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I wear my pants around my ass and the only thing keeping them up is my huge wang and the power of friction.

“There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want.”
~ Bill Watterson

I keep the stickers on my hat and call all of my friends things I would kick someone's ass if they called me by.

Baltimore Orioles: 2014 AL Eastern Division Champions, 2017: 75-87
Baltimore Ravens: 2012 World Champions, 2017: 9-7
2017 NFL Pick 'Em: 164-91-1
Quote by Philip_pepper
And they say my threads are bad.

they aren't lying

i mean look at those threads

****in bad
Last edited by yoman297 at Sep 30, 2013,
Call my friends a bunch of negros and bring a single use barbecue to their house with some beer if the weather is nice.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Omae wa mou

Quote by www.dcj20
dafuq, i kno jokes dont wwork when u hav to explain them but now im confused. was the mention of a "bugera" amp a euphemism for anal sex ?
When I get asked at an interview what my skills are, I tell the keeping it real.
Quote by SGstriker
If KFC is finger-licking good, then people would probably suck dicks for Popeyes. That's how good it is.

There's nothing left here to be saved
Just barreling dogs and barking trains
Another year lost to the blue line
I live in the past and refuse to better myself, does that count?
My God, it's full of stars!
keepin it real, packin steel, gettin high
cos life's a bitch and then you die
Quote by korinaflyingv
On the come up we were listening to Grateful Dead and the music started passing through my bowel and out my arsehole as this violet stream of light. I shat music. It was beautiful.
Quote by Baby Joel
I think.


I think I'm real, therefore I am
Quote by Night
wtf is a selfie? is that like, touching yourself or something?
Im Home with the Downies
PSN: Shibuib
add me

Elvis Presley aint got no soul, Chuck Berry is rock and roll.


Any excuse.
...Stapling helium to penguins since 1949.
By having sex at least every other day

The "Re-incarnation of Plato" Award 2009
(most intelligent)
The "Good Samaritan" Award 2009 (most helpful)

[font="Palatino Linotype
Who's Andy Timmons??
Don't be TS

but srs, don't go full ******... that's what you don't do.
Quote by jrcsgtpeppers
There shall be a stop to this madness. The battle is not over. My tasty licks aren't going anywhere.

Quote by The_Blode
^ I've just realised if you say Simple Plan's 2011 effort "Get Your Heart On!" really fast in a Southern American accent, it sounds gross. . .like sexual gross!

Quote by Necroheadbanger
I'm looking for professional bongo-ists and triangle-ists to make a Progressive Technical Brutal Death Metal band
(will be called AxOxJxLxAxIxVxXxUxWxZxQxUxRxWxGxJxSxAxLxKxMxNxHxUxGxAxAxWxVxCxBxZxVx)
(Don't even ask what it means)

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