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Toadvine
Obviously, not a golfer
Join date: May 2010
171 IQ
#1
Hey pit, with complete reckless abandon, and against my better judgement, help me name my unborn illegitimate son. We got 'till August, before the the little son of a bitch gets here. So let the idiocracy begin.

Personally I like standard Patriotic American names, if it were up to me, I'd name him, General Patton, or Stonewall Jackson, or John Wayne, or the like. But I'll take some advice from some ya' youngster foreign delegates.

Maybe, although entirely un-pit-esque, we will even get a serious response.

I will let you know of the final result.

Maybe even a poll in the future.
"Pain or damage don't end the world nor despair, nor fuckin' beatings. The world ends when you're dead, until then you have more punishment in store. Stand it like a man, and give some back."
Trowzaa
TwoWorldWars&OneWorldCup
Join date: Mar 2009
181 IQ
#2
Keith.

Or Joshua Garcia.
dirtbag ballet by the bins down the alley
as i walk through the chalet of the shadow of death
everything that you've come to expect


theogonia777
Miss Kristen
Join date: Jun 2009
230 IQ
#9
Cumdumpster
Quote by Hal-Sephira
Shut the mother#%$& up, $^%got. You have a #$%^ing terrible muther&@$#ing taste in %#$@ing music, @&%$ing movies and %&$#ing video games. Every time I see you on the forums, you are always saying something overrated and some $@&#ing sh*t. You are just mother$^@%ing ignorant as a whole.

Get a #%$@ing life or you will get banned for life.


Quote by Arby911
Kristen is very open-minded; believes that everyone is entitled to her opinion...


Quote by NirvanaLuvr16
omg its better than i imagined... so dark and cozy and warm...


Read this please.
Bob_Sacamano
UG Board King
Join date: Jan 2012
10 IQ
#10
Dee Pitt
Quote by Sliide90027
But as a bigoted lemming, you have so cry an Alinslyite slur revealing you lack of reason and sense.


Quote by MusicLord16
BOB 1. ur 20 and two u like evil things and idk if u worship the devil
AeroRocker
I'm too old for this ****
Join date: Oct 2007
70 IQ
#11
Mittens.

Then when people come over you can be all like "let me show you Mittens. Come here, Mittens!!" And everyone will be like "omg he has a kitty! I hope... eh ...oh. A kid."

Real answer: give him a normal name, like a non-jackass parent.
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LET'S GO BUCKS
Toadvine
Obviously, not a golfer
Join date: May 2010
171 IQ
#13
Quote by WCPhils
whoomit


Where is Whoomit?

Is Whoomit banned?

Should definately be theguitarist, because he's the sexy one right?
"Pain or damage don't end the world nor despair, nor fuckin' beatings. The world ends when you're dead, until then you have more punishment in store. Stand it like a man, and give some back."
Weaponized
Join date: Mar 2011
41 IQ
#14
Name him ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1599041

"Josh?" "Here!" "Max?" "He's absent!" "ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1599041" "Present!"
Joshua Garcia
An actual big boy
Join date: Jun 2009
4,730 IQ
#15
Quote by AeroRocker
Real answer: give him a normal name, like a non-jackass parent.

Aw c'mon man. It's not as bad as this:

Almost though.
Quote by RAB11
Josh-Claude Van DAAAAAAAAAAYUM GRRRL hook me up with dem digits
Last edited by Joshua Garcia at Apr 24, 2013,
ryan_nadon
ass brain
Join date: Mar 2008
10 IQ
#16
Artemus
Johann
Ulysses
Mortimer

Take your pick.
Quote by SomeoneYouKnew
Your post was the only bright spot in this disgusting piece of thread.

Quote by lexanirider78
You have balls. I like balls....(awkward silence)

Quote by SeveralSpecies
I waited for the rape.

...


...but the rape never came
eGraham
Rattle That Lock
Join date: Oct 2008
70 IQ
#18
Quote by AeroRocker
Mittens.

Then when people come over you can be all like "let me show you Mittens. Come here, Mittens!!" And everyone will be like "omg he has a kitty! I hope... eh ...oh. A kid."

Real answer: give him a normal name, like a non-jackass parent.

I thought about doing that, but opposite. Get a dog and name it like Freddie, and then I'd tell new people, "You'll have to ask Freddie if that's alright, first"

Then I'd call for Freddie and a dog would come out.


**** you, it's funny.
Quote by Trowzaa
I wish I was American.

~ A Rolling Potato Gathers No Moss ~
ErikLensherr
UnBanned
Join date: Jul 2011
10 IQ
#21
If I was having a bastard I'd seriously name him Jon Snow.
Quote by EpiExplorer
I swear this guy in particular writes for the telegraph or some shit.

Quote by EndTheRapture51
fifth harmony defense force assemble
sideslick
Teenage Accident
Join date: Jun 2012
50 IQ
#23
Quote by Joshua Garcia
Aw c'mon man. It's not as bad as this:

Almost though.


Courage Wolf is quite possibly the greatest name of all time.

His name is Courage, for ****'s sake!

Anyways, OP: Name the little accident "Joshua Garcia".
Quote by Lt. Shinysides
man, I'm so sad I made this thread now after seeing those shake shack burgers. I would buy an extra just to fuck it while I eat its siblings. then i'd eat that one too.


I am so sorry for my mother's "escapades"...
willT08
Banned
Join date: Jul 2009
211 IQ
#24
Quote by ErikLensherr
If I was having a bastard I'd seriously name him Jon Snow.


?
Mephaphil
No empty frets.
Join date: Apr 2012
150 IQ
#25
I knew a security guard called Courage.

He was a ****.
Quote by Shredwizard445
Go ahead and spend your money, I don't care. It won't make you sound better.


Quote by Shredwizard445
Sure upgrading your gear will make you sound better.


smartalecG94
Just my Bronze showing
Join date: Feb 2011
31 IQ
#26
Dzhokhar.
Quote by captainsnazz
That's some nice hair you've got there.


I'm watching you.


Quote by BottleOfSmoke
If I was a rich man in 17th century Britain, I'd totally adopt Alec and make him my heir.

People say I tan easily, but that's just my Bronze showing through.
slash_GNR666
Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan!
Join date: Jun 2009
20 IQ
#27
Jay Seeney

He will be the coolest kid on the block



But if you give a child a fucked up name you really don't deserve to have children
Quote by lambofgod127
btw im in hs and im almost 18 so if u do think she was flirting with me dont say that its wrong im almost a grown man.




༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽ WE ARE ROB ༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽
mystical_1
Doomed
Join date: Jul 2008
20 IQ
#33
Harding
Ike
Roosevelt
Madison
Bush

Bush would be an amazing first name for a boy.
Quote by Pagan_Poetry
Sadly this is Ultimate-guitar, not Simple-guitar. We can't help you.


metacarpi
Too old for this ****
Join date: Aug 2007
90 IQ
#34
Booker or Comstock.
Quote by GLP_Arclite
Pooping is well good though, to be fair.


I've got a handle on the fiction.

I'm losing my grip, 'cos I'm losing my fingers.
MinterMan22
steady eating booty mc||
Join date: Nov 2007
51 IQ
#35
Quote by Weaponized
Name him ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1599041

"Josh?" "Here!" "Max?" "He's absent!" "ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1599041" "Present!"

L
..::fat
lard::..
TunerAddict
Real Ass Nigga
Join date: Aug 2008
80 IQ
#37
get married so your child doesn't have to live its life as a bastard and suffer through such negative social repercussions as a result of your immoral behavior

wait, are you telling me this isn't the 1950s? Well then...

go to google, google a random name generator, and bam, you got yourself a name
Quote by jrcsgtpeppers

If women can be annoyed there arent any women incongress I should be allowed to be pissed off there are no members of pink floyd or the beatles in congress.
ProphetToJables
Tight Tight Tight
Join date: Dec 2008
150 IQ
#39
Jamez with a z.
Gear:

Gibson 2005 Les Paul Standard
Fender Road Worn Strat w/ Noiseless pickups
Marshall JCM 2000 401C
Marshall Vintage Modern 2266
Marshall 1960A cab (Dave Hill from Slade's old cab)
Ibanez TS9DX
EHX Little Big Muff
Freshman Acoustic
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