#4
Nice voice chap. The song flowed well and felt full enough though I'd like to hear a full band version with a soulful solo. =D
Not over long which is a bonus cause some singer song writer can over do it and the song becomes samey.
This is well written and does not fall into that trap.
#5
Thanks! I have a band and we're probably gonna try and put that song into our setlist.
#7
Being a singer-songwriter myself, it's nice to see more vocal songs like this, as most links are instrumentals here on ultimate guitar.
Let me start by saing that I didn't think the falsetto part was too weird, LOL!
But seriously, you're a very solid singer and you have a pretty unique voice.
As far as the song itself, it sounds good to me, but I wouldn't mind hearing it with a full band arrangement.

Could you visit my thread (the song is an instrumental though; my vocal stuff is on my other YT channel), and maybe leave a comment:
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1584084
#8
Thanks for the critique guys! It feels good to hear that I have an unique voice as that is what every singer should be striving for. I've got so much positive feedback on this one song that I'm probably gonna try to record some of my other acoustic songs as well, might post that if I think it sounds alright!
#9
this is actually really good. I found my way here through a critique of my own work. I was expecting something heavy but this is far from it haha! but seriously it does sound really good. I dont have any complaints or sugguestions expect i suggest you take it to the street. good luck man,
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#10
Wow man, i loved that! Your voice is awesome! What kind of acoustic is that, it has a great tone! And I have to say, seriously, you're one of the better singers ive ever heard on here. I could hear this song on the radio. It had like a touch of darkness to it, which i liked. Great job!
#11
Thanks for the critique!

Quote by awesomo41894
Wow man, i loved that! Your voice is awesome! What kind of acoustic is that, it has a great tone! And I have to say, seriously, you're one of the better singers ive ever heard on here. I could hear this song on the radio. It had like a touch of darkness to it, which i liked. Great job!



Yeah that's kinda what I was going for - a groovy riff with chords that blend other tones in which fit really well to the subject at hand - the realization of how insignificant one can be among billions of people as well as leaders who's been leaders for too long and have become corrupted by it. Its also about not judging too much as your own hands probably got some filth on them.

concerning the guitar - Its a Morgan and we bought it from my dad's friend 10 years ago. At that time we bought it used for approximately 575.75 Euro if I remember correctly so it is not a piece of crap
I really love the tone of this guitar and I think it would be hard for me to find a replacement if it broke.
Last edited by Zerath at Jan 23, 2013,
#12
Dear Zerath
I thought this worked really well. Good song. Delivered with conviction. I'm impressed by the easy way you handle singing and playing simultaneously; looks very natural. The singing is right for song and falsetto was fine. Everything is A1 as it stands, but if you wanted to play with new things, then may be try giving the song more drumming by whacking the strings a harder as the vocals knock points home. I also think your voice is easily good enough to stand the exposure of being unaccompanied for a key phrase or two i.e. experiment with cutting the guitar for a bar. Nice work.
All the best
Phil

PS You asked about the tuning on my piece of music. The guitar is in open d to facilitate slide playing. I used minor chords and minor scale for bits. I also tried the Phrygian (or Spanish) scale which gives a sort of eastern sound to some of the passages (I had to look it up to find out what it was called; it just sounded nice to me).
#13
Quote by CarsickPhil
Dear Zerath
I thought this worked really well. Good song. Delivered with conviction. I'm impressed by the easy way you handle singing and playing simultaneously; looks very natural. The singing is right for song and falsetto was fine. Everything is A1 as it stands, but if you wanted to play with new things, then may be try giving the song more drumming by whacking the strings a harder as the vocals knock points home. I also think your voice is easily good enough to stand the exposure of being unaccompanied for a key phrase or two i.e. experiment with cutting the guitar for a bar. Nice work.
All the best
Phil

PS You asked about the tuning on my piece of music. The guitar is in open d to facilitate slide playing. I used minor chords and minor scale for bits. I also tried the Phrygian (or Spanish) scale which gives a sort of eastern sound to some of the passages (I had to look it up to find out what it was called; it just sounded nice to me).


Thanks for the critique! That's an interesting point, about the strumming. I will definetly play around with accenting the vocal knock points with the guitar. When it comes to singing without the guitar I'm not as confident. Mainly because I generally only sing when holding a guitar, but its a nice thought.

I'm gonna have to check those scales out! I, myself have been fiddling around with alternate tunings like DADGAD and Open G but Open D sounds interesting I must say.
#14
Thanks for the comments in my thread!

I agree with what seems to be the general opinion here, you sing good! The song is solid, I think what makes it stand out a bit are the two chords at the end of each verse, ties the progression together nicely. Good effort!
#15
Wow that was pretty good...
I really want such a powerfull voice as you have.
I would kinda add more instruments to it, a catchy bit struggly drum beat along with a lead guitar who fills up the space in between the verses...
I'm not really an acoustic solo man you know... So get a/your band and you'll sure turn it into an awesome song.


https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1551444
(*6 is my best)

Regards
#16
I liked this song, nice choice of chords. I enjoyed the little falsetto you did (and the rest of the singing, you do have a good strong voice). My favourite parts are the part from 1:32 onwards and the intro. The song reminds me of Led Zeppelin's Babe i'm gonna leave you which is a plus because I love that song haha

C4C? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1584435
#17
Quote by Knackworst1
Wow that was pretty good...
I really want such a powerfull voice as you have.
I would kinda add more instruments to it, a catchy bit struggly drum beat along with a lead guitar who fills up the space in between the verses...
I'm not really an acoustic solo man you know... So get a/your band and you'll sure turn it into an awesome song.


https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1551444
(*6 is my best)

Regards


Although I don't think I possess a particular strong voice its great to hear people say it.

And yes, my band is gonna record an EP this year (if all goes according to plan) and that song will be on it and shall have at least drums and bass added.

Crabman429: To me the falsetto sounds a bit flat in the first half.

I do like the Zeppelin comparision even though I was not influenced by Zeppelin in any way when I wrote this.
Last edited by Zerath at Jan 26, 2013,
#18
I like it.

My only comment would be to see about opening the song up once you have more elements to fill the space. Right now you've got an intro, and then you're basically singing the whole time for the rest of the song. You've got a lot of really nice lyrics and ideas. When adding other elements, you may find appropriate times for the song to breathe, and that will make it easier for your listeners to appreciate the thought and effort that are in your lyrics.

If you wanna take a look at my stuff, it's all right here:
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=30968475#post30968475
#19
i really like it dude you got a really good voice the grit gives it a rough darker feel which i dig, the song is deff catchy and i like the choice of chords u use, although i agree with what the others said it could use some other dynamics maybe a few pauses to let the song flow and breath, i enjoyed it and look forward to whatever else u put out,
heres a demo my band put out i would appreciate ur crit!
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1585377
#20
Thanks guys! I'm considering adding some sort of instrumental bridge and/or something inbetween certain parts, just gotta play around with it, will crit!
#21
Hey man, thanks for the comment on my song! I enjoyed this one. The guitar playing was great, and the verses were really catchy. I felt like the vocal melody was maybe a little uninspired, but I really liked that little falsetto bit. The arrangement also feels like it could use a bit more of a dynamic change at some point, it feels like it's all kind of coasting along on the same level if that makes any sense. You have a nice voice though, and its nice to see someone post a completed song with vocals and everything in here for once.
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