They're natures punchline

Just teach yourself to only have silent farts. That reduces the damage


It so does not reduce the damage. It just reaches the victim more slowly
#34
Farts aren't funny! They're vital for the maintainence of a healthy digestive system.
#36
Quote by homeless-john
Friend of mine did this to his girlfriend.

They've been together almost 3 years now.


Point proven, dutch ovens help relationships.
If you're having girl problems, I feel bad for you son, I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one. Due to dutch ovens.
dirtbag ballet by the bins down the alley
as i walk through the chalet of the shadow of death
everything that you've come to expect


#37
every1 i no farts when dey feel like it. I dnt undrstnd y ppl r shy bout it. jst letit go
#38
Quote by Mistress_Ibanez
It so does not reduce the damage. It just reaches the victim more slowly

It does reduce the damage. There is still a smell probably, but there isn't the sound. You can always bail after the fart if you're worried, or blame it on someone/something else. If you're dating someone and farting is a big deal, just wow. Rethink your priorities girl

There's nothing more satisfying than walking into a big crowd of people when you ate chili last night, dropping a silent one, and watching the crowd slowly disperse from a safe distance.
#39
Quote by Represent
every1 i no farts when dey feel like it. I dnt undrstnd y ppl r shy bout it. jst letit go

i'd give you a high five for that statement if you had only written it like a semi-intelligent person
mugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmug
#40
It's obviously not the farting dude. If that's her problem then she's way to uptight. However, I am dead sure the problem with your relationship which is causing her to be iffy is not due to your flatulence.
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