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edmodo23
Banned
Join date: Sep 2012
50 IQ
#1
So basically, i'm in a metalcore band, but we arent very good. Our bassist is fat with no stage presence, and he is a dick to everyone, not to mention he sucks at bass and plays a right handed bass even though he's left handed. We want to kick him out but he is our source for free food, so we have decided to keep him. He also gets up to "take a dump" in the middle of practice sessions, but we have recently realized he was lying, after our vocalist walked in on him masturbating in my bathroom.

We also have a rhythm guitarist with a cheep $150 guitar who tries to do crabcore, and his timing is so bad he always throws the band off. Not to mention during breakdowns he tries to solo off and it sucks major ass. He always gets mad at me because the riffs I write are too hard for him, so much to the point that he just cases his guitar and goes in the other room and complains about me.

I really think our band will go somewhere, but I really want to get through these problems, I want us to get along. Any advice?
Metasponge
Rather absorbent.
Join date: Aug 2010
10 IQ
#2
Quote by edmodo23
So basically, i'm in a metalcore band, but we arent very good. Our bassist is fat with no stage presence, and he is a dick to everyone, not to mention he sucks at bass and plays a right handed bass even though he's left handed. We want to kick him out but he is our source for free food, so we have decided to keep him. He also gets up to "take a dump" in the middle of practice sessions, but we have recently realized he was lying, after our vocalist walked in on him masturbating in my bathroom.







but nah, if you really have this much to complain about, what makes you think you can go somewhere as a band? How long have you been a band so far?
Last edited by Metasponge at Dec 10, 2012,
edmodo23
Banned
Join date: Sep 2012
50 IQ
#3
Quote by Metasponge





but nah, if you really have this much to complain about, what makes you think you can go somewhere as a band? How long have you been a band so far?

March 2011
adamgur96
Not caring no more
Join date: Apr 2011
668 IQ
#5
It'll be fine, kindergarten is always hard.
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theogonia777
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Join date: Jun 2009
230 IQ
#6
Quote by edmodo23
So basically, i'm in a metalcore band, but we arent very good... I really think our band will go somewhere


You aren't very good, but you think your band will go somewhere?

But yeah, if you are having problems like that, kick those guys to the curb. There is clearly a conflict in terms of musical style, ability, and personality, and with these you will never be able to get anything done, even just for fun.
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Shut the mother#%$& up, $^%got. You have a #$%^ing terrible muther&@$#ing taste in %#$@ing music, @&%$ing movies and %&$#ing video games. Every time I see you on the forums, you are always saying something overrated and some $@&#ing sh*t. You are just mother$^@%ing ignorant as a whole.

Get a #%$@ing life or you will get banned for life.


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Read this please.
Neo Evil11
Feminist
Join date: Feb 2006
71 IQ
#7
Wait, so the bassist is fat and goes of for a wank during practice and doesn't shut the door, and you accept this as long as he gives you free food? What kind of freak band are you in? You're like a food prostitute.
Quote by Carmel
I can't believe you are whoring yourself out like that.

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RetroGunslinger
Registered User
Join date: May 2010
100 IQ
#8
Bravo I thoroughly enjoyed reading that, although wtf is crabcore? Does everyone walk around the stage sideways?
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edmodo23
Banned
Join date: Sep 2012
50 IQ
#9
Quote by adamgur96
It'll be fine, kindergarten is always hard.

I'm getting really annoyed by our bassist though, I had to clean the ****ing semen, and he cant play any of the riffs I write so he just plays open notes. I always have to tab it out for him
Also we dont have a drummer, so it is frusterating
edmodo23
Banned
Join date: Sep 2012
50 IQ
#10
Quote by RetroGunslinger
Bravo I thoroughly enjoyed reading that, although wtf is crabcore? Does everyone walk around the stage sideways?

Its when you squat down during a breakdown and bang your head like crazy
adamgur96
Not caring no more
Join date: Apr 2011
668 IQ
#11
Quote by edmodo23
I'm getting really annoyed by our bassist though, I had to clean the ****ing semen, and he cant play any of the riffs I write so he just plays open notes. I always have to tab it out for him
Also we dont have a drummer, so it is frusterating




Quit that shit!

And stop cleaning semen after your fat friend.
I Have An Avant Garde Fetish....
Quote by Gantz92
Im in no way an amateur. I masturbate in public all the time.
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Don't worry, rape will always find a back way in
theogonia777
Miss Kristen
Join date: Jun 2009
230 IQ
#12
Quote by edmodo23
Also we dont have a drummer, so it is frusterating


And "[you] really think [your] band will go somewhere?"
Quote by Hal-Sephira
Shut the mother#%$& up, $^%got. You have a #$%^ing terrible muther&@$#ing taste in %#$@ing music, @&%$ing movies and %&$#ing video games. Every time I see you on the forums, you are always saying something overrated and some $@&#ing sh*t. You are just mother$^@%ing ignorant as a whole.

Get a #%$@ing life or you will get banned for life.


Quote by Arby911
Kristen is very open-minded; believes that everyone is entitled to her opinion...


Quote by NirvanaLuvr16
omg its better than i imagined... so dark and cozy and warm...


Read this please.
Metasponge
Rather absorbent.
Join date: Aug 2010
10 IQ
#14
Quote by edmodo23
I'm getting really annoyed by our bassist though, I had to clean the ****ing semen, and he cant play any of the riffs I write so he just plays open notes. I always have to tab it out for him
Also we dont have a drummer, so it is frusterating


He sounds like a total wanker.


(ba-dum-tss)
Neo Evil11
Feminist
Join date: Feb 2006
71 IQ
#16
Ok the semen thing went too far. He's a troll.
Quote by Carmel
I can't believe you are whoring yourself out like that.

ಠ_ಠ
badfish_lewis
Tab Contributor
Join date: Jan 2012
356 IQ
#18
If you keep going like you guys are you will definitely get signed. I heard that Simple Plan, Good Charlotte and One Direction all had the same problems and then poof they got signed. So don't worry about your fat masturbating bassist or your guitar player who can't play guitar, EMI will make it happen!
crazysam23_Atax
Feuergesicht
Join date: Oct 2009
490 IQ
#19
Quote by edmodo23
I really think our band will go somewhere, but I really want to get through these problems, I want us to get along. Any advice?

Here's my advice. Leave your band. Stay friends with them if you want. But do your own project. Become a solo artists. You can set up a home studio for less than $500. Then, if you wish, put up classifieds and ask people to play riffs that are complicated enough to show their skill but not too complex to play in an impromptu audition.
Last edited by crazysam23_Atax at Dec 10, 2012,
kertets
Banned
Join date: Jan 2012
10 IQ
#20
Quote by kaptink
I think you need to film your practice sessions. So we can understand better...



I love that idea, but don`t film the wanking bit. We know how that shit goes down.
Danjo's Guitar
UG's Math/Physics Major
Join date: Jun 2007
143 IQ
#21
I only had faith in my highschool band because we were all fairly proficient players. It sounds like you guys couldn't be more ****ed.

I get the feeling that you also have more of an ego than you're admitting. You shouldn't be writing everyone's parts for them. You should also be okay with people not playing the parts you wrote. Thats part of maturing as a musician. Its probably just a phase, I used to be like that, but I've grown out of it.

Also, who masturbates at other peoples houses? WTF? Especially when there are a bunch of people around?
edmodo23
Banned
Join date: Sep 2012
50 IQ
#23
Quote by kertets
I love that idea, but don`t film the wanking bit. We know how that shit goes down.

We dont practice again until Saturday
edmodo23
Banned
Join date: Sep 2012
50 IQ
#24
Quote by Danjo's Guitar


Also, who masturbates at other peoples houses? WTF? Especially when there are a bunch of people around?

Our bassist, apperently
EdawMail
UG's Guitarist
Join date: May 2007
185 IQ
#26
Quote by edmodo23

I really think our band will go somewhere


No you won't.

If you have to bitch about them on the internet (albeit the centre of all knowledge known as The Pit), then there's no hope.

Find some new musicians.
whywefight
~I'm not fuckin around~
Join date: Dec 2010
110 IQ
#27
Quote by adamgur96
It'll be fine, kindergarten is always hard.


Quote by edmodo23
I'm getting really annoyed by our bassist though, I had to clean the ****ing semen.....



Everything I said about banning edmodo, I take it all back... this is just way too entertaining..... what else am I going to do on this site with airbrendie gone?
maggot9779
UG's Saint Nicduck
Join date: Jun 2007
61 IQ
#28
Quote by edmodo23
I really think our band will go somewhere, but I really want to get through these problems, I want us to get along. Any advice?


You thought wrong.
Neo Evil11
Feminist
Join date: Feb 2006
71 IQ
#29
Maybe you should slash your wrists and tear your throat out.

When you're dying, you will be crying etcetc.

edit: that was you right with those lyrics?
Quote by Carmel
I can't believe you are whoring yourself out like that.

ಠ_ಠ
ecvMatt
clamper
Join date: Oct 2008
10 IQ
#30
If he masterbated while playing you'd say he has too much stage presence, poor guy can't win. When you gotta rub one out, you just gotta.
Quote by CodChick


Seriously, I'm not a fan of iphones and guitars mixing.
Oyface
**** seagulls
Join date: Apr 2008
145 IQ
#31
Quote by edmodo23
So basically, i'm in a metalcore band

Well son, there's your problem.
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whywefight
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Join date: Dec 2010
110 IQ
#32
Quote by Neo Evil11
Maybe you should slash your wrists and tear your throat out.

When you're dying, you will be crying etcetc.

edit: that was you right with those lyrics?

yes.


true brilliance
RetroGunslinger
Registered User
Join date: May 2010
100 IQ
#33
Quote by edgeyyz


Thats one of the shitest things I've seen/heard for a long time
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whywefight
~I'm not fuckin around~
Join date: Dec 2010
110 IQ
#35
Quote by RetroGunslinger
Thats one of the shitest things I've seen/heard for a long time

Imagine this: imagine a shitty local band sounding exactly like that.


Ready to suck a muffler with me?
damian_91
Registered User
Join date: Apr 2009
223 IQ
#36
Quote by edmodo23
I really think our band will go somewhere

nope
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SidKain
Registered User
Join date: May 2012
10 IQ
#37
No drummer, a bassist who refuses to use his stroking hand on his stage instrument and a guitarist that cant play... Sounds like u just enjoy writing unplayed riffs and cleaning semen!

Troll love!
edgeyyz
I take out the trash
Join date: Oct 2007
30 IQ
#39
Quote by RetroGunslinger
Thats one of the shitest things I've seen/heard for a long time

Pretty much.
edmodo23
Banned
Join date: Sep 2012
50 IQ
#40
Guys, I've thought about it alot, and I decided that I am going to leave the band. But I have no idea how to tell my bros Advice?
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