#1
Hello People...

I have recently started writing again.... I tend to write Country type songs ( guitar and piano) No Judging !! ; ) but I am looking for some honest feedback-- friends say it is "good" but that is usually after I have plied them with dinner and liquor.

So here goes....


This is a Heart Breaking

The sun is setting
empty arms
without him aching
it’s lonely road
when you been taken for a ride
the promises he
never kept
your eyes fill with the
tears he never wept
You've been played
and the only prize you got
Was a scar

Chrous

This is a heart breaking
whatever is left
is here for the taking
even if there’s nothing
left to give
This is a heart breaking
There’s nothing left to lose
but even an empty box
has a use
The sun’s gonna rise
like a half-broke pony
You realize
maybe there’s a little
fight left

This sense of being shattered
as if you really mattered
makes sense
once you understand the game
you’re not to blame
the only thing you went looking for
was love

The shards of glass
You pick from this broken memory
As if there was something
left to save
You know this was a hit and run
He dazzled you like the sun
you forgot to take his name
#2
Well to me, the lyrics are good, but I'm not sure about the song structure? is it supposed to be quite short and does it only have 1 chorus? Obviously as I don't listen to country music I have no idea what this would actually sound like or if this is a common song structure
But I gotta say, in my opinion lyrics are really dependant on the music. I've listened to many bands that sound awesome, so I automatically think the lyrics are good, but when you look closer, they seem crap (and vice versa). But this doesn't stop me listening to them :P A whole lot of it is to do with melody (captain obvious).
do you mind checking out my thread and giving me some feedback? would really appreciate it
#3
Music is subjective-- short or long songs... I am working on the "hook" but this is the basic structure// Verse, Chours Verse I have learned that a song pretty much writes itself.. I will be recording this with a friend in the next month - hopefully it will sound good. Thanks for your time in answering.
#4
Hi there! I've experienced your lyrics. Didn't really plan on reliving that tonight. LOL! Well done!