#1
I have almost everything the way I want it, except for a bridge (not posted). Anyway, thoughts on what I have so far please.

"War Within My Soul"

I've wandered in this desert years untold
Past oases so brown and cold
I never find the water I seek
Cracked lips and aching gut forever plague me
When and where can I find relief?
Sweet relief

Chorus:
War within my soul
Never-ending strife
War within my soul
Good or evil, will I ever be whole?

Into the windswept tundra, I go
Through the land of snow and ice
The sun is hidden behind the clouds
And disease killed so many
The world cold embraces them like a grave
Final grave


(Chorus)

(Bridge will be here.)

They said the world was dying
And all the people were crying
The end came so quickly
No one saw it at all
And so ends the war within my soul
#2
You have a very unique wrighting style that somewhat reminds me of john mayer, you'll go far friend!
"When the power of love over comes the love of power the world will know peace."
~Jimi Hendrix
#3
Quote by JakePlaysGuitar
You have a very unique wrighting style that somewhat reminds me of john mayer, you'll go far friend!

Huh, guess I never thought it that way. This is kind of one of those songs with a heavy chorus and softer verse, so I never really equated it with Mayer's style. Thanks!
#4
I don't know why it made me think of mayer, it just has a nice blues feel to it (even if it isn't meant to be like that lol) I guess what mainly put him in my head was his song heartbreak warfare but idk. Either way this is an outstanding piece my friend!!
"When the power of love over comes the love of power the world will know peace."
~Jimi Hendrix
#6
I like the contrasting sides to both versus showing the different struggles people can face in therri lives. Our lives are constantly changing shifting back and forth like climate changes and I think you graspped that concept very well. Or at least thats the messaage I gathered from it.
You are a good style and good consistency keep it up.

I have a song written on a forum, always looking for someone to critique me

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1542170