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#1
So, as of three months ago, I was a mormon (LDS) missionary.

Anybody want to ask me a question?
Quote by bass-boy-garith
Quote by guitarhero_764
I guess I'm kind of like a hippie. I'm anti-war, do drugs, and like communism.
Your not a hippie, just a ****ing moron.
#2
why would you want people to ask you questions?....

If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#3
...that is a good question. What was I thinking?
Quote by bass-boy-garith
Quote by guitarhero_764
I guess I'm kind of like a hippie. I'm anti-war, do drugs, and like communism.
Your not a hippie, just a ****ing moron.
#4
If you had to choose between fucking a sheep or your mum, which would you choose?
Quote by lambofgod127
btw im in hs and im almost 18 so if u do think she was flirting with me dont say that its wrong im almost a grown man.




༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽ WE ARE ROB ༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽
Last edited by slash_GNR666 at Nov 21, 2013,
#6
Quote by Tag43
How did the missionary thing go?

Quite well. I met a lot of people, and made a lot of friends, and became fluent in portuguese (I served in northeast Brazil). There is a lot more to gain than lose I suppose.
Quote by bass-boy-garith
Quote by guitarhero_764
I guess I'm kind of like a hippie. I'm anti-war, do drugs, and like communism.
Your not a hippie, just a ****ing moron.
#7
how long did it take to become fluent in Portuguese? what was Brazil like? what kind of conditions did you live in? what was the food like? did you meet anyone you didnt like? how many liters of urine would you say you passed in Brazil? how did you travel in Brazil (car? bicycle? scooter? moped?) how did you travel into/out of the country? what was it like crossing the border(s)?
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#9
Quote by Harvey Swick
how long did it take to become fluent in Portuguese? what was Brazil like? what kind of conditions did you live in? what was the food like? did you meet anyone you didnt like? how many liters of urine would you say you passed in Brazil? how did you travel in Brazil (car? bicycle? scooter? moped?) how did you travel into/out of the country? what was it like crossing the border(s)?

Thats more like it!

It took me about 6 months (two of which were in a classroom, studying only portuguese for six hours a day, six days a week)

Brazil is still devloping in the northeast, so there are nicer parts, and a lot of ghettos and third world conditions outside of big cities. They are still devloping good infrastructure, and some people still suffer hunger and thirst. But overall, a really nice place to live depending on the region.

Rice and beans. Every day. Literally EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.

I met quite a few, but they were far outnumbered by people I did like. In general rich people are pricks.

Liters of urine? Buckets of them. Its all about getting buckets.

I had to walk, but most people use the bus/metro. Cars are relatively expensive.

I flew. Coming in, i had to wait a month for my visa to clear (it took about seven months total). Other than that, customs going into brazil are easy to pass if you dont have many electronics. The united states had a lot more regulations than Brazil.
Quote by bass-boy-garith
Quote by guitarhero_764
I guess I'm kind of like a hippie. I'm anti-war, do drugs, and like communism.
Your not a hippie, just a ****ing moron.
#10
Quote by Amuro Jay
Hey, a friend of mine went to Utah to become a Mormon missionary. Is there like one central place they do it or are there lots of places? You ever run into a Texan guy named Sam? He went to Utah over two years ago.

There is a place called the Missionary Training Center (MTC for short) where at any given time there are about 3,000 prospective missionaries in a three or six week training period (if you are learning a language, you will stay the six). I was in Utah from september to october 2011, then I went to Sao Paulo. I don't think I met anyone from Texas while I was in Utah.

Edit: there are about 20 of these training centers worldwide, but only the utah one has more than 500 missionaries at a time.
Quote by bass-boy-garith
Quote by guitarhero_764
I guess I'm kind of like a hippie. I'm anti-war, do drugs, and like communism.
Your not a hippie, just a ****ing moron.
Last edited by cukd7x-a2- at Nov 21, 2013,
#11
so you're a mormon

whats up with that
Quote by korinaflyingv
On the come up we were listening to Grateful Dead and the music started passing through my bowel and out my arsehole as this violet stream of light. I shat music. It was beautiful.
#12
Quote by Burgery
so you're a mormon

whats up with that



thanks for posting what we were all thinking.
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

Proud to be called Best Friends with Pastafarian96
#14
Quote by Burgery
so you're a mormon

whats up with that

lol iknorite? It fits me well, but not everyone agrees. I had to accept that a lot.
Quote by bass-boy-garith
Quote by guitarhero_764
I guess I'm kind of like a hippie. I'm anti-war, do drugs, and like communism.
Your not a hippie, just a ****ing moron.
#15
Are you telling people unfamiliar with Christianity about Christianity and Mormonism, or talking to other Christians about Mormomism.
^^The above is a Cryptic Metaphor^^


"To know the truth of history is to realize its ultimate myth and its inevitable ambiguity." Everything is made up and the facts don't matter.


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#16
IDK what's going on but I'll ask the obvious question: Why did you decide to become a missionary?

And as a follow up, did you ever regret that decision?
#17
dum dum dum dum dummmm
Quote by Night
wtf is a selfie? is that like, touching yourself or something?
#19
Are the golden plates real and is Nicholas Cage on the case?
Most of the important things


in the world have been accomplished


by people who have kept on


trying when there seemed to be no hope at all
#20
I did both. I talked to mostly Christians (there is a big catholic tradition in brazil) but I met a few atheists.
As for my choice, it was always something I had planned on doing, but when I was about 17 or 18, I felt like it was something i should do. I don'tr egret nor do I think I ever will.

Smartsmartsmartsmartsmart
Quote by bass-boy-garith
Quote by guitarhero_764
I guess I'm kind of like a hippie. I'm anti-war, do drugs, and like communism.
Your not a hippie, just a ****ing moron.
#21
Quote by Nelshizzle
Are the golden plates real and is Nicholas Cage on the case?

Yes and yes. He is waiting for permission to exhume Joseph Smiths body to see if he has a map tattooed on his back.
Quote by bass-boy-garith
Quote by guitarhero_764
I guess I'm kind of like a hippie. I'm anti-war, do drugs, and like communism.
Your not a hippie, just a ****ing moron.
#22
Quote by korinaflyingv
On the come up we were listening to Grateful Dead and the music started passing through my bowel and out my arsehole as this violet stream of light. I shat music. It was beautiful.
#23
Quote by Burgery

Please tell me those are the al-queda missionaries!
Quote by bass-boy-garith
Quote by guitarhero_764
I guess I'm kind of like a hippie. I'm anti-war, do drugs, and like communism.
Your not a hippie, just a ****ing moron.
#25
Quote by cukd7x-a2-
Yes and yes. He is waiting for permission to exhume Joseph Smiths body to see if he has a map tattooed on his back.

This is kinda why some people find it hard to take you guys seriously.
That and the whole God thing.
But boys will be boys and girls have those eyes
that'll cut you to ribbons, sometimes
and all you can do is just wait by the moon
and bleed if it's what she says you ought to do
#26
Whats it like to wear that magical underwear in a hot climate? Were your balls swimming in brine?
#27
Quote by Hydra150
This is kinda why some people find it hard to take you guys seriously.
That and the whole God thing.

Why? Because we can take a joke?
Quote by bass-boy-garith
Quote by guitarhero_764
I guess I'm kind of like a hippie. I'm anti-war, do drugs, and like communism.
Your not a hippie, just a ****ing moron.
#28
How do you feel about South Park?
I NEED TO CHANGE MY USERNAME


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#29
Quote by cukd7x-a2-
So, as of three months ago, I was a mormon (LDS) missionary.

Anybody want to ask me a question?


You say you 'was' a Mormon which obviously implies that you no longer are a Mormon. So I suppose the obvious question would be to ask what caused you to stop being a Mormon?
#30
Quote by SlackerBabbath
You say you 'was' a Mormon which obviously implies that you no longer are a Mormon. So I suppose the obvious question would be to ask what caused you to stop being a Mormon?

I think it's more that he was a missionary and has since stopped doing missionary work, surely?
#31
Quote by willT08
I think it's more that he was a missionary and has since stopped doing missionary work, surely?

Hmmm, I suppose that could be implied... but it'd be bad grammar.

If he's still a Mormon, I suppose the obvious question would be to ask him if Joseph Smith's historical track record as, first, a con man and a fraud who ran the well known 'peep stone' con, then his being sued for "running an illegal bank," and the suspicion of him embezzling the $100,000 that went missing after just one month of the bank being open for business, then his illegal destroying of the presses of the Nauvoo Expositor and his threating of people who criticised him with his own militia force has ever affected his faith in Smith as a good man?

Also, what does he think about Smith's first (and only legal) wife Emma's views on polygamy and the way she was forced into a polygamous marriage, obviously against her wishes?

This is what she said about polygamy.
"We raise our voices and hands against John C. Bennett's 'spiritual wife system', as a scheme of profligates to seduce women; and they that harp upon it, wish to make it popular for the convenience of their own cupidity; wherefore, while the marriage bed, undefiled is honorable, let polygamy, bigamy, fornication, adultery, and prostitution, be frowned out of the hearts of honest men to drop in the gulf of fallen nature"

So, his own wife saw it simply as an adulterous way to seduce other women. For the rest of her life and even on her deathbed, even though we know differently, she continualy denied that her husband had plural wives. Sounds to me like she had a pretty hard time accepting her husbands polygamy.
Last edited by SlackerBabbath at Nov 21, 2013,
#32
Maybe now that you're home you should learn real portuguese, instead of that silly variation they speak in Brazil.
#35
oh shit son
dirtbag ballet by the bins down the alley
as i walk through the chalet of the shadow of death
everything that you've come to expect


#36
Quote by cukd7x-a2-
Why? Because we can take a joke?

More that the whole golden plates/Joseph Smith being a con-man stuff makes you guys look like a joke.

But whatever, live and let live. Just don't chap on my door or try indocrinate my kids
But boys will be boys and girls have those eyes
that'll cut you to ribbons, sometimes
and all you can do is just wait by the moon
and bleed if it's what she says you ought to do
#37
Quote by cukd7x-a2-
Quite well. I met a lot of people, and made a lot of friends, and became fluent in portuguese (I served in northeast Brazil). There is a lot more to gain than lose I suppose.


Living in Brazil, did you ever attend the Miss Bum Bum Contest? Do you have pics?

If not, you wasted your time and now you're wasting ours.

Thanks, and God Bless.
#38
i see that mormon polygamy is now disallowed. if i were to join, are there ways to get around this?
Quote by archerygenious
Jesus Christ since when is the Pit a ****ing courtroom...

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