#1
I
They say that you can really hurt
yourself if you don't breathe
out as you come to the surface
after you've deep underwater
for a long while.

II
My therapist says that
I'm really making a lot of progress
lately. In return I
asked him how long she
figured I could hold
my breathe.

III
I sent her an email today.
Bubbles rise pretty fast,
did you know that?
Last edited by JustRooster at Mar 28, 2012,
#2
I quite like it, just reading without any rhythmic sense.
I would change out email for letter, it sounds a bit more respectable.
But hey, it's your stuff.

Just a little thing:
As a verb, it's spelled breathe. ex: I breathe, you breathe, etc.
As a noun, it's spelled breath. ex: Hold my breath.
Last edited by Italikz at Mar 27, 2012,
#3
Ah, thanks for the typo catch! And I thought about changing it to letter, but it wouldn't be as true to life. Thanks!