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#1
Slacker's response to my murder question in the "How to how to" thread got me thinking. People are always finding dead bodies in the forest during a walk , you'd think murderers would have learned by now.

So where would you personally hide a body? Rules are:

- If it's found, you're going to jail forever and mobsters will go after your friends and family
- You are a suspect and police will snoop around spots you frequent (buried in the backyard might be a bad idea)
-cant destroy the body
-NO NECROPHILIA YOU CREEPS

I have a canal right by my house. I'd put it in a couch and dump it
Last edited by Weaponized at Oct 24, 2013,
#3
What's the body of.

A little girl?
[img]http://i.imgur.com/LYZyCdp.gif[/img]


Quote by CrossBack7
Momie's like not even a real person, just an asian, lesbian spirit.
#7
Quote by Trowzaa
So I can't put it in a woodchipper or anything like that?

nope
Quote by Momentosis
What's the body of.

A little girl?

editing the OP
#8
I've got an old 50" TV with a thick back. Easily fit a body in that
| (• ◡•)| (❍ᴥ❍ʋ
#9
I'd borrow a boat, and drop it into the ocean. Weighed down of course. Perhaps even dismembered and in a barrel or something.
RIP Gooze

cats
#10
Quote by Trowzaa
So I can't put it in a woodchipper or anything like that?

Why would you? Might as well take the body to the police station with a full confession


I live in Finland, the country is over 85% forest and has near 200,000 lakes

I think it'd be pretty easy to hide something never to be found here, to be honest
#11
I'd bury it a meter under a dead dog or something, that way when the police dogs smell the body at that spot they will dig up the dead dog and think it's a false lead.
#12
people are always finding bodies in shallow graves, so I'd just dig a deep grave in a forest.
#13
Bury it in the backyard of someone I don't like then ring the cops with an anonymous tip.
#14
Quote by 100Roy001
I'd bury it a meter under a dead dog or something, that way when the police dogs smell the body at that spot they will dig up the dead dog and think it's a false lead.

Then you have to explain why you have a recently deceased dog in your backyard.
"I think, as a musician, you should practice your technique to be as good as you need to be to facilitate whatever ideas come into your head."
- Devin Townsend
#15
Quote by Mind_Reader7
Then you have to explain why you have a recently deceased dog in your backyard.

because it died.....
___

Quote by The_Blode
she was saying things like... do you want to netflix and chill but just the chill part...too bad she'll never know that I only like the Netflix part...
#16
Quote by WCPhils
because it died.....
I thought most people put dead animals in the bin?
"I think, as a musician, you should practice your technique to be as good as you need to be to facilitate whatever ideas come into your head."
- Devin Townsend
#17
tie it to cinder blocks, take it on my boat and dump it in the middle of lake ontario (at least 15km out)
#18
Quote by Mind_Reader7
I thought most people put dead animals in the bin?

Not necessarily I suppose it depends on the size of the pet as well as the length of time the pet was owned.
#20
1) Cut up body, place pieces in plastic bag, place bag in a cooler.
2) Source some cinder blocks.
3) Take the cooler and cinderblocks, go out on a boat, head out past the continental shelf.
4) Throw cinderblocks in the bag.
5) Dump body in the deep ocean. The continental shelf will prevent the body from eventually being washed ashore by ocean currents.
6) Go home and sit in a dark room with a glass of whiskey.
#24
Quote by sam b
Why would you? Might as well take the body to the police station with a full confession


it worked in fargo

actually, now that i think about it i think the exact opposite happened.

i can't even remember, i need to watch it again.
#25
The Wicklow mountains, it's known for apparently being where all the drug gangs hide bodies and there's supposed to be hundreds of them buried up there that have never been found.
#26
Hide it at a funeral home. Who would be suspicious of a dead body there?
Sail upon the open skies
#27
Quote by Horsedick.MPEG
How do you prepare tea?

Quote by theogonia777
thrown into the boston harbor

Quote by Crofty89
Only if you boil the ocean first



JUST BOUGHT SIKTH DEATH OF A DEAD DAY ALBUM FROM THE US AND IT CAME WITH THE 6 YEAR OLD SIGNED POSTER (30/4/12) WIN
#28
Quote by guitarxo
inside my body

that's what she said.

Volcanoes.
Quote by Dave Mustaine
If you want to be treated intelligently, act intelligent.

#31
Freeze it, cut it to small pieces, flush pieces down the toilet.
Quote by SlinkyBlue


The solution is simple and obvious.

We revolt against ourselves. Mass suicide. The ultimate revolution.
#33
Not being able to destroy the body is an unreasonable condition...
“Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge.”
Charles Darwin
#34
I'd hide it in my belly obviously.
There's no such thing; there never was. Where I am going you cannot follow me now.
#35
Quote by Arby911
Not being able to destroy the body is an unreasonable condition...

not really.

it would not be particularly difficult. virtually the lone fisherman in a marina full of rich yacht types means that access to an empty marina in the wee hours of the morning under the cover of darkness would be expected and usual behaviour. the hauling of incredibly large bags and multiple trips to and fro the boat and truck would not be out of the ordinary either. driving out to the middle of the lake would be entirely within the norm as well.

but i would never kill somebody because im a real sweetheart. kill them with kindness perhaps >
#37
Quote by The_Casinator
This thread worries me. Isn't anyone else worried?

ya we got some ****ed up people in the pit... lets just hope they don't rage and are stupid enough to actually do anything
#38
Since "can't destroy the body".

1) boat
2) 55 gallon drum
3) body in drum
4) drive boat out to ocean
5) Cement mix like you can buy at home depot
6) pour cement mix into drum with body
7) add water
8) seal drum
9) push into ocean
10) ?????
11) profit
#39
Quote by Gantz92
Feed it to TS mom.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2xUynRdzzsM
Quote by Obsceneairwaves
I once found a balloon filled with frosting that I ate....anyways I found out later on in life it was a used condom...




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#40
Quote by The_Casinator
ya we got some ****ed up people in the pit... lets just hope they don't rage and are stupid enough to actually do anything

I think that sense of humor and morbid curiosity can vary among different people or countries. The cannibal jokes are a hint that maybe humor is possibly involved somewhere.
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