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#1
A friend/aquaintance of mine has a band that played their first show a few weeks ago. A lot of people were there for support, and they did a really great job for their first time.

My band and his band are both doing the same show in january, and when I went and talked to one of the venue managers, we set up that the order or performance is Other Unimportant Band, My Band, then His Band. His band is a varied style of rock, with mostly covers, he plays drums. My band is a metal/metalcore band with mostly originals, I play guitar and do some singing.

We're both pumped to play the show. But recently he's been starting to get cocky and have a jerky attitude. At school, around a lot of friends, he tells me at least twice a day that, quotes:

"Yeah man, I don't know how much our fans are gonna like your music. They'll mostly be there for us."

"I'm sorry if everyone there leaves when your band starts playing."

"People aren't probably going to be into metal as much as they'd be to hear our band. It's not something they'll get in to."

He says these things with absolutely no hint of humour. When I laugh and tell him we'll have our own fans, he says something like "Haha yeah, okay." As if none of my bandmates have any friends. He's also decided to diss our drummer's skills, even though my band's drummer is way better than he is. It's like he's really trying to put down my band and make it seem as if we're incompetant. (I'm 2 years older than him and more musically inclined/talented, just sharing)

We share a lot of the same friends, and a lot of them are telling me they're coming to see my band. Plus, both of our bands share a guitarist. The guitarist somewhat notices how this guy is acting but doesn't say much about it.

So I guess where I'm going with this is: How should I tell my guitarist friend that his band's drummer is being a jerk, without having him feel torn between the two bands? Should I also just confront the guy in question? And is there anything I can do to make sure that my band has good support and I can show this guy that my band is going to do well at our show?
Quote by willT08
Quote by HowSoonisNow
How was Confucius death metal?
You've clearly never read any Confuscius.

As I wait on the edge of the earth,
I can see the walls being torn down again
Only to be rebuilt in another name,
On a different day
#3
Don't say anything, just have more fans turn up than him and play a better show. He's just having an ego trip and he'll either snap out of it or continue being a wanker and it'll come back and slap him in the face. Either way, you shouldn't give a ****.
Have a good show btw
#4
He plays drums in a cover band. Lolwtf?
What do you get if you drop a piano down a mineshaft?
E--4-
B--4-
G--4-
D--6-
A--6-
E--4-
#5
Quote by captainsnazz
Don't say anything, just have more fans turn up than him and play a better show. He's just having an ego trip and he'll either snap out of it or continue being a wanker and it'll come back and slap him in the face. Either way, you shouldn't give a ****.
Have a good show btw


Thanks! I figured the best thing to do was to just ignore his attitude. I'm looking forward to the show, and our shared guitarist told us the songs in their badn aren't coming together that great right now. I'm friends with all of the other guys, and I want them to do well, I definitely don't want them to put on a mediocre show, but I want the drummer to just get out of his attitude. He's had it for three weeks.
Quote by willT08
Quote by HowSoonisNow
How was Confucius death metal?
You've clearly never read any Confuscius.

As I wait on the edge of the earth,
I can see the walls being torn down again
Only to be rebuilt in another name,
On a different day
#11
It's like I'm really on 4chan.

Say nothing, and humour him when he mocks you. Why start up something which will potentially cause you to lose a member?
Quote by EndTheRapture51
who pays five hundred fucking dollars for a burger
#12
Quote by thePTOD

"I'm sorry if everyone there leaves when your band starts playing."

Then they won't see his band either.
REGGIE
#14
Quote by LeakyFlask
Then they won't see his band either.

I laughed a bit when he said that because I thought of this.
Quote by willT08
Quote by HowSoonisNow
How was Confucius death metal?
You've clearly never read any Confuscius.

As I wait on the edge of the earth,
I can see the walls being torn down again
Only to be rebuilt in another name,
On a different day
#15
This is one of those things where you really need to just choose not to be bothered by him.

If he's a jerk, he's a jerk. Don't argue with him or try to get into it with him. Just go out and put on the show you want to put on.
#17
Quote by LeakyFlask
For some reason, picturing this guy in my head I think of Groose from LoZ: Skyward Sword.


groose playing muse songs on a 4 piece kit just seems too accurate
modes are a social construct
#19
Quote by LeakyFlask
Then they won't see his band either.


Yeah that's what I was thinking.

TS, in life you meet douchebags. Your choices are:

1. Be a douchebag back.

2. Ignore the douchbag.


Your call. When considering your choices remember the rule "nobody likes a douchebag".

If you want a different sort of answer: When bands team up with eachother on the same bill, the point isn't to see who can draw the most fans, to have a competition with eachother. The point is to "share" your fans with other bands - they get to see one band, and they might like the others too. That's the whole deal.

So using this logic a proper answer (if you want to be mature) to the guy is "yes, we have fans too, and we're hoping they'll like your music too so we can draw even bigger crowds together in the future" (or something like that). Or alternatively "we have fans too, so with ours combined we should get audiences twice the size of if we didn't play together".

If he continues to be a douche I refer you to the choice you have above.
And no, Guitar Hero will not help. Even on expert. Really.
Soundcloud
#20
Quote by AlanHB
Yeah that's what I was thinking.

TS, in life you meet douchebags. Your choices are:

1. Be a douchebag back.

2. Ignore the douchbag.


Your call. When considering your choices remember the rule "nobody likes a douchebag".

If you want a different sort of answer: When bands team up with eachother on the same bill, the point isn't to see who can draw the most fans, to have a competition with eachother. The point is to "share" your fans with other bands - they get to see one band, and they might like the others too. That's the whole deal.

So using this logic a proper answer (if you want to be mature) to the guy is "yes, we have fans too, and we're hoping they'll like your music too so we can draw even bigger crowds together in the future" (or something like that). Or alternatively "we have fans too, so with ours combined we should get audiences twice the size of if we didn't play together".

If he continues to be a douche I refer you to the choice you have above.

This. Music has never been a competition in any way. Don't let him make it into one.
I hate my sig
#21
cut him TS, he's poaching your turf, guey
modes are a social construct
#22
As a general rule, an average drummer in a High School cover band should not get high and mighty about anything. And if their fans don't like your music, oh well. You like it, the people playing it like it, that's really what matters at this stage.
#23
rolling stone dissed led zeppelin every time they put out a new album, and they turned out just fine. don't worry about it
#24
"Friend"?
What kind of a friend acts like such a little bitch?
Quote by BlitzkriegAir
when i saw Motorhead, every bass kick shook the place

when they played Overkill at the end i nearly involuntarily shat myself
#25
Quote by Concurssi
"Friend"?
What kind of a friend acts like such a little bitch?


I don't know why I didn't just say 'guy I know.'

I've been writing off every insult he's been saying, because I'm so excited for the gig. Today I was driving with one of my friends and I put in a cd to show her what my band kind of sounded like (Shadows Are Security by As I Lay Dying, don't hate) and she totally loved it and said she'd go. Probably the last person I expected would be into us.

Quote by chriscobonham
As a general rule, an average drummer in a High School cover band should not get high and mighty about anything. And if their fans don't like your music, oh well. You like it, the people playing it like it, that's really what matters at this stage.


This. So much. We've got quite a few of our own metalhead fans coming, which greatly excites me.
Quote by willT08
Quote by HowSoonisNow
How was Confucius death metal?
You've clearly never read any Confuscius.

As I wait on the edge of the earth,
I can see the walls being torn down again
Only to be rebuilt in another name,
On a different day
Last edited by thePTOD at Dec 20, 2011,
#27
..........My dog can whip your dog!" Unfortunately this kind of attitude has been going on for years and is getting progressivly worse. Fewer gigs and more people competing for them. I'm glad I'm getting old.
#28
Quote by captainsnazz
Don't say anything, just have more fans turn up than him and play a better show. He's just having an ego trip and he'll either snap out of it or continue being a wanker and it'll come back and slap him in the face. Either way, you shouldn't give a ****.
Have a good show btw



+1

Definitely! Devote your time to practice and rehearsal! Get more fans than him, play your ass off, and perform in a way that no one will ever forget. He'll shut up real quick when reality sets in.

Not sure how much time you've got, but you can one up him with the cover thing too. I'm guessing you guys are in high school. When I was in high school I thought every cover HAD to be like the original. Not so. I know you do metal but look up Marvin Gaye, "Inner City Blues." After you've watched/listened to that look up John Mayer's studio version. You'll see where I'm going with this.

Find a song that people generally know. Learn it. Then change it to something awesome that you guys wrote yourselves. Keep lyrics and most of the vocal melody. It'd probably be most effective to pick a more poppy type song and then metal the hell out of it. My band does a medley with Gold Digger, Millionaire, Dougie, and about 6 other super pop/hiphop jam/dance songs. I don't give a crap about any of them so me and the bassist just sit on a sick nasty groove. It gets people's attention and THEY REMEMBER! haha!

Other stuff you're probably already doing...(hopefully) If you have video of a past performance, youtube it and post the hell out of it on facebook and myspace (yes some people actually still use it). Get a Reverbnation account going. It'll help with keeping track and managing your promo stuff. Fliers, stickers, posters, etc... You can feature the other bands as small print (that way they can't say you didn't include them). Just make sure your band is remembered. Talk to everyone about it all the time.

Most of all, have fun! None of this matters if you're not having fun.
#30
Quote by bpdeem
+1

Definitely! Devote your time to practice and rehearsal! Get more fans than him, play your ass off, and perform in a way that no one will ever forget. He'll shut up real quick when reality sets in.

Not sure how much time you've got, but you can one up him with the cover thing too. I'm guessing you guys are in high school. When I was in high school I thought every cover HAD to be like the original. Not so. I know you do metal but look up Marvin Gaye, "Inner City Blues." After you've watched/listened to that look up John Mayer's studio version. You'll see where I'm going with this.

Find a song that people generally know. Learn it. Then change it to something awesome that you guys wrote yourselves. Keep lyrics and most of the vocal melody. It'd probably be most effective to pick a more poppy type song and then metal the hell out of it. My band does a medley with Gold Digger, Millionaire, Dougie, and about 6 other super pop/hiphop jam/dance songs. I don't give a crap about any of them so me and the bassist just sit on a sick nasty groove. It gets people's attention and THEY REMEMBER! haha!

Other stuff you're probably already doing...(hopefully) If you have video of a past performance, youtube it and post the hell out of it on facebook and myspace (yes some people actually still use it). Get a Reverbnation account going. It'll help with keeping track and managing your promo stuff. Fliers, stickers, posters, etc... You can feature the other bands as small print (that way they can't say you didn't include them). Just make sure your band is remembered. Talk to everyone about it all the time.

Most of all, have fun! None of this matters if you're not having fun.

Thanks! We've been doing most of that. We had our first gig and it went great I would say, and the jerk's band played, but they didn't do that well, lots of mistakes. Plus the guitarist who was in both of our bands uit their band a week before the show to just be in our band We have another gig coming up on the 18th and I'm really excited for it.

Just to advertise, this is my band Netherwind (I'm the guitarist with long hair)
http://www.facebook.com/NetherwindBand
Youtube http://www.youtube.com/user/NetherwindMusic?blend=1&ob=0
And this is Jonestown, a bigger band we're playing with on the 18th
http://www.facebook.com/Jonestown909
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FqUR4koRr78
Quote by willT08
Quote by HowSoonisNow
How was Confucius death metal?
You've clearly never read any Confuscius.

As I wait on the edge of the earth,
I can see the walls being torn down again
Only to be rebuilt in another name,
On a different day
#31
After the show tally up how many pairs of panties were thrown on stage for each band. Each pair of small are worth 2 pts, med are worth one point, and anything lg or soiled starts deducting points. Highest score wins the gig! If no panties are collected, then you'll just have to have an old fashioned fist fight to determine the winner.

Seriously, who cares? Go on stage and play your ass off. Upstaging them is the best way to shut him up. Or pay people to boo him. Your choice.
Quote by tubetime86
He's obviously pretty young, and I'd guess he's being raised by wolves, or at least humans with the intellectual capacity and compassion of wolves.


You finally made it home, draped in the flag that you fell for.
And so it goes
#32
Quote by jpatan
After the show tally up how many pairs of panties were thrown on stage for each band. Each pair of small are worth 2 pts, med are worth one point, and anything lg or soiled starts deducting points. Highest score wins the gig! If no panties are collected, then you'll just have to have an old fashioned fist fight to determine the winner.

Seriously, who cares? Go on stage and play your ass off. Upstaging them is the best way to shut him up. Or pay people to boo him. Your choice.


We did both, in a sense. We played quite well I would say, and some of our friends did slight heckling of their band. Our other guitarist, named Dan, was the guitarist in their band before, but he quit that band. After their first song, two of our friends screamed, "Where's Dan?!?!" It was hilarious, the singer's mom gave us a death glare but we just smiled and waved.
Quote by willT08
Quote by HowSoonisNow
How was Confucius death metal?
You've clearly never read any Confuscius.

As I wait on the edge of the earth,
I can see the walls being torn down again
Only to be rebuilt in another name,
On a different day
#34
Quote by thePTOD
We did both, in a sense. We played quite well I would say, and some of our friends did slight heckling of their band. Our other guitarist, named Dan, was the guitarist in their band before, but he quit that band. After their first song, two of our friends screamed, "Where's Dan?!?!" It was hilarious, the singer's mom gave us a death glare but we just smiled and waved.


Good to see you resolved the problem in a mature way.
And no, Guitar Hero will not help. Even on expert. Really.
Soundcloud
#36
The guy sounds like an ass.
All I want is for everyone to go to hell...
...It's the last place I was seen before I lost myself



Quote by DisarmGoliath
You can be the deputy llamma of the recordings forum!
#37
Quote by AlanHB
Good to see you resolved the problem in a mature way.

You know it Alan! And he nor I have brought up any negative comments towards either band since then
Quote by willT08
Quote by HowSoonisNow
How was Confucius death metal?
You've clearly never read any Confuscius.

As I wait on the edge of the earth,
I can see the walls being torn down again
Only to be rebuilt in another name,
On a different day
#38
Quote by thePTOD
You know it Alan! And he nor I have brought up any negative comments towards either band since then


Well I wasn't being serious....you just avoided the problem and heckled the other band.

Let's consider that choice you had before as stated by me:

Quote by Me
TS, in life you meet douchebags. Your choices are:

1. Be a douchebag back.

2. Ignore the douchbag.


Your call. When considering your choices remember the rule "nobody likes a douchebag".
And no, Guitar Hero will not help. Even on expert. Really.
Soundcloud
#39
Quote by AlanHB
Well I wasn't being serious....you just avoided the problem and heckled the other band.

Let's consider that choice you had before as stated by me:


I don't think you understood that I knew you were being sarcastic. And since my friend decided to do something of his own accord that I found hilarious doesn't place the blame on me.

Obviously I avoided the problem by never insulting the guy to his face and being nice to him otherwise, sometimes telling him to stop insulting my band, and now neither of us say anything directly bad about the other unless comparing certain things. Is that avoiding the problem enough for ya?
Quote by willT08
Quote by HowSoonisNow
How was Confucius death metal?
You've clearly never read any Confuscius.

As I wait on the edge of the earth,
I can see the walls being torn down again
Only to be rebuilt in another name,
On a different day
#40
Quote by thePTOD
I don't think you understood that I knew you were being sarcastic. And since my friend decided to do something of his own accord that I found hilarious doesn't place the blame on me.

Obviously I avoided the problem by never insulting the guy to his face and being nice to him otherwise, sometimes telling him to stop insulting my band, and now neither of us say anything directly bad about the other unless comparing certain things. Is that avoiding the problem enough for ya?


Sorry, it wasn't made clear that you weren't a part of the whole heckling of the other band thing, it's possible that you took the high route and the other guys took the low.

As for whether the problem's solved, I dunno, see what happens at your next gig and see if you get heckled.
And no, Guitar Hero will not help. Even on expert. Really.
Soundcloud
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