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#1
...Do you pay for everything?

It's been a while since I've had a real "date" date, where you have dinner and get to know each other, but when I did I'd usually pay.

It seems like there's this tradition that on dates, the man pays for everything. I like chivalry and all that good stuff, but that shit can get expensive. It's something I don't like, but I try to do reluctantly.
#2
50:50

If she don't like that idea, she can buzz off.
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#3
Well assuming we're doing something fairly standard (a meal or the like) and we both seem actually interested, not just going on a date for fun, then I pay, yeah. Feels right. Plus it weeds out feminazis quickly.
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#4
We usually go back and forth, but first date I pay. If she can't handle it or sees it as some inferiority complex or sexist act instead of me being nice, she can go fuck herself.

I'd pay for all but then they feel bad and want to treat me, so why not? It seems fair to swap turns.

EDIT: We pay for our own shit usually, this is for like a movie date or dinner date or something.
Last edited by Pagan_Poetry at Nov 4, 2012,
#5
For a while and if I like her enough then hopefully we'll both trade off and shit. I don't wanna pay for everything always. But the first few dates, yeah.
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#8
Quote by bradulator
For a while and if I like her enough then hopefully we'll both trade off and shit. I don't wanna pay for everything always. But the first few dates, yeah.

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#9
When it's a date to know each other or whatever, yes, I do pay.
With my girlfriend sometimes I pay everything, sometimes she does and sometimes we pay for our own food/movie tickets/drinks etc...
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#10
Quote by Bob_Sacamano
I don't get the 50:50 thing, why not just pay for whatever your meal costed?


It's kind of just something that happens.

Since guys like to treat the first time, girls will want to keep shit going and the guy interested and thus say "next one's on me!". The guy, in return, will do the same for the third date, and so forth.
#12
You offer and then roll with whatever happens

Quote by Pagan_Poetry
Since guys like to treat the first time, girls will want to keep shit going and the guy interested and thus say "next one's on me!". The guy, in return, will do the same for the third date, and so forth.

This is probably best thing to do if it comes down to it
#13
my first date with my gf we paid for our own meal. now it's a mix of splitting it and taking turns paying in full. though she probably ends up spending more money on things in general
#14
Quote by Pagan_Poetry
It's kind of just something that happens.

Since guys like to treat the first time, girls will want to keep shit going and the guy interested and thus say "next one's on me!". The guy, in return, will do the same for the third date, and so forth.

Oh, I thought it was referring to one meal, like if one person gets something that's $5 and the other $15 then you both pay $10.
#15
Quote by bradulator
For a while and if I like her enough then hopefully we'll both trade off and shit. I don't wanna pay for everything always. But the first few dates, yeah.


Basically this, I try to pay for the first date myself. Movie dates usually end up on us agreeing that I'll pay for the tickets and she'll get sodas/popcorn.
#16
I "accidentally" forget to bring my wallet. Then she has to go back and wash dishes.
If they're not okay with that, I dont want to know them
#17
Quote by Bob_Sacamano
Oh, I thought it was referring to one meal, like if one person gets something that's $5 and the other $15 then you both pay $10.


Oh...

I'm not sure, maybe they did mean that

Nahh, I'm a take-turns kind of guy. I pay this meal, she pays next. I pick her up, she picks me up next time. I bumfuck her, she bumfucks me. It's all good.
#18
Pay for your own shit, in general. An exception would be inviting her to an event or something that's not really that expensive then I'd pay for entrance like a club ticket.
#19
I try to, but sometimes my girlfriend pays because she has a fulltime job. I simply can't afford to pay all the time. We end up doing a fair amount of free things anyway, so...
#21
I don't go on a date.
But boys will be boys and girls have those eyes
that'll cut you to ribbons, sometimes
and all you can do is just wait by the moon
and bleed if it's what she says you ought to do
#22
It usually depends. I always offer. I usually win the little "Oh, you don't have too... are you sure? Well, okay, I suppose." debate. I probably only go dutch like 25% of the time.

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#23
I'd be careful with that one. I was listening to a radio talk show a while back. The subject was 'do poor women date men just so they can pay for their lunch', and I think they had 3 callers who said they do.

Better go half with everything.

Quote by JustRooster
It usually depends. I always offer. I usually win the little "Oh, you don't have too... are you sure? Well, okay, I suppose." debate. I probably only go dutch like 25% of the time.

Lol. Imagine the backfire.
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Last edited by Joshua Garcia at Nov 4, 2012,
#24
Quote by Joshua Garcia
I'd be careful with that one. I was listening to a radio talk show a while back. The subject was 'do poor women date men just so they can pay for their lunch', and I think they had 3 callers who said they do.

Better go half with everything.
God, seriously I worry about that. I'm pretty sure I've had at least one girl do that to me. What's worse is that I've had more success with girls I just went 50:50 with.
#25
I always feel obligated to pay for things.

Hell, I just bought four people movie tickets and we watched a movie. I said it was on me.


I also bought 5 people burgers, and it was on me again. But it's worth it. I like making people happy
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#27
>implying i've ever been on a date

lol madcap u so cray
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#28
From my little experience, and from talking about this stuff with friends, usually whoever invited the other pays all or the majority of the bill (for the first few dates anyways, until some sorta routine is worked out). E.g. Guy asks girl out for dinner, therefore he pays; girl asks guy out she pays, although if the guy drinks 10 beers while on date, he should pay for those etc.
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#29
Quote by ihartfood
I always pay. none of this 50:50 bullshit. dominant sex must assert itself.

This, except the last bit. I don't necessarily see myself as the dominant sex (lol yeah right jk) but I always pay for everything on a date. I just have to oh society how you pressure me so.
pinga
#30
Quote by magnum1117
With my girlfriend sometimes I pay everything, sometimes she does and sometimes we pay for our own food/movie tickets/drinks etc...


This.

It gets to a point where it doesn't really matter who pays for what. It all works out in the wash.

But, yeah, first few dates, don't be a cad, pick up the tab buddy.
#31
If it's your first date then yes, you pay. If you're boyfriend/girlfriend then it's either 50/50, or whoever's idea it was to go out in the first place who pays. e.g. If you really want to go to a baseball game and your gf doesn't really want to go.. then you're paying.

There are different rules for dating a chick, vs being in a relationship. Girls will LOVE to scream about how dating works, about how there are double standards and about how they can't help that they are hopeless romantics... but they also LOVE when you throw the rules out the window...

It all comes down to the same thing, Chicks are crazy and just want to feel secure in your masculinity. Set your own rules, and show confidence. Yes you have to pay for a first date, but you should only go out with a chick if you liker her enough to pay for her in the first place... Technically if may not be fair and you don't have to like it, but that's the game, and chicks LOVE it when they feel special.

They'll also get pissed at you for the same thing, but that's another story...
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Last edited by Vintage024 at Nov 4, 2012,
#32
I'm astounded how many of you let the woman pay. I feel like this isn't an accurate survey because it's mostly guitards who live in the pit. Is the normal world actually like that? Do women pay?
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#33
Honestly I would prefer to just say 'wanna hang at the beach' or something like that for the first time really and go somewhere free just so I know them better before I pay for something like dinner. That crap is expensive when you're still studying full time and I would hate to have a girl just go to a date for a free meal.
#34
Quote by The Madcap
God, seriously I worry about that. I'm pretty sure I've had at least one girl do that to me. What's worse is that I've had more success with girls I just went 50:50 with.

really?

if you don't have even an inkling that a girl is just using you for a free lunch she's either an incredible actress or you've got bigger problems than worrying about who should pay.

back to your question, if you've asked a girl out, you're paying and you're not making a big deal about it, which it isn't. Its not like the first date has to cost a fortune anyway...

if you want you can make the first one a cheaper lunch type arrangement which lets you be the gentleman and pay, and then for a follow up date go to the movies or something where its more natural for you to each buy your own ticket or whatever. That way it seeds the idea that you're not gonna be fronting up the cash for everything, but its waaay less obvious then paying for 3 meals and then deciding you want to split the 4th.

EDIT:^veeeery good point actually, the first date doesn't have to involve buying anything if you don't want. Even then if you went to the beach, by her an ice cream. It costs you bugger all, but its still a nice gesture.
Last edited by Diamond Dave at Nov 4, 2012,
#35
I usually pay for everything because I love treating my girlfriend and because it makes her feel special.

A lot of the time, though, I'll pay for the meal and she'll cover the tip. (mostly because she carries cash and I usually don't)


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#37
Quote by Alpha_Wolf
I usually pay for everything because I love treating my girlfriend and because it makes her feel special.

A lot of the time, though, I'll pay for the meal and she'll cover the tip. (mostly because she carries cash and I usually don't)
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#38
Quote by Diamond Dave
really?

if you don't have even an inkling that a girl is just using you for a free lunch she's either an incredible actress or you've got bigger problems than worrying about who should pay.

back to your question, if you've asked a girl out, you're paying and you're not making a big deal about it, which it isn't. Its not like the first date has to cost a fortune anyway...

if you want you can make the first one a cheaper lunch type arrangement which lets you be the gentleman and pay, and then for a follow up date go to the movies or something where its more natural for you to each buy your own ticket or whatever. That way it seeds the idea that you're not gonna be fronting up the cash for everything, but its waaay less obvious then paying for 3 meals and then deciding you want to split the 4th.

EDIT:^veeeery good point actually, the first date doesn't have to involve buying anything if you don't want. Even then if you went to the beach, by her an ice cream. It costs you bugger all, but its still a nice gesture.
Lunch works best because you have an out if it goes shitty. You can be like "I've got a lot of shit to do so I gotta run. It was nice seeing you though." Kind of pressure off. All you have to do is rock it for an hour or so.
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i kinda wish we all had a penis and vagina instead of buttholes

i mean no offense to buttholes and poop or anything

Rest in Peace, Troy Davis and Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis and Eric Garner and Mike Brown
#40
yes jsut becesuse I can
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