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#1
Do you think that it's wrong or messed up for a girl or guy to start seeing someone very soon after a break-up?

I personally have never even known people felt that way until recently. Although I've only seen people feel that way about a girl seeing another guy right after a break-up. Not so much the other way around.
#2
I think it can be harmful. But wrong, necessarily? I don't think so.

I've a friend who is intent on breaking up with his GF but is dragging it out because he's afraid to lose sex. He hasn't said that explicitly, but it's pretty obvious what he's doing. Now that, imo, is wrong.
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#3
if the relationship was sincere, then there should be a mourning period.
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#4
idk i feel like it comes down to the person

i myself would be uncomfortable if someone who had just gotten out of a relationship took a sudden interest in me. i'd feel like they were just trying to fill a void.

maybe that's paranoid and judgmental of me, but hey, my paranoia could be just as poisonous to a relationship as ill intent.
#5
There's nothing "wrong" with it, but it can sometimes lead to some dysfunctional situations later on.
#6
I'd say it's fine if you actually have an interest in the other person, and aren't just jumping into it because you are lonely and/or upset.
#8
no noone should date anyone ever


why do they get to be happy and not me


nah i dont care but if it was a long relationship id expect some time before they started dating
#10
Quote by captaincrunk
the bitch ain't dead so why you be mourning?

Another good point.


I guess this is my ultimate view on the matter: If the relationship deserved to be mourned over, then the person will mourn. If not, they will move on. That level varies person to person.
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#11
Not sure; it probably varies by person.

My present "mourning period" (we'll call it that) is at 6.6 years and counting.
#12
Who wants to be in a relationship after just getting out of one?
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#13
My roommates watch this average show called How I Met Your Mother. According to that show, like the day after, and then get back with them, then lead the other person on, then have a one night stand, then get back with the original person again, then meet another. This should take place in about 2 weeks time.

3 months is a good cushion.
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#15
I see nothing wrong with it, but I have been told that I'm detached and cold, so maybe I'm not the best source for this type of info.
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#16
It is usually looked down upon because most people who engage in a new relationship fairly soon after a previous ones are those who are too afraid on their own and therefore go into a relationship for wrong reasons, filling a void so to say.

It's not wrong if you are genuinely interested in the person.


However, it varies. People, MOST of the time, have some emotional baggage and left over from a previous relationship, which is why they usually wait before going into a new one, it's human psychology, and unless you're the exception, I would advise to wait because you're starting a relationship on bad foundation.
Last edited by Aralingh at Jan 11, 2013,
#17
That's disgusting, I don't want to have to deal with that shit at any time let alone in the morning.
#18
It all depends on cultural and social circumstances... some circles of people will call you a monster for that, some won't care.

There's are peculiar situations, for example, people who look for new partners quickly out of fear of loneliness (like jetfuel said, to fill a void). Then there's kinds of malicious "revenge" kind of things, like a girl banging her ex's friend just to spite him. Human relationships are weird.

I guess there is also a difference if the past relationship was serious or simply a "for fun" thing.
Last edited by piratemetalhead at Jan 11, 2013,
#19
A little. Because my girlfriend and I have brOken up dozens of times. Never for more than a month. So it depends on why they broke up, I suppose.
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#20
Have to question the psyche of a person who would nearly immediately jump into a new relationship after ending a significant & long relationship, regardless of gender.
#21
I had a girlfriend one who was a serial monogamist- we got together less than a week after she had broken it off with her ex (I had no idea), then after we broke up she had a new boyfriend in less than a week.
Some people just need to feel loved so who are we to criticise? Other than the fact she was a heartless bitch.... ;P
#23
I don't think there is one answer. I've gotten out of long term relationships that slowly fell apart. By the end, there wasn't much left as far as feelings go. I can understand moving on rather soon after that.
#24
I don't think it's wrong.

At least the breakup occurred before the person started seeing someone else. The usual implication is that the person with the new partner was cheating on their previous partner, but of course that isn't necessarily true.

idk breakups usually suck more for one side than the other and the person who is more affected by the breakup will obviously be more upset if this occurs, but all this is extremely subjective so you can't really say anything about it unless you're directly involved in the relationship
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#25
story time! so my ex girl left me because i got un believably drunk on my dead fathers birthday which is also new years eve. anyways, dumped me because of that, no sympathy for my depression/sorrow/grief didnt accept my apology...ect... immature child(me too for getting drunk lol) .
SO my bass player was dating her in less than two days. bass players amiritelol?
i dont think its wrong TS BUT when its your best friend i think that bass needs to be cracked across both his face....
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#26
No, I wouldn't find it wrong unless one of them is seeing the other's best friend. That's sort of a dick move.

But something I know is a bit ****ed up:

My friend went through a shitty breakup with her boyfriend. She saw nudes of another girl on his phone, sent during the relationship. After that somehow she realized that she was just his "cum dumpster" and she broke up with him. After that he's been sending texts worthy of a TL;DR almost every day wanting her back. Yesterday he found her and told her about the dream he had about ****in a teacher.

This is why you cut all contact after a breakup, Pit.
#28
I don't think it would be a good idea for anyone to engage in a new relationship when he/she is still in grief over a lost one, but I wouldn't say it's morally wrong. It completely depends on the person and the situation how long that period of grief takes though.

The only situation I can think of where I would judge someone on this is when he or she is being inconsiderate of their ex's feelings by engaging in a new relationship within a very short amount of time.
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#29
Quote by eGraham


I've a friend who is intent on breaking up with his GF but is dragging it out because he's afraid to lose sex. He hasn't said that explicitly, but it's pretty obvious what he's doing. Now that, imo, is wrong.


I have a friend in the exact same position, except that he doesn't have sex with his GF and all of his relationship with her is basically built in lies and he doesn't end it because of some stupid reason. I don't know why he lies and hide so much of his life to a lot of people, I'm his best friend and ever since I've known him different people, including family members don't even know half his life. Also he have now started to go out with one girl, which ticks me off because even if you don't feel the same about your current relationship, I think it's wrong to start cheating just because you're a coward and can't end a relationship.

That being said, my ex had a boyfriend about 3 weeks after she broke up with me and to tell the truth, it's what has made it harder for me to move on (also because I'm a bitch) since I don't know if she was cheating on me or she is just quick to get in relationships. I don't know if it's wrong but it could hurt the other person a lot, but then again, I doubt they'd care much about what happens to their ex's (and they shouldn't, really) so it doesn't matter.
Last edited by VillainousLatin at Jan 11, 2013,
#30
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I see nothing wrong with it, but I have been told that I'm detached and cold, so maybe I'm not the best source for this type of info.




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Last edited by OVER9000VIDEOS at Jan 11, 2013,
#31
If someone breaks a relationship and then starts a new one with someone else straight after, it usually means that person has been working towards the new relationship whilst in the previous one. That is wrong.
#32
Quote by karstaag666
If someone breaks a relationship and then starts a new one with someone else straight after, it usually means that person has been working towards the new relationship whilst in the previous one. That is wrong.

I wouldn't say that's necessarily wrong, it depends on how the person handled the situation. If the attraction towards someone else was the reason for the break-up, but the person didn't actually act upon it untill the relationship was ended, then I don't really see a problem with it. There's nothing inherently wrong with falling in love with someone else while you're in a relationship, you can't control something like that.
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#33
well i split up with mine a few months ago cos she slept sleeping round some guys house and saying they were just friends, when we broke up they got together almost immediately.Bitch still rings me when they argue to, as i'd want to know .....
#34
Well she clearly didn't handle that very well. You should tell her that you don't want her to call you, or just ignore her calls if you've already done so. She can't expect you to be there for her whenever it suits her anymore, and you should make that clear to her.
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Last edited by the bartender at Jan 11, 2013,
#35
i did man. she literally wouldn't stop. i just give my phone to someone else now until she gives up, because i can't block numbers on my phone.
#36
Dang. Bitches be crazy.
You who build these altars now

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You must not do it anymore
#38
It isn't wrong to date someone else right after, but it is wrong to start a relationship with someone that's just rebound, especially if they don't know that they're rebound. I've been in a rebound relationship and I knew it was rebound, and it was fun, but it didn't end amicably.
#39
Well it depends how long the initial relationship was and how clean the break-up was. I think someone still needs to take some time to make sure they're not just filling a void. Its unfair to the person you're using, which is why I never took it very far in my case. I felt guilty. It definitely helps you move on, though.
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