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#1
whats up dudes!

dont know if this is the right place to post it,
but yeah,
just started a heavy metal review site.....
will be reviewing any Death/Thrash/Black/Heavy metal bands...

im not very into Deathcore, Metalcore etc and havent heard much of it, so wont be able to review those types of bands very accurately.
anyways,
if you would like your band to be reviewed for free, please send me the following info via email with the subject line: REVIEW WANTED: BAND NAME... bear in mind if this is not followed the email will most likely get deleted.

Band Name:

Genre:

Short Bio: (history, about the band, background, members, where ur from all that shit)

Influences:

Release Info (important!): is it an album/ep? is there a theme or concept? how many songs? LENGTH? other useful info.

Please include lyrics to the songs. (themes if possible?)

Also please include your band logo, album art, and any pictures of the band itself... this always makes it look cool!


So basically, what i would require from you is a band press kit (if you have one, if not just copy paste this form.)

anyways, there is no specific order to how i'll be reviewing, i guess the ones i like most will be reviewed quicker as it'll be easier for me to write one up for you. and yeah please keep in mind that the more info you provide, the more detailed and accurate the review will be.

Please bear in mind i'm doing this in my spare time, and it might take a while for me to post the reviews, but i'll try my best to do em quick, and i will reply back to your email myself with the review link, so please dont email me asking if i've reviewed your stuff yet, just wait for the reply, i will let you know.

anyways, here's a link to the site...

http://brutalwords.blogspot.com/

Thanks a lot!
Look forward to hearing some ****ing brutal new tunes!

email to: minister_of_metal (at) hotmail.com

Regards,
-S
Last edited by ScytheZone at Apr 12, 2013,
#2
Wow TS, that... uhh.... that sounds really gay.
Like... really gay.

Also, this is advertising, so imma have to 'port you.
Quote by snipelfritz
You lost me at "Lubricate."

I'm raw, like nature. Nature boy. Big jungle leaves are my cum rags.

Sometimes I fuck a bamboo shoot.


There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
#3
just do it on the metal archives like everyone else
Quote by korinaflyingv
On the come up we were listening to Grateful Dead and the music started passing through my bowel and out my arsehole as this violet stream of light. I shat music. It was beautiful.
#5
I think you missed the part where nobody cares and the fact that you are advertising and will probably get warned. Or banned.

Actually, I don't really know the punishment for advertising.
Quote by snipelfritz
You lost me at "Lubricate."

I'm raw, like nature. Nature boy. Big jungle leaves are my cum rags.

Sometimes I fuck a bamboo shoot.


There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
#7
Molybdenum - Mo42

A silvery metal not found in a free state on Earth, known for its high melting point and low solubility in water. Molybdenum fills an important roll within many nitrogen-fixing bacteria, and within the construction and binding of various pigments, where its low solubility means toxicity is not a concern.

4/5
...Stapling helium to penguins since 1949.
#9
Quote by ScytheZone
also i believe i forgot to mention its free

How's about you suck mah dick for free?
Actually, no. Not for free.
You pay me first.
Then you can suck mah dick.
Quote by snipelfritz
You lost me at "Lubricate."

I'm raw, like nature. Nature boy. Big jungle leaves are my cum rags.

Sometimes I fuck a bamboo shoot.


There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
#10
Quote by ScytheZone
also i believe i forgot to mention its free



Well why didn't you say that. It changes everything. Because we would have paid some random for some shit reviews we can just read on youtube for free
#11
In this thread: https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1593396, TS says that he wants his work reviewed. Not by any common pleb though, oh no...I quote:

Quote by ScytheZone
and yeah some dude who was saying something earlier about a magazine quality review was right. i wasnt looking for a bunch of random dudes personal opinion but rather an accredited person to do so, who's opinion actually matters.


And yet he returns with this thread, evidently having decided that his opinion is one of the rare ones that DOES matter, despite him not writing for any magazines. This doesn't seem right, somehow.
#13
Fucking metal is for losers. Start a Justin Bieber review thread, and THEN you'll be less of a wanker. Fruitloop.
Do you feel warm within your cage?

And have you figured out yet -


Life goes by?
Quote by Hydra150
There's a dick on Earth, too
It's you
#14
Quote by Wolfinator-x
This thread is now about emoticons nobody uses.



Oh, people do use those. Usually the kind of person with a username like SLAYERRULZ666, and after the kind of post that involves an insult to -insert pop act here-, and a claim that metal is the one true kind of music.
#17
Quote by Minkaro
Oh, people do use those. Usually the kind of person with a username like SLAYERRULZ666, and after the kind of post that involves an insult to -insert pop act here-, and a claim that metal is the one true kind of music.

Awwww man I was just a kid when I created this account


Just kidding, metal ruuuuuuuuuuuulez
#18
Quote by Minkaro
Oh, people do use those. Usually the kind of person with a username like SLAYERRULZ666, and after the kind of post that involves an insult to -insert pop act here-, and a claim that metal is the one true kind of music.
That's what I had assumed. Hence "emoticons Nobody uses".


Nobody.


I'm implying those people are nobodies
#21
Quote by Todd Hart
Molybdenum - Mo42

A silvery metal not found in a free state on Earth, known for its high melting point and low solubility in water. Molybdenum fills an important roll within many nitrogen-fixing bacteria, and within the construction and binding of various pigments, where its low solubility means toxicity is not a concern.

4/5


Cobalt - Co27

Is found naturally only in chemically combined form. The free element, produced by reductive smelting, is a hard, lustrous, silver-gray metal. Cobalt-based blue pigments (cobalt blue) have been used since ancient times for jewelry and paints, and to impart a distinctive blue tint to glass. Miners had long used the name kobold ore (German for goblin ore) for some of the blue-pigment producing minerals. Cobalt is also used in some badass new strings by Ernie Ball, I highly recommend trying them if you haven't!

5/5
2011 Gibson Honeyburst LP Trad. w/ SD Whole Lotta Humbuckers
2014 Gibson Ocean Water Standard Plus
Marshall Haze 15W Head/Cab
Hughes & Kettner Tubemeister 5
#22
Quote by Minkaro
In this thread: https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1593396, TS says that he wants his work reviewed. Not by any common pleb though, oh no...I quote:


And yet he returns with this thread, evidently having decided that his opinion is one of the rare ones that DOES matter, despite him not writing for any magazines. This doesn't seem right, somehow.


I was gonna link to that thread.
There's no such thing; there never was. Where I am going you cannot follow me now.
#26
For the love of god TS could you be anymore cringeworthy
My Gear:
BC Rich Gunslinger Retro Blade
Vintage V100 Paradise + SD Alnico Pro Slash APH-2's
1963 Burns Short Scale Jazz Guitar
Dean Performer Florentine
Bugera 6260
Orange Micro Terror + cab
Digitech Bad Monkey
Zoom G2G
Last edited by RetroGunslinger at Apr 12, 2013,
#27
Quote by anvil is god
Metal is infantile at it's best, TS should start a blackgaze review blog.

Get your uninformed opinion out of here...
#30
Quote by rid_the_disease
I just gave myself head rush while trying to fart.


I wonder if you blocked all the holes in your body for long enough, except for your ears,
would you eventually fart out your ears?
That would look so majestic, standing there on a hilltop with your ears vibrating in the wind.

Anyone? Do we have a doctor in the house?
Last edited by kertets at Apr 12, 2013,
#31
Quote by crazysam23_Atax
Get your uninformed opinion out of here...


I love how is username is Anvil, probably one of the most influential Canadian Metal bands ever, talk about being a dolt!
2011 Gibson Honeyburst LP Trad. w/ SD Whole Lotta Humbuckers
2014 Gibson Ocean Water Standard Plus
Marshall Haze 15W Head/Cab
Hughes & Kettner Tubemeister 5
#32
Quote by ne14t
I love how is username is Anvil, probably one of the most influential Canadian Metal bands ever, talk about being a dolt!

I think he made his account when he was a teenager.

Even so, the "irony" is thick.
#33
Quote by crazysam23_Atax
I think he made his account when he was a teenager.

Even so, the "irony" is thick.


Bro, he was born in '98. He's nothing but a wee lil' tot.
For how can I give the King his place of worth above all else
when I spend my time striving to place the crown upon myself?
#37
^...what?
For how can I give the King his place of worth above all else
when I spend my time striving to place the crown upon myself?
#39
Quote by crazysam23_Atax
Ah, that explains it.

I still have my opinions on music, and they're still valid regardless of my age. Metal to me is of poor quality on average compared to genres like blackgaze and doom-drone.
#40
Quote by anvil is god
I still have my opinions on music, and they're still valid regardless of my age. Metal to me is of poor quality on average compared to genres like blackgaze and doom-drone.

I'm picturing a pasty 15-year-old with dorky glasses and curly hair saying that.
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