Thought you all might find this a bit... amusing:

Richard Clayderman is a famed French pianist who has released multiple albums and compilations of some of the most beauteous music ever composed. His newest stunt, put together by his record company and the London zoo, however, have some people scratching their collective heads.

This past Thursday, Mr. Clayderman played his music to a unique audience: tortoises. Why exactly did he do this? According to the Associated Press, it was "an attempt to put the reptiles in the mood to mate."

He serenaded the animals with "Ballade pour Adeline," one of his most famous pieces, then "Chariots of Fire." Unfortunately for the tortoise race, the music "did little to lift their spirits," and their interest only piqued "when zookeepers brought them some carrots."

More here
Too bad tortoises don't have ears..
How do you make a signature? Is this a signature? Sig?.... Nature?..... Sigmund Freud?...... Nature Valley?.... Sigmund Fraud?..... Frankie Valli?.... ah, $!*@ it...
I read this as

Zoo Hires Famed Pianist to Sexually Abuse Tortoises
~don't finkdinkle when ur supposed to be dimpdickin~
Whatever rocks their van
I Have An Avant Garde Fetish....
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Im in no way an amateur. I masturbate in public all the time.
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Of course.
dirtbag ballet by the bins down the alley
as i walk through the chalet of the shadow of death
everything that you've come to expect

I'd be pretty sexually aroused too if I had a nice big carrot inside me.
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You lost me at "Lubricate."

I'm raw, like nature. Nature boy. Big jungle leaves are my cum rags.

Sometimes I fuck a bamboo shoot.

There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
If all it takes is carrots, what made them think they needed a pianist?
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Void is a wanker that's why

I'm more amused by the aggressive advertising of aggressive conservative t-shirts and bumper stickers.
Wouldn't it have been cheaper to just set up some speakers? I guess they have trouble trying to keep them from going extinct and stuff though, so whatever works.
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what specs is your pc? like how much ram?

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3 ram, nice

This is bollocks, he say's his dog sit's by the piano - I don't know about you guys but when I'm rocking wood I don't feel the need to sit by a piano - how is that an example of sexual arousal in animals
Wow...so basically, they paid this guy a wad of cash to play the piano, in the hopes that it would arouse the tortoises. He probably was laughing his ass off all the way to the bank.