#1
Heya guitar-playing, totally badass residents of UG! So, I need some halp. And as soon as you read the situation odds are you'll facepalm and disown me as a disgrace, but if you could find it in your <3 to point me in that sort of right direction that would be oh, so rad.

So, I've always told people I could play guitar. And for a while, way back when, that was true. I'm 18 now and haven't played in *years*. Over the summer I bought a great Yamaha acoustic along with some learning apparatuses to help me out (Chord Buddy, etc) and I just couldn't do it. So what I'm looking for now is the sort of hardware equivalent of lip syncing-- but for guitar. Like, a programmable guitar almost? Something that would allow me to "fake" playing. I'm not going to lie and say I'd use such a thing responsibly, I would wallow in the badassery that comes with playing sexy songs on what would probably be an electric guitar. However, a friend and I are both really into electronic music, and have wanted to start a little duette type gig for a while. I figure if I could find a guitar with this capability odds are I could adapt it for other purposes. Any help, UG? <3
#2
this will probably come off as being harsh, but I think this is doing you a kindness: if you're not willing to put in the effort to actually play the instrument, then I'd say it's not worth your time and money. Just because you've got an instrument slung around you doesn't make you cool. If you really like the electronic music scene, then focus on becoming good at your art in that area. Learn to produce, use DAWs and sequencers and all of that stuff. The electronic music scene is massive. For example, I've seen people make music using devices which augment the sounds that are emitted when moving your muscles (obviously, what one defines "music" as is another story). If you want to break into the music scene, develop the skill-set you need to get where you want to be. Writing "Can play air guitar" on your CV is probably not going to count in your favor.
#3
I'm going to second that. Besides, I don't think there even is such a thing as what you're looking for. If you're into the electronic thing, and you want to somehow incorporate guitar into that, invest in a sample library.