#1
How would you get votes to put yourself into office for public service?

Me, I'm not sure which party I'd run for and almost certain none will have me but, if I did, I would campaign within eyeshot of the rival's HQ, and just because here's where I know, let's just say, it'll be here.

I'd pick something, anything, and attack it... or... if the party I'm with is in power, find anything, and proudly display it.

What would you do to get into office? - that doesn't involve taking it by force.
Quote by laid-to-waste
look nigga, if you're chillin with 5 bros and 2 hos, you're gonna wanna pay attention to all of em equally. not moon over the hos forever and laugh at every shitty thing they say and just stare at them all night, like some of my mates do.
#2
I'd shamelessly sell myself to corporations like a political hooker.
Quote by ironman1478
im romanian and am offended. most of the people in romania make americans look like autistic kids on ritalin
Quote by ProfessorJim
I'm autistic and on ritalin and am offended. Most autistic kids on ritalin make americans look like romanians.
#4
Be the best candidate

Quote by emad
jthm_guitarist
Warned for trolling!


Quote by metal4eva_22
Didn't you say that you had a stuffed fox that you would occasionally fuck?

Quote by Axelfox
It's not a fox,it's a wolf.
#5
Your people, all people, your fellow man, and woman, are like your class and this is secondary school/high school only their votes count and if you win enough of them you get to do stuff.
Quote by laid-to-waste
look nigga, if you're chillin with 5 bros and 2 hos, you're gonna wanna pay attention to all of em equally. not moon over the hos forever and laugh at every shitty thing they say and just stare at them all night, like some of my mates do.
#6
All you have to do is tell the people you are going to do everything they want done, say everything they want to hear. Then when they vote you in you do what every politician does and scrap your campaign motto in favor of your personal agenda. Just make sure you get the deal that comes with the $700,000 a year pension when you retire.
2011 Gibson Honeyburst LP Trad. w/ SD Whole Lotta Humbuckers
2014 Gibson Ocean Water Standard Plus
Marshall Haze 15W Head/Cab
Hughes & Kettner Tubemeister 5
#8
Quote by WCPhils
bomb Croydon

What did New Britain ever do to you?
Quote by laid-to-waste
look nigga, if you're chillin with 5 bros and 2 hos, you're gonna wanna pay attention to all of em equally. not moon over the hos forever and laugh at every shitty thing they say and just stare at them all night, like some of my mates do.
#9
I'm sure every candidate enters office with the full intention of keeping every promise they gave; that is, until they get to office and see how things actually are.
OBEY THE MIGHTY SHITKICKER
#12
Subliminal messaging. If that doesn't work, a more severe type of brainwashing.

However if I am against Whoomit for leader, I might as well give up from the start.
MY METALZ YOUTUBE CHANNEL

Quote by angusfan16
Okay UG where's my refund and free xbox. I need It for my 80 yr old grandma. She needs a new flower pot
#14
Director of Parks and Recreation Department

Oh, what would I do to win? Nothing.
Quote by Trowzaa
I wish I was American.

~ A Rolling Potato Gathers No Moss ~
#15
I would suck an incredible amount of ****

Like whoever voted for me I'd suck their ****.

And then if I won and I needed to settle an international dispute, I'd just suck more ****.

If an opposition leader created a scandal about me, I'd just suck his **** until he shut up.

If it was a national holiday, I'd just tell everyone to line up and I'd suck their cocks.

If there was a sex scandal I'd just be like "yeah I sucked his ****, so what? I do it all the time" and then they'd be like "oh yeah" and then I'd suck their ****.

I'd motivate scientists and shit by sucking the **** of whoever applied for a patent.

I'd get rid of welfare by sucking the **** of everyone that had a job once a week.


Vote for me, I'll suck your ****!
#18
I would lie and cheat. Most of all, I would promise things that I obviously couldn't deliver and people would believe it and vote me into office.
#19
Kill everyone who opposed me
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#20
Quote by flexiblemile
Some stuff about dicks!


How is this man not president yet?
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#22
Quote by captainsnazz
I'd tell everyone about how I wouldn't increase university fees.


And then I'd triple them.

It's crazy, but it just might work.
But boys will be boys and girls have those eyes
that'll cut you to ribbons, sometimes
and all you can do is just wait by the moon
and bleed if it's what she says you ought to do
#24
Quote by magnus_maximus
Be frank, honest and not piss around the bushes.

But don't pander to them, like Blair.
But boys will be boys and girls have those eyes
that'll cut you to ribbons, sometimes
and all you can do is just wait by the moon
and bleed if it's what she says you ought to do
#25
Quote by flexiblemile
I would suck an incredible amount of ****

Like whoever voted for me I'd suck their ****.

And then if I won and I needed to settle an international dispute, I'd just suck more ****.

If an opposition leader created a scandal about me, I'd just suck his **** until he shut up.

If it was a national holiday, I'd just tell everyone to line up and I'd suck their cocks.

If there was a sex scandal I'd just be like "yeah I sucked his ****, so what? I do it all the time" and then they'd be like "oh yeah" and then I'd suck their ****.

I'd motivate scientists and shit by sucking the **** of whoever applied for a patent.

I'd get rid of welfare by sucking the **** of everyone that had a job once a week.


Vote for me, I'll suck your ****!

Oh how I would vote for you. Multiply times.
Quote by ironman1478
im romanian and am offended. most of the people in romania make americans look like autistic kids on ritalin
Quote by ProfessorJim
I'm autistic and on ritalin and am offended. Most autistic kids on ritalin make americans look like romanians.