TehDutchDude
I'm really Dutch.
Join date: Oct 2009
995 IQ
#1
For Posterity
verse 1
I carry the memories of old
of days filled with peace
and winters so cold
my ancestors are forever gone
yet in my heart
they find their home

verse 2
I think of a time long ago
when family and friends
were safe and sound
a fall from grace
and lives so fast-paced
remember to carry on

chorus
as time passes by
my will weakens
my bones wither
to those still standing I say
one day you too will fade away
but don't be afraid
because memories are here to stay

bridge
some time we will all have perished
drifted away like clouds
lost in a crowd
what we leave behind will be cherished
let your name be renowned
ascend beyond the stars

chorus
as time passes by
my will weakens
my bones wither
to those still standing I say
one day you too will fade away
but don't be afraid
because memories are here to stay
Yeah
louis.dearing
Registered User
Join date: Apr 2013
55 IQ
#2
Really like this

I can pick out countless melodies which can fit to this rhyming scheme, which is good as it leaves you lots of options to develop!

I love the chorus in this, it can make a real connection with listeners who have maybe lost/are losing a close family relative and it's quite uplifting!

I think this is a really nice song, maybe if I was more experienced in songwriting I'd be able to find something to improve, but my days are young as of now
TehDutchDude
I'm really Dutch.
Join date: Oct 2009
995 IQ
#3
Nearly a hundred views and only one comment. Come on good people
Yeah