#1
This thread is to write your open letters. Like so,

Dear Legal Education System,

I hope this year I will be able to learn something other than how to make money and disrespect people who do not have as much money.

Sincerely yours
,
A Law student on an education loan.


Dear Professor Dawkins,

I really hope that next person who asks you "What about your blind faith in Science?!" spontaneously combusts.

Sincerely yours
,
A Selfish Gene.

Dear Tool,

I know you put a lot of effort and ethereal meditation into each of your songs but can you just goddamn release the new album already.

Sincerely yours
,
Toolfan.

Dear Vermin Supreme,

Please win.

Sincerely yours
,
Pony.

Post more...
Quote by thanksgiving
I'm coming for you with a castrator!
You sick bastard.



Watch that video below

If this video reaches 1000 views before Christmas, I'll play with my titties on cam.

#4
Dear TS
That chick in your avatar has a nice big ass

Sincerely yours,
UG member
#5
Dear Pagan Poetry,

What is really an object of wonder is that my Avatar is a drawing. A very good one.

Sincerely yours,
Lol, member
Quote by thanksgiving
I'm coming for you with a castrator!
You sick bastard.



Watch that video below

If this video reaches 1000 views before Christmas, I'll play with my titties on cam.

#7
Quote by shattamakar
Dear Pagan Poetry,

What is really an object of wonder is that my Avatar is a drawing. A very good one.

Sincerely yours,
Lol, member


I will need proof of this
#10
I whack to that shit.
Quote by thanksgiving
I'm coming for you with a castrator!
You sick bastard.



Watch that video below

If this video reaches 1000 views before Christmas, I'll play with my titties on cam.

#11
Dear people who use the television for a source of information:

Stop it. What a television anchor says shouldn't be the basis of your political beliefs; rather, you should learn to differentiate between bias and bare-bones information.

Sincerely, me.

Dear United States citizens with extreme political views/ judgments:

Refer to the letter above, and stop looking at ideas for their connotations. Maybe a universal healthcare policy is a socialist ideal, but so what? It might just be a good idea for everyone! See the forest for the trees please.

Sincerely, someone who wishes to take others seriously in debates and willing to listen to those who know their shit.

Dear people who say Wikipedia is an unreliable source of information:

I understand that the articles are edited and created by users like you and I, but it's not just some huge "hey let's **** around" project. Many articles are written with the same care and attention to the right sources as you would do for a well written college essay or encyclopedia article. The only advice is reader beware and look for where the info is coming from, as you would from any other source. Books can be biased/ unreliable too!

Sincerely, me
#12
Dear Pit,

Bring back a certain thread.

Yours sincerely,
Horny Pitmonkey
Quote by thanksgiving
I'm coming for you with a castrator!
You sick bastard.



Watch that video below

If this video reaches 1000 views before Christmas, I'll play with my titties on cam.

#14
Dear [my local MP]

Please vote against ACTA tomorrow. I'm not sure I could cope without Mediafire.

Cal B.


Dear Whoomit,

Check your texts.

Cal.


Dear OP,

The girl in your avatar has a nice ass.
Quote by EndTheRapture51
who pays five hundred fucking dollars for a burger
#16
Dear self-proclaimed intellectual political "experts",

Kindly stop taking every opportunity to blabber on for hours about your arrogant, self righteous, ignorant, opinionated horse shit. I do not care if you think you know what you are talking about. I do not care if I do not know what I am talking about. I do not care about politics at all. Nobody does, except twats like you. Every "-ism" is just as bad as the last.

Regards,

Mr. T. Roll.
I shall grant you three wishes.

None of which will work.


Does the above post enrage, offend or confuse you?

Good.


I like my women how I like my guitars. Curvy and like it when I finger them.
#17
Quote by VillainousLatin
Dear Brain

Please focus on homework and stop making me check UG every god damn minute.

Sincerely yours,
A concerned student.



Dear concerned student



Sincerely yours,
Brain
#19
Dear Woody ID Teacher:

There is no conceivable way that you expect us to know this shit the SECOND time we see you. I'm starting to believe that you are only a teacher so you can "Wield your red pen" as you so aptly put it.

Sincerely, everyone that sits in the 2 back rows
Quote by Butt Rayge
Pretty sure Jesus was decaffeinated.


I'm just a hedonist without happiness
#20
Dear money,

come to me so i can buy all the albums on this gigantic list im about to write

sincerely, wilhelm
#21
Dear Peter Doherty

The last demo of a song I heard on your official site is ****ing horrible. Scrap it, and most of all, never do any collaboration with the girl who's singing. The only collaboration you should with her is when you strangle her to death. And after that, go back to write some good music as you've done before

Sincerely Peter
-------------------------
Dear Tom Waits

Come to Roskilde

Sincerely Peter
------------------------------
Dear John Frusciante

Come to Roskilde.

Sincerely Peter.
---------------------------------
Dear Bruce Springsteen

Cancel your gig at Roskilde this summer

Sincerely Peter
sometimes I see us in a cymbal splash or in the sound of a car crash
Last edited by JohnnyGenzale at Jan 25, 2012,
#22
dear eggmond


eggmond
ಠ_ಠ
<|>
/ω\



Tell me what nation on this earth, was not born of tragedy-Primordial
#24
Dear high school bullies:
Just try to f*ck with me now. You wouldn't even recognize me now I've gotten so buff.

Sincerely: The former skinny guy you f*cked with for all those years.
#25
Dear Incubus,

You broke my loyal fan-boy heart with your last album which was a shit and a quarter.

Sincerely,
Bella.
Quote by thanksgiving
I'm coming for you with a castrator!
You sick bastard.



Watch that video below

If this video reaches 1000 views before Christmas, I'll play with my titties on cam.

#26
Dear Iron Maiden: Please, please make a new album and don't ever quit!

Yours sincerly,
Iron Maiden's biggest fan.

Dear Guitar contests I've entered so far: Please pick me. I want that ESP!

Yours sincerly,
UG'er who is sick of his strat copy.
"You're not hardcore unless you live hardcore"
#27
Dear Yngwie,

Please go on a diet.

Very sincerely,
The chair you're sitting on.


Dear everything,

fuck you.

Definitely not yours,
Ali.