sarabarryy
Registered User
Join date: Jul 2013
65 IQ
#1
This is a song of mine and I just wanted some constructive criticism and feedback. Also if anyone could figure out any chords or music to put to this song


Down this winding road
He wants to know will it take me where

I need to go, there’s no escape
To this life he said I’m aware

Climbed through these lines and vines
But didn’t make it out

And never had an answer why
Just always seemed to be in doubt

Chorus
There’s a shadow he hides behind
But everything he feels is still inside
He can’t put it aside

All this time I’ve tried to find
The reason its all bottled up inside

Verse 2
The pieces of his life, he took apart
Never found them, he hid them from the start

Hidden in the dark
On the inside he’s torn apart

But It’s just dull and dry
No reason to even cry

Chorus
There’s a shadow he hides behind
But everything he feels is still inside
He can’t put it aside

All this time I’ve tried to find
The reason its all bottled up inside

Bridge
Trapped on the blind side
With chains to his head
He said I’ll run away and make up for the
Tears I’ve shed

Chorus
There’s a shadow he hides behind
But everything he feels is still inside
He can’t put it aside

All this time I’ve tried to find
the reason its bottled up inside

Outro
Everything you feel can’t be inside
Can’t just put it aside
matthewzguitarz
Registered User
Join date: May 2013
537 IQ
#2
I liked the lyrics, they are really good in my opinion. I was going to think of some chords for them, but my guitar string broke and I don't have any strings right now(forgot to order some).
Cavalcade
razor sharp
Join date: Jul 2011
1,942 IQ
#3
Step 1: Sing it out loud. Record yourself.
Step 2: Pick up a guitar and strum some chords over the recording.
Step 3: Try different chords for each part until it sounds right.
If you do it yourself, it'll sound more like what you had in mind.
rudylee
Registered User
Join date: Jun 2011
10 IQ
#6
1 4 5 Add A Minor Chord Set Up Your Beat ...i Just Played Your Song To My Style Sounded Awsome And Pick Your Key That You Sing In
amonamarthmetal
Registered User
Join date: Aug 2008
1,808 IQ
#7
I would, but you dint even give a melody or anything to work with musically.
Gear:
Dean RC7X (Bareknuckle Coldsweat pickups)
Ibanez Rg2570Z (Bareknuckle Juggernaughts)
Schecter KM-6
Schecter Hellraiser Hybrid 7 String
Engl Powerball II
Orange PPC412
Line 6 Pod HD500X
Cavalcade
razor sharp
Join date: Jul 2011
1,942 IQ
#8
Quote by rudylee
1 4 5 Add A Minor Chord Set Up Your Beat ...i Just Played Your Song To My Style Sounded Awsome And Pick Your Key That You Sing In

You There Maybe You Can Answer A Question That's Been Bugging Me For A While ...Why Do People Type Like This Its Annoying ...And Now That Thats Done I Cant Understand A Single Word Of Your Post
Brooklyn_Razorb
Registered User
Join date: Feb 2012
132 IQ
#9
Quote by Cavalcade
You There Maybe You Can Answer A Question That's Been Bugging Me For A While ...Why Do People Type Like This Its Annoying ...And Now That Thats Done I Cant Understand A Single Word Of Your Post



Obviously, Everything Is A Proper Noun.
Or Maybe He Is Just Quite ******ed, And Wanting To Take More Time With Him Response, Pressing Shift Too Many Mother ****ing Times.
Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering.
Snotfish
whacktacular
Join date: Jan 2008
474 IQ
#10
I know this will come off as me being an asshole to you.

With that being said, don't narrow down on your personal weaknesses and turn them into yet another boring set of lyrics. Go out and do something in your life that makes you ecstatic and write down what you are feeling then, being ambiguous and entertaining at the same time. Depressive doldrums of words have been done countless times and they are ****ing boring.

If this strikes you as rude instead of criticism then so be it.

edit: I hope you mostly wanted criticism on the lyrics and not someone coming up with a melody to YOUR song. Pick up a guitar and mess around until you like it enough to record. This is music, not poetry with meaningless backing sounds.
Can't believe how strange it is to be anything at all.
Last edited by Snotfish at Jul 31, 2013,