tottsk1
Registered User
Join date: Oct 2010
729 IQ
#1
Would need some advice on this song i began to write yesterday. I like the first and the second riff but im not 100% sure if the riffs at 26-42 are good enough. Would be nice with some opinions and if someone wants to collab i would be happy to help u out with ur stuff.
Attachments:
shit.gp5
Ometh
UG Addict
Join date: Oct 2009
3,913 IQ
#2
This is pretty average metalcore with some quirky little fills. I dig the riffs you mentioned tbh, but the breakdown is dreadful, remove it. I can work a bit on the drums if you want to too.

EDIT: You're Swedish and you don't write awesome Death Metal? Shame on you
Quote by slapsymcdougal
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Last edited by Ometh at Sep 26, 2012,
EpiExplorer
orsonfacenospace
Join date: May 2008
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#3
It doesn't start with much energy, and it sort of drags on. Needs some pacing, and perhaps try switching up the scales used.

And this:

You're Swedish and you don't write awesome Death Metal? Shame on you
o()o

Quote by JamSessionFreak
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xbitmetal
Registered User
Join date: Aug 2009
289 IQ
#4
Sounds like lowest string fap to me and random fills. Like bar 24 wtf? And the short breakdown is not good.
tottsk1
Registered User
Join date: Oct 2010
729 IQ
#5
Quote by Ometh
This is pretty average metalcore with some quirky little fills. I dig the riffs you mentioned tbh, but the breakdown is dreadful, remove it. I can work a bit on the drums if you want to too.

EDIT: You're Swedish and you don't write awesome Death Metal? Shame on you


Would be really nice if help me out with the drums, i made them in a hurry.

Im actually pretty influenced by swedish melodic death metal, i don't think metalcore would have sounded the same without bands like At The Gates and In Flames etc. The older metalcore bands was really influenced by The Gothenburg sound i believe.
tottsk1
Registered User
Join date: Oct 2010
729 IQ
#6
Quote by xbitmetal
Sounds like lowest string fap to me and random fills. Like bar 24 wtf? And the short breakdown is not good.


U mean the pinch harmonic sounds weird? I kinda like it actually, sounds a lot better if u actually play it.
tottsk1
Registered User
Join date: Oct 2010
729 IQ
#7
I've updated the song and added some new riffs and highered the bpm a bit. What do u guys think? No breakdown hatin' plz
Attachments:
shit.gp5
Ometh
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Join date: Oct 2009
3,913 IQ
#8
Quote by tottsk1
No breakdown hatin' plz

I can't resist the urge


It's the worse part of the song by far, and I don't even dig the slide riff. It just seems you run out of ideas so you added something so kiddies could flail their arms around.
This song already has a pseudo djent flavour to it, so if I were you I'd take it in that direction and remove the breakdown completely.
Quote by slapsymcdougal
I'm cockblocked regularly by my appearance and personality.
tottsk1
Registered User
Join date: Oct 2010
729 IQ
#9
Quote by Ometh
I can't resist the urge


It's the worse part of the song by far, and I don't even dig the slide riff. It just seems you run out of ideas so you added something so kiddies could flail their arms around.
This song already has a pseudo djent flavour to it, so if I were you I'd take it in that direction and remove the breakdown completely.


I knew u couldn't resist :P

I know the slide riff sounds a bit forced but i will see how it sounds recorded, cus that's all that matters. I've listened so much on I The Breather the last months so i couldn't resist to write that breakdown
Ometh
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Join date: Oct 2009
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#10
Quote by tottsk1
I knew u couldn't resist :P

I know the slide riff sounds a bit forced but i will see how it sounds recorded, cus that's all that matters. I've listened so much on I The Breather the last months so i couldn't resist to write that breakdown

If you want the breakdown that bad you could always try some polymetric/polyrhythmic stuff with it. It'd make it a bit more interesting
Quote by slapsymcdougal
I'm cockblocked regularly by my appearance and personality.
tottsk1
Registered User
Join date: Oct 2010
729 IQ
#11
I'm a bit confused with the Polyrhythmic thingy. I know u often play it in 3/4 but over a 4/4 time signature. You are not intrested in maybe write a polyrhythmic breakdown in GP or at least give an example of one?
Ometh
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Join date: Oct 2009
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#12
Quote by tottsk1
I'm a bit confused with the Polyrhythmic thingy. I know u often play it in 3/4 but over a 4/4 time signature. You are not intrested in maybe write a polyrhythmic breakdown in GP or at least give an example of one?

A few weeks ago I didn't know either, so frankibo made me a GP file explaining it.
Here you go

EDIT: But if I were you I wouldn't make one as straightfoward as the 3/4 over 4/4 polyrhythmin: probably something harder to follow like 11/8 over 4/4

EDIT2: I posted an example of what I was talking about.
Attachments:
polys.gp5
likethis.gp5
Quote by slapsymcdougal
I'm cockblocked regularly by my appearance and personality.
Last edited by Ometh at Sep 28, 2012,
tottsk1
Registered User
Join date: Oct 2010
729 IQ
#13
THanks, that cleared some questions out. I changed the drums so it plays 12/15 i believe, what do u think? Sorry for being so bad at this
Attachments:
shit1.gp5
EpiExplorer
orsonfacenospace
Join date: May 2008
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#14
Quote by Ometh
A few weeks ago I didn't know either, so frankibo made me a GP file explaining it.
Here you go

EDIT: But if I were you I wouldn't make one as straightfoward as the 3/4 over 4/4 polyrhythmin: probably something harder to follow like 11/8 over 4/4

EDIT2: I posted an example of what I was talking about.



That ending is amazing.
o()o

Quote by JamSessionFreak
yes every night of my entire life i go to bed crying because i wasnt born american
tottsk1
Registered User
Join date: Oct 2010
729 IQ
#15
Quote by EpiExplorer
That ending is amazing.


Shit, i think I got tinnitus from that ^^ Thanks for the example though
frankibo
UG Board King
Join date: May 2007
3,093 IQ
#16
The re use of my lesson brought a tear to my eye...

Lol Ometh have you only just discovered the tremolo bar button? You are raping it at the moment.

Omeths riff was sick.

tottsk1 what you've written is polymetrics not polyrhythmics.
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Colossus
Ometh
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Join date: Oct 2009
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#17
Quote by frankibo
The re use of my lesson brought a tear to my eye...

:3
Quote by frankibo
Lol Ometh have you only just discovered the tremolo bar button? You are raping it at the moment.

I always knew it but I never had a chance to use it in GP because I don't have a guitar with a Floyd irl. I only have one whammy bar and when I jerk it around a sticky liquid comes out after a bit
Quote by slapsymcdougal
I'm cockblocked regularly by my appearance and personality.