#1
Hey all,

Finally got around to finishing my first massive track (coming in at just under 9 minutes) so I really want some comments on flow/songwriting of the track given the length.

I've tried to stop it from being bloated/random but there's a lot of Mars Volta influence in there with regards to experimental noise etc.

Was good fun doing a track of this length and I'd love to hear some feedback, C4C as always,

Cheers.

https://soundcloud.com/finlay-cable/fortress-of-keys
#2
Ok, to follow the first rule of good criticism, I'll start with something positive
I really like the sound and the vocals are very good, too. There's just a little bit more room, when the vocals get very high. The song, in general, is cool too, but - here comes the criticism - in my eyes it sometimes needs more structure; some changes are to abrupt. For instance, the intro does not really fit and it is a bit too long. If you want to keep the length, let it fade it, or something like that.
The next thing is and this is also a praise, this sounds so much like Mars Volta; could have been a bonus track of de-loused. But in my eyes you should be a little bit more independent with your writing.
And I also dig the lyrics. I love those cryptic, weird stuff.


It would be nice, if you listen to my stuff: peace is not a choice