#1
A story regarding yourself that I will think is cool, and will make me want to be your bro.

inb4 arrow to the knee
RIP Tom Searle.
#5
^ Greatest story right there.
Quote by slapsymcdougal
I'm cockblocked regularly by my appearance and personality.
#7
I had sex today.

I also just ate a tonne of chicken schnitzel. Schnitzel is awesome.
PPPPPPPOSTFINDER
#9
I went to work today but I was tired 'cause I stayed up watching Digimon even though mummy said I wasn't allowed to but I did it anyway but there was no ice-cream to eat
#10
Well, 'twas a dark and stormy night...
...Stapling helium to penguins since 1949.
#13
Quote by WholeLottaIzzy
Anyone who uses the word bro needs to be shot several times.


What about people with plosive pronunciation issues who review professional athletes?
...Stapling helium to penguins since 1949.
#14
Quote by WholeLottaIzzy
Anyone who uses the word bro needs to be shot several times.


Quote by GLP_Arclite
Pooping is well good though, to be fair.


I've got a handle on the fiction.

I'm losing my grip, 'cos I'm losing my fingers.
#15
Quote by Todd Hart
What about people with plosive pronunciation issues who review professional athletes?

Speech impediment, they should have been drowned at birth anyway.
#16
One time, there was this slut. I scored. It was cool.
Quote by Diemon Dave
Don't go ninjerin nobody don't need ninjerin'
#17
Quote by WholeLottaIzzy
Speech impediment, they should have been drowned at birth anyway.


Maybe they're from Cork. Would explain the speech issue and the tenacity with regards to drowning.
...Stapling helium to penguins since 1949.
#18
Quote by WholeLottaIzzy
Anyone who uses the word bro needs to be shot several times.

C'mon bro, chill
Quote by WCPhils
My prayers are with you and your balls TS


Quote by jetfuel495
I ran out of chicken nuggets.

When will this misery end.
#19
Now, this is the story all about how
My life got flipped-turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute
Just sit right there
I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel Air

In west Philadelphia born and raised
On the playground was where I spent most of my days
Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool
And all shootin some b-ball outside of school
When a couple of guys
Who were up to no good
Startin making trouble in my neighborhood
I got in one little fight and my mom got scared
She said 'You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air'

I begged and pleaded with her day after day
But she packed my suite case and sent me on my way
She gave me a kiss and then she gave me my ticket.
I put my walkman on and said, 'I might as well kick it'.

First class, yo this is bad
Drinking orange juice out of a champagne glass.
Is this what the people of Bel-Air living like?
Hmmmmm this might be alright.

But wait, I hear the prissy, booze, whine, all that
Is this the type of place that they should send this cool cat?
I don't think so
I'll see when I get there
I hope they're prepared for the prince of Bel-Air

Well uh, the plane landed and when I came out
There was a dude who looked like a cop standing there with my name out
I ain't trying to get arrested yet.
I just got here!
I sprang with the quickness, like lightening disappeared

I whistled for a cab and when it came near
The license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror
If anything I can say is that this cab was rare
But I thought 'Man forget it' - 'Yo home to Bel Air'

I pulled up to the house about seven or eight
And I yelled to the cabbie 'Yo homes smell ya later'
I looked to my kingdom
I was finally there
To sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel Air
Quote by lambofgod127
btw im in hs and im almost 18 so if u do think she was flirting with me dont say that its wrong im almost a grown man.




༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽ WE ARE ROB ༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽
#20
I got pulled over for going twice the speed limit a couple weeks ago. I talked my way out of a ticket with only one word.
#21
Quote by The_Casinator
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Th3KFUc-MFM

I listened to this while studying today. Does that make me cool enough?


Shit, just kidding. I'm so cool, people have to survive an elaborate hazing program to -maybe- be able to chill with me.



I haven't listened to that song since they were releasing it on a radio webcast from their bedroom...

Don't think I've listened to much D'n'B/Dubstep since. Went back to Rock... it's homely here.
#22
Quote by MrKyran
I haven't listened to that song since they were releasing it on a radio webcast from their bedroom...

Don't think I've listened to much D'n'B/Dubstep since. Went back to Rock... it's homely here.


This, hands down, is the most super cool story in this thread, bro.
#23
Once there was a little douchebag from New Zealand. His name was MH400. He was basically a stereotypical kiwi, but even more annoying, if that is possible. He was known for making horrible threads when he was bored, which he incorrectly believed were hilarious.

One day everyone got fed up with his crappy threads so they prayed to Poseidon and he caused another earthquake in New Zealand, but this time it only destroyed MH400's house. Now homeless, he had to live in the public library (so that little idiot could still post stupid threads).

While living at the library, MH400 was kidnapped by sex trade criminals, who took him to be a sex slave in Bangladesh. MH400 was so ugly and annoying that absolutely no one wanted him as a sex slave. In fact, his kidnappers' boss was so displeased with their poor judgement at kidnapping this little bastard instead of someone decent he had the two of them decapitated and thrown into the ocean.

The crime boss decided that MH400 was too ugly and pathetic to even kill, so they left him in the woods outside of town. The local population of sloth bears quickly found him, and they killed him and devoured his corpse, but he tasted so bad that they died from throwing up too much.

And then everything was pretty good in The Pit after that.
There's no such thing; there never was. Where I am going you cannot follow me now.
#24
Quote by theogonia777
Once there was a little douchebag from New Zealand. His name was MH400. He was basically a stereotypical kiwi, but even more annoying, if that is possible. He was known for making horrible threads when he was bored, which he incorrectly believed were hilarious.

One day everyone got fed up with his crappy threads so they prayed to Poseidon and he caused another earthquake in New Zealand, but this time it only destroyed MH400's house. Now homeless, he had to live in the public library (so that little idiot could still post stupid threads).

While living at the library, MH400 was kidnapped by sex trade criminals, who took him to be a sex slave in Bangladesh. MH400 was so ugly and annoying that absolutely no one wanted him as a sex slave. In fact, his kidnappers' boss was so displeased with their poor judgement at kidnapping this little bastard instead of someone decent he had the two of them decapitated and thrown into the ocean.

The crime boss decided that MH400 was too ugly and pathetic to even kill, so they left him in the woods outside of town. The local population of sloth bears quickly found him, and they killed him and devoured his corpse, but he tasted so bad that they died from throwing up too much.

And then everything was pretty good in The Pit after that.

Oh, snap!
Quote by Diemon Dave
Don't go ninjerin nobody don't need ninjerin'
#25
Quote by Thrill-house
I got pulled over for going twice the speed limit a couple weeks ago. I talked my way out of a ticket with only one word.

blowjob?

that was the word right?
#26
Quote by theogonia777
Once there was a little douchebag from New Zealand. His name was MH400. He was basically a stereotypical kiwi, but even more annoying, if that is possible. He was known for making horrible threads when he was bored, which he incorrectly believed were hilarious.

One day everyone got fed up with his crappy threads so they prayed to Poseidon and he caused another earthquake in New Zealand, but this time it only destroyed MH400's house. Now homeless, he had to live in the public library (so that little idiot could still post stupid threads).

While living at the library, MH400 was kidnapped by sex trade criminals, who took him to be a sex slave in Bangladesh. MH400 was so ugly and annoying that absolutely no one wanted him as a sex slave. In fact, his kidnappers' boss was so displeased with their poor judgement at kidnapping this little bastard instead of someone decent he had the two of them decapitated and thrown into the ocean.

The crime boss decided that MH400 was too ugly and pathetic to even kill, so they left him in the woods outside of town. The local population of sloth bears quickly found him, and they killed him and devoured his corpse, but he tasted so bad that they died from throwing up too much.

And then everything was pretty good in The Pit after that.

I'm okay with this.
#28
Quote by theogonia777
Once there was a little douchebag from New Zealand. His name was MH400. He was basically a stereotypical kiwi, but even more annoying, if that is possible. He was known for making horrible threads when he was bored, which he incorrectly believed were hilarious.

One day everyone got fed up with his crappy threads so they prayed to Poseidon and he caused another earthquake in New Zealand, but this time it only destroyed MH400's house. Now homeless, he had to live in the public library (so that little idiot could still post stupid threads).

While living at the library, MH400 was kidnapped by sex trade criminals, who took him to be a sex slave in Bangladesh. MH400 was so ugly and annoying that absolutely no one wanted him as a sex slave. In fact, his kidnappers' boss was so displeased with their poor judgement at kidnapping this little bastard instead of someone decent he had the two of them decapitated and thrown into the ocean.

The crime boss decided that MH400 was too ugly and pathetic to even kill, so they left him in the woods outside of town. The local population of sloth bears quickly found him, and they killed him and devoured his corpse, but he tasted so bad that they died from throwing up too much.

And then everything was pretty good in The Pit after that.
/thread
ggg1 ggg3

.
#29
This one day I was with my bros, we we're all bro-ing it up. These other group of bros came and started bro-ing it up. I was just like bro we were first so just leave. Was a pretty bro-ish situation.
#31
Quote by theogonia777
Once there was a little douchebag from New Zealand. His name was MH400. He was basically a stereotypical kiwi, but even more annoying, if that is possible. He was known for making horrible threads when he was bored, which he incorrectly believed were hilarious.

One day everyone got fed up with his crappy threads so they prayed to Poseidon and he caused another earthquake in New Zealand, but this time it only destroyed MH400's house. Now homeless, he had to live in the public library (so that little idiot could still post stupid threads).

While living at the library, MH400 was kidnapped by sex trade criminals, who took him to be a sex slave in Bangladesh. MH400 was so ugly and annoying that absolutely no one wanted him as a sex slave. In fact, his kidnappers' boss was so displeased with their poor judgement at kidnapping this little bastard instead of someone decent he had the two of them decapitated and thrown into the ocean.

The crime boss decided that MH400 was too ugly and pathetic to even kill, so they left him in the woods outside of town. The local population of sloth bears quickly found him, and they killed him and devoured his corpse, but he tasted so bad that they died from throwing up too much.

And then everything was pretty good in The Pit after that.


I had friends die in the earthquakes, but oh well.

I really really want to sig this.

You have issues, btw
RIP Tom Searle.