#1
My first time writing some lyrics, didn't pay too much attention to song structure. Don't be too harsh
and they're both influenced by TOOL, so when you read them out think of a somewhat heavy sounding song. With soft vocals, but some shouts/screams (like when it says 'and I', you can read it as 'AAAAND IIIII')
Anyway I'll get to it, and congrats if you can be bothered reading the whole thing.

lyrics no. 1:

Void of love or compassion
I'll say I hate you but
I
just
can't
share this deep passion
with you

Cold yet full of life
the blood runs thick
but you're not quite alive
Deep inside me I promise it's there
the shallow current locks it up
and I
just
can't
tell you yet

The closer that you come
I just
can't
The shadow that I keep will
bring me down
bring me down

Hurt me some more I feel safe
And turn me down
Impossible to bring myself to say
what's on your mind
what's on my mind
Deep inside I promise it's there
the shallow current locks it up
and makes me
deaf

There must be an exit
from this ****ed up little game
These feelings of affection
won't bring me down
Keep your distance
because right now I'm so foul
and I
just
can't relate

The closer that you come
I just
can't
The shadow that I keep will
bring me down
bring me down
The closer that you come
I just
can't
The shadow that I keep will
bring me down
bring me up
take me down
take me down

Comfort my tragedy
let me detach
from this body
this head
this mind
The shadow that prevails
will take me down
take me down
Just let me drift away
and detach myself
from this body
this head this mind
this body
this head this mind
my body
my head
my mind
It's all inside of me

The closer that you come
I just
can't
The shadow that I keep will
bring me down
bring me down
The closer that you come
I just
can't
The shadow that I keep will
bring me down
bring me up
take me down
take me down
take me down
either way I'm ****ed

lyrics no. 2:

Come to seek the pleasures
Show me there's no measures
Yet with every step I take
You're pushing me closer to the break
Come to haunt my every thought
Show me there's no other way

Because
I want it
I want it now
I'm ll wrongly wired up
come and take me off this hook

Deep within
the vicinity
of my own mind
I feel the displeasure
growing stronger
glowing dimmer

Help me achieve the pleasures
Take no other meausres
As with every look I take
You're throwing me right over the edge


Because
I want it
I want it now
I want it
I want it now
I'm all wrongly wired up
Please just help me throw this habit
Because
I want it
I want it now
I'm all wrongly wired up
Please just take me off this hook

**** my incompetence
**** the consequences
Try and keep me
in my senses
Realise the hunger
of the stimulus
reward me for
my sinful deeds
Praise me for
my useless seeds
I'm just wrongly wired up
relieve this urge
throw me a noose

Because
I want it now
THere's no means of time
I want it now
There's just no other way
I need it now
No consideration
of mine
Give it now
Rewire me
and kill this
****ed up freak

Okay that's it. Now go ahead, laugh your asses off
#5
Quote by Cavalcade
Yeah, really, this does kind of sound like Tool. I can't really say much other than that, but on the surface, this is a good imitation of Maynard's lyrical style.


thanks a lot. That's kinda what I was aiming for
#8
Hey thanks guys I was expecting somewhat less positive feedback for my first time.. but awesome I might try and write some more.