hey im making a band with some friends and i dont really know if my view on how to aproach it is correct i dont want to seem like a little bitch to them but in my eyes we should all sit down have our amps sort of low and figure out a song one of us has written or a song thats been writeen and do it step by step. randomly jamming is fun but is that how songs are made by abnds does it just happen should i just not give a **** and do whatever because i feel like with that attitude nothing will get done please let me know?
Whatever works for you. Generally jamming will give great ideas but it'll never turn into anything unless you stop the jam and start working on some cool stuff that came out of it. It's unlikely to be spontaneous either.
Just pick some cool riffs, throw them in the group, decide which one works best for you guys and start adding the rest. And work at one or two songs at time so you don't get stuck in a huge mess of new ideas and songs which never really have been completed.

Also, respect the input from other band members and compromise if needed.
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see, as guitarist and vocalist i come up with the vocals and guitar. then my bassist and drummer come along and do whatever. my bassist comes up with some pretty awesome bass lines
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Well, technically it could be done, but only in the same way that you could change a cat into a hamburger. It's an unpleasant process, and nobody is happy with the result.
There's 3 main ways my bands have done it:

1. Someone writes a song, and everybody else learns it.
2. Someone comes to practice with a riff, and shows it to everyone. Songwriting commences from there with everybodys input.
3. Jam, get a good thing going. It's a lot easier to turn a jam into a song than you would think.

The first way (IMO) is the worst way. Only one person has control over the direction of the song. It's boring for the other people to learn. Also the other people don't have anything to be proud of, because they haven't done anything.
Well in my band, i basically come up with everything, i play lead and sing, the guitarist plays what i come up with and the same goes for the bass player, so the band is pretty much me and the drummer who's awesome. To come up with songs, sometimes i just make up sounds in my head that sounds cool then i try to find the melody with my guitar. That's usually how it begins. Other times, when i just sit around and play, i can make up some cool riffs, so the only real recomendation i have is to let the guitarist(s) come up with the basics for the song, and then take it from there.
I've used two approaches:
1: Someone comes to practice with a song written (sometimes recorded). They teach it to the band, who rehearse it and then start to offer their input. You MUST be open to criticism if you do it this way. Although the person who wrote the song has ultimate control, everyone can offer their ideas on how to change it.
2: Start with a riff and work up. Everyone needs to be focused and adaptable, and again, you need to be able to take it if people don't like your ideas. Ideally, one or two members of the band should write the lyrics after the bulk of the song is written
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Wrong forum. Do what works for you and your band mates. There are no hard and fast rules except to be patient and open-minded.