#1
meh. an off mood. trying something different.

cryjerking and chestheaving against speechless teeth
muted molars barrack silence in the gumgaps
cold chattering the only sound, a scattering tremolo trill
pitchless sighs empty breaths
swallong whole holes of air down a useless throat
coated with physiofacts like sludging mucous
uvula gallows pole suffering from tonsilaudience
mechanical tongue labeled 'for digestive use only'
no caressing flutters are climbing from a teeming larynx
grappling their way to peaks of pain and wisdom
no pair of lips is licking an inhale to softly slip 'you're beautiful'
all i can do is tip your chin up and kiss you
and put more words into that kiss than exist in language
so i scribble and i scrabble lines of devotion and emotion
because i'll never be able to murmur 'i love you'
the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones that never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn


#2
You might want to check it for spelling errors, haha. Other than that, it's pretty good. I didn't dislike anything besides the spelling errors. (I'm a spelling nazi )
#3
i'm sorry but i cannot detect a single spelling error.
the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones that never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn


#4
Quote by Cobrevolution

swallong whole holes of air down a useless throat

I assume you meant swallowing. "Swallong" isn't even in the dictionary; I checked.

Quote by Cobrevolution
coated with physiofacts like sludging mucous

Mucous implies something that secretes or contains mucus. (In other words, mucous is an adjective.) So, I assume you meant mucus.
Last edited by crazysam23_Atax at Mar 26, 2012,
#5
duly noted. lack of sleep prevails and embarrasses me again.
the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones that never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn