#1
I am technically what people would consider the "band leader" of my band. I find all the gigs, I set up practices, I find people, I go out and promote our band, I create a majority of the riffs, and I organize the songs for sets, etc. However, because my band is wanting to expand and get bigger, I need help. I ask my band mates for help and they always say the will....but they never do. This is, in no exaggeration, easily over my 10th time asking for help, and they say "don't worry about it, it will get done" or "yeah, sure. I can help." Finally today I announced that if I do not get help on this, I will leave the band, nothing against them as people, it's just that I can't handle doing all the work by myself. The guitarist then proceeded to say "Don't threaten me, I know you're not, but don't threaten me". I have no idea what to do guys. I want to focus on making the music, and not everything else. Am I being unreasonable or what? What should be my next move? Thanks.
#2
So...leave the band. If they refuse to take this shit seriously and do some work, then leave. Sharing the workload is part of what being in a band is about; if your bandmates would rather just shunt all the work to you, fuck them.
#3
Yeah I'm with Crazysam here. You said you'd quit if they didn't help. They didn't help. Now you quit.
And no, Guitar Hero will not help. Even on expert. Really.
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#4
Yeah, all bands need a leader who becomes the focal point of all the work, but it's a team effort and everyone has to contribute.

Quit now and see how long it takes them to realise how much you did. When they figure it out, they'll probably apologise & ask you to come back. When it happens, make sure they realise you're only coming back if their promises of help are kept.
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#5
^^^ Lol why would you go back? They wouldn't change - you'd be in the same position again.
And no, Guitar Hero will not help. Even on expert. Really.
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#6
Maybe, maybe not.

Quitting may be enough to give the other guys the kick up the arse they need to contribute more, if that's the case then going back shouldn't put you back in the same position.

It purely depends on the people though: some will never learn and if that's the case, then yeah, going back would be a bad idea.
Gibson LP Traditional, LP GT, LP Studio, SG Standard x2
Barber Tone Press > EHX Worm >TC Polytune > EXH Glove > EHX East River Drive > Zoom G3 > TC Spark Mini Booster
EVH 5150 III LBXII
Jet City JCA22H
.
My SoundCloud
#7
^^^^ Yeah, that's just way too optimistic for me.
And no, Guitar Hero will not help. Even on expert. Really.
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#8
You are the one band member they can't replace. Your skills are the skills every band needs and which are the most scarce. However you will be in the position of having to find a new band, most of whom will be no better than your current band mates in this area. So I'd say take your time and think it through.

There are just so many great musicians out there that can't find their own.........! Or at least ones who just want to gig and someone else to organise it

Our drummer used to play with Rory Gallagher, I don't know why he would want to play with us other than the lack of an organiser.

My thought is that whatever band you are in you will find you gradually take over the organisational duties even if you find some musicians are more appreciative than others. The bit I hate most is when two of them fall out but expect me to 'tell' the person who they've fallen out with to shape up.

It may be that if you leave they will want a crisis meeting and at least you'll be appreciated more, they'll then do a bit more for a while but drift back because that's what most people do with good intentions. It's up to you if that is going to be enough.
#9
I'm in a similar position - my other band members aren't very committed.

We've had crisis meetings in the past, I asked whether everyone wanted to carry on as we weren't getting everyone at every practice.
I was hoping that at that point the people who kept missing practices would then say they wanted to end it and quit but instead they all said they wanted to carry on!

The meeting gave them a kick up the arse, but as others have said, the kick up the arse works for a while and things soon go back to how they were before.
#10
Thanks to everybody who responded. It feels awesome to have people who understand what I should do. Just to let you all know, I am quitting the band as soon as I can get the other two to meet up again. I actually already have found some other people, who I go to college with, that I can jam with. Thank you so much again for the great advice, it really helped me out a lot!
#11
I know you've made your decision, but just another way of looking at the same thing... food for thought.

Let's change this up a bit....

I am technically what people would consider the "president" of my business. I land all the contracts, I establish product research and development, I hire staff, I go out and promote the company, I personally create most of our product, etc. However, because my business is wanting to expand and get bigger, I need help. I ask my co-owners and management team for help and they always say they will....but they never do. This is, in no exaggeration, easily over my 10th time asking for help, and they say "don't worry about it, it will get done" or "yeah, sure. I can help." Finally today I announced that if I do not get help on this, I will leave the business, nothing against them as people, it's just that I can't handle doing all the work by myself. The vice-preseident then proceeded to say "Don't threaten me, I know you're not, but don't threaten me". I have no idea what to do guys. I want to focus on making the product, and not everything else. Am I being unreasonable or what? What should be my next move? Thanks.


The answer is clear, isn't it?


CT
Could I get some more talent in the monitors, please?

I know it sounds crazy, but try to learn to inhale your voice. www.thebelcantotechnique.com

Chris is the king of relating music things to other objects in real life.