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#1
...and quite frankly I'm getting sick of it.

Here is my situation. I live in a 2 bedroom apartment. I have the smaller bedroom to myself, a girl lives in the living room and a couple lives in the larger bedroom. The boyfriend moved in by surprise just days after we signed the lease -- it would've been nice to know his plans beforehand but thats another story, I really don't mind cheaper bills.

I've only lived here about a month and will be moving at the end of June (I move a lot, again, thats another story) and I'm already pulling my ****ing hair out. No one really talks to each other or does anything, so the apartment on any given day tends to be quiet and boring. I don't mind that at all - it's much better than obnoxious roommates that party 24/7. But that couple doesn't seem to realize that. Two weeks ago they started having sex every day at a noticeable volume. They know other people are home (I purposely make noise to let people know I'm home), but go at it anyways - sometimes with the door cracked open a few inches. I really hope they are oblivious to their actions... but nonetheless the issue is there.

So far, I've just dealt with it and smoked weed until I don't care anymore, but thats getting old. Just the other day, I tried the "turn up your music and drown it out" trick, but they just took it as a license to start having REALLY loud sex.

So this is where you guys come in. I could go the generic route - leave an anonymous note or personally ask them - but thats not funny, entertaining, or humiliating in anyway, and if I can really **** with them, I will. Do you guys have any funny suggestions? Has anyone dealt with this before?
#2
They obviously want you to join in.
Quote by jakesmellspoo
ooh look at me i'm ERIKLENSHERR and i work at fancy pants desk jobs and wear ties and ply barely legal girls with weed and booze i'm such a classy motherfucker.
#4
Quote by ErikLensherr
They obviously want you to join in.

Stole my answer, bastard.


Quote by CoreysMonster

I still like cho0onger more than the 2 of you

Quote by OneHappyCamper
joke's on you, i actually fuck my cat
#7
Quote by RPGoof
No one in the right mind would sleep with her, so unfortunately thats not going to work

we need pics I think. It will help for better ideas, you see
#8
Get a hooker and **** them on said persons bed.

But in all reality man you are totally ****ed till you can move, I just went through a similar issue with a room mate, brought it up with the dude and he didn't give two shits so end of May I am moving the **** out and leaving him to move in with his girlfriend of 4 and a half months, cant wait till that one blows up. Best bet for you though is to get some really good headphones and/or some really good ear plugs.
2011 Gibson Honeyburst LP Trad. w/ SD Whole Lotta Humbuckers
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#11
Smoke weed and turn your music up loud
*-)
Quote by Bob_Sacamano
i kinda wish we all had a penis and vagina instead of buttholes

i mean no offense to buttholes and poop or anything

Rest in Peace, Troy Davis and Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis and Eric Garner and Mike Brown
#13
Why is this even an issue? Be a man. Just tell them to shut the phuck up or you'll make them shut the phuck up.

Problem solved.

You're welcome, pussy.
#15
I bet living in the living room sucks.
*-)
Quote by Bob_Sacamano
i kinda wish we all had a penis and vagina instead of buttholes

i mean no offense to buttholes and poop or anything

Rest in Peace, Troy Davis and Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis and Eric Garner and Mike Brown
#17
o ytgfrvtgyhujmk,lokijuhgfcd cfvgbhnjumkl;.lokiuy6t5r4e3wser5t6y7890p-987t6f5r4dexcfrtgvhyujhygtf

Oh sorry about that, I was just wiping the jizz off my keyboard.

I was going to say if you can't beat them, join them, but there's already comments for that.

I guess you could just pull the fire alarm every time. I dunno.
Edit: Buy an airhorn and use it each time! It's perfect! Do that!
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I'm raw, like nature. Nature boy. Big jungle leaves are my cum rags.

Sometimes I fuck a bamboo shoot.


There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
Last edited by Joshua Garcia at Apr 23, 2013,
#18
Record the sound of them and post it here.
Also film them and post it on a porn site.
Sneak into the room when they're not there and fill the all the condoms with your D.N.A
I don't know, use your imagination.
#20
Quote by RPGoof
.

So far, I've just dealt with it and smoked weed until I don't care anymore



LOL

Typical non-pot head mentality


Kick their door open and tell them to keep it down. I hate when people make a huge problem that can be fixed with a little assertiveness.

People are a buncho pussies these days.

EDIT:

Holy crap. This exactly.

Quote by 5_Years_Dead
Why is this even an issue? Be a man. Just tell them to shut the phuck up or you'll make them shut the phuck up.

Problem solved.

You're welcome, pussy.


Posting it again because
Last edited by Phazon at Apr 23, 2013,
#21
bust in with a camera and a bunch of friends and tell em they're on Candid Camera
Sail upon the open skies
#22
Have even louder sex in the room next to them when they get going. Turn it into a competition.
I shall grant you three wishes.

None of which will work.


Does the above post enrage, offend or confuse you?

Good.


I like my women how I like my guitars. Curvy and like it when I finger them.
#25
TS is jealous.

Virginity is curable...
“Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge.”
Charles Darwin
#26
Genuine answer: Run into their room, rip off your shirt, yell "Let's do this!" and pretend to jump on their bed. They'll scream and tell you to get out. That's when you say "Yeah, and I want you guys to be quieter".
#28
Just slam the wall with a nice closed fist and start ****ing yelling out ''YEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAABUDDYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LIGHTWEIGHT BAAADDDDDDAAAAYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!'' non stop until their quiet down.


That should do it.
#29
turn up the music loudly again but play the heaviest, gruesome shit you can find.
Last edited by Dregen at Apr 23, 2013,
#30
Quote by kalnoky7
Get with the living room girl


this and turn it into a competition

and how long do they have sex? just smoke outside untill they've finished
"If I tell you I'm good, you would probably think I'm boasting. If I tell you I'm no good, you know I'm lying."
#32
Next time you hear them, go to their door and knock loudly, then yell at them to keep it down.


Just be straightforward, and it will probably work.


If they don't stop after your first warning, bring a camera.
#34
Quote by element4433
I bet living in the living room sucks.

This is all I could think while reading the OP
___

Quote by The_Blode
she was saying things like... do you want to netflix and chill but just the chill part...too bad she'll never know that I only like the Netflix part...
#35
Just tell them to close the door or something, or close it for them. it's not that hard
cat
#36
I could just tell them but that is not entertaining for me, nor is it humiliating for them. I was thinking earlier of forging a letter from the apartment office for noise violations... that kind of thing. You think I needed a serious answer?
Last edited by RPGoof at Apr 23, 2013,
#37
Quote by RPGoof
I could just tell them but that is not entertaining for me, nor is it humiliating for them. I was thinking earlier of forging a letter from the apartment office for noise violations... that kind of thing. You think I needed a serious answer?

well yeah why do you want to be a dick about it
cat
#39
break into their room while their doing the deed and pour a bucket of ice cold water onto them

either that or start jerking it really loudly and scream the chicks name
Quote by Night
wtf is a selfie? is that like, touching yourself or something?
#40
talk to the girl in the living room about it.
then both of you confront the couples about it.

or you can go banging on their door, screaming something filled with curse.
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