#1
On the back of Incitatus,
A birthday gift from father,
She trotted summer paths.
The steps became louder.

Cleaning a saddle,
And perspiring slow
Toward the wood I gazed
The tree limbs bowed.

Out from the woods
Under the branches came
A girl and her horse
And the sounds of reigns-
Sights of reigns…

My protruding veins,
Covered with dirt,
Facing the sun,
Fixing to my eyes
Which turned from Caligula’s dirty politics
To all those who gallop with love!

She leaped from the saddle
And was running to eat
Looking lovely as hell
Burning earth's virgin's feet.

So she left me in the barn
To feed chow to her gift
But where is the responsibility
In all of us and this?

Notes
Incitatus: Roman Emperor Caligula’s horse who was given a lavish stable and who may have been appointed as a state official by his owner.
Quote by ottoavist

i suppose there's a chance
i'm just a litte too shallow to consider
that maybe i've been a little more eager
each day to wake up and take a shower
brush my teeth and smile for the mirror
Last edited by freshtunes at Mar 24, 2012,
#2
Quote by freshtunes
On the back of Incitatus, Could change "on the back" to something more dramatic for a more compelliong opening line
A birthday gift from father,
She trotted along summer paths.
The steps became louder.

Cleaning a saddle,
And perspiring slow
Toward the wood I gazed
The tree limbs bowed.

Out from the woods
Under the branches came
A girl and her horse
And the sounds of reigns-
Sights of reigns…
liked these 2 verses
My protruding veins,
Covered with dirt,
Facing the sun,
Fixing to my eyes
Which turned from Caligula’s dirty politics
To all those who gallop with love! These two lines seem a bit cluttered

She leaped from the saddle
And was running to eat
Looking lovely as hell Maybe a better simile that "lovely as hell" sounds like something from bill and ted which is totally bogus
Burning earth's virgin's feet.

So she left me in the barn
To feed chow to her gift
But where is the responsibility
In all of us and this?
good last 2 lines to wrap it all up

I liked it though, kind of simple but a good read