unicornicopia
Registered User
Join date: Jan 2011
544 IQ
#1
I remember once you hosted
a dinner party
all your loved ones
and your futures and your might'ves
were all gathered round
eating god knows how many courses
and drinking from a pricy bottle of
Chateau Margaux

And you looked at me
as if anything I told you would've
been the best news you'd heard
in your life

I'd been asked to prepare a toast
having two possible options
one: to say what was expected
or
two: to say would should be said

but how you tell someone,
look them in their
lovely adoring face and tell them,
"your expensive wine
still tastes like shit"
the bartender
UG's biology teacher
Join date: Nov 2009
429 IQ
#2
Well done . There's a few typo's or omittings here and there, so you might wanna check that, but apart from that it's a good piece.
You who build these altars now

To sacrifice these children
You must not do it anymore
Nilchii
Registered User
Join date: Feb 2009
867 IQ
#3
I like
to think that line breaks in
poetry ought
to serve some artistic
purpose or
at least give


some kind of clue as
to how

the

poet means for his
poem to be read. Thank
you for

pointing out the

error in
my delusion.

Oh, and your joke's very droll.
Nothing to see here. Move along.
Last edited by Nilchii at Feb 8, 2013,
unicornicopia
Registered User
Join date: Jan 2011
544 IQ
#6
Line breaks are my weaker point always. Should probably edit stuff before I post it but I never do. Oh well.