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#1
RANT


I don't normally do this but I felt inclined to bitch tonight so here it is.

Long story short, I've finished/am finishing quite a few recording projects (for fun/personal satisfaction, not money) and 90% of these have been done with people online/long distance by means of just sending each other midi/WAV's and so forth.

I seem to be in a definite minority here as far as being one of the ONLY people who really just wants to record and not play live.

Now granted I've been in a band before, many many years ago and have since collaborated with guitar guys/bassists in real life (I'm a vocalist, lyricist, midi drum/synth programmer). However the biggest reason I took to the great vast internet was because EVERY LAST PERSON in ****ing real life wanted 90% of the time to be in a band/play covers making small amounts of money in bars and meanwhile only wanted to really record about 10% of the time. Needless to say I did not keep in contact with these individuals and vice versa.

Now maybe I'm just a curmudgeonly old dick trapped in a young guy's body but I just don't give a shit about a band. I know this might sound blasphemous to some but as far back as I can remember I've always enjoyed just listening to recorded music on my own as opposed to going to shows. Weird I know but that's just how it's been.

Now shows can be a lot of fun don't get me wrong and so can local bars/bar restaurants where bands play covers. I also have a great amount of respect for the dedication bands have (especially these days) keeping it together knowing that they'll never become "rock stars" or any of that idealist pre-internet shit. Rather, doing it because they genuinely love playing and entertaining people.

I suppose what I just don't get is the absolute OBSESSION with playing in some kid's dad's garage or not playing at all. A lot of these people won't even jam with you again if you haven't made it clear that you want some kind of band. It's like, why even record then? If you're just planning on playing other people's stuff all the time why bother?

It's not my age either because I know a few guys in their 20's and some even over 30 who are still obsessed with the band stuff much like they were in high school. The only differences are that they're infinitely better as far as skill goes now and they have to work/have lives outside of that so they do it rather little compared to before.

Also everyone thinks being in a band is the greatest coolest ****ing thing ever but what about all the negatives?

Yes the positives being you get to do what you love (if you love playing live/maybe SOME originals once in a while), entertain people, become a small time bar celebrity in your area (which can be cool for meeting new friends, girls, whatever) but man the negatives.

How about assholes who bring their little butthole girlfriends or boyfriends around to practice NONSTOP to show off their temporary little "love" that will supposedly burn like an eternal flame? Even though the shit ends in 4 months and they bring the wreckage of that into the band. How about pothead assholes who can NOT for the life of them stop ****ing toking/smoking for more than 5 consecutive minutes without losing focus yet again? How about pillhead assholes who think they're so unique and special because they have oxys brooo? How about having to take all the time, gasoline and effort to continually drive to someone's house (with all your stuff loaded) while you very well may not even feel like going over there? Especially if someone you don't like lives there or frequently visits?

And how about listening to people's gay little problems, many of which would have otherwise nothing to do with the band had they not brought it up? Why should I have to hear about how my bassist doesn't feel validated as an existential being? Or how so and so was molested so they wrote this emotional song about it?

OH and competing schedules, constant lineup changes and knowing that you'll have some drunk bro asshead yell, "Play that Journey song again bro!" from the side of the stage for the 5,000th time? Not to mention a lot of these douches even lose interest in keeping the very band they started no matter what. "Uh yeah bro was gonna' ****in' keep the band man but y'know, work, X-Box and ass got in the way bro. O and I had to feed my cat bro."

I'm sure no one will even care to read or respond to this, short of trolling me, but if someone does I'd love to hear their synopsis on this. Even the trolling is welcome so long as it pertains to what I'm bitching about.

And yes, there are flake a-holes in real life and on the internet, I've dealt with both but MAN if you don't want a band and don't want to make money off playing other people's music the flake ratio shoots up to like 90% in real life.

Anyone else jaded with bands or dealt with this? I know I sound like Malcolm from Malcolm In The Middle with this ****ing dissertation but doesn't it just seem like most humans at the core of it, aside from enjoying playing organically with others, only really want to be in a band these days for the social validation they get from it? Meanwhile my nigguh Grom The Caveman is chilling in his cave w/ Ableton recording with dudes from Venezuela and Russia making better-sounding music than the new little crop of 14 year old shits whose parents bought them Gibsons when they can barely play.


Ok, I got to pms. Feel free to troll me now
#2
That's way too much text for me to read through to ultimately not care about anyway.
Check out my band Disturbed
#4
I agree, TS.
Quote by jrcsgtpeppers

If women can be annoyed there arent any women incongress I should be allowed to be pissed off there are no members of pink floyd or the beatles in congress.
#6
Read the first paragraph or so. It was a little interesting, so might actually read later, but no time right now.
THE FORUM UPDATE KILLED THE GRADIENT STAR

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#7
Holy shit this is longer than the bible.

...modes and scales are still useless.


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#8
I'm going to read all of this. Hold on.
*-)
Quote by Bob_Sacamano
i kinda wish we all had a penis and vagina instead of buttholes

i mean no offense to buttholes and poop or anything

Rest in Peace, Troy Davis and Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis and Eric Garner and Mike Brown
#9
Quote by lolmnt
I'm going to read all of this. Hold on.
I did.

All you had to do was say "I am a miserable person."
*-)
Quote by Bob_Sacamano
i kinda wish we all had a penis and vagina instead of buttholes

i mean no offense to buttholes and poop or anything

Rest in Peace, Troy Davis and Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis and Eric Garner and Mike Brown
#11
LOL!

Reeeding b hard!

Ok, I'll summarize my biblical epic:

Recording = Good

Band = Gay

#12
middle school is rough, your body is going through changes but it's normal.

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jthm_guitarist
Warned for trolling!


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Didn't you say that you had a stuffed fox that you would occasionally fuck?

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#13
Quote by jthm_guitarist
middle school is rough, your body is going through changes but it's normal.

Everybody poops.
#14
I feel similarly.

I'm in a band, and do enjoy playing live, but everyone (one guy in particular) always wants to jam every week and we don't really accomplish anything and it's becoming a bother.

I find it more rewarding to sit and make tangible music on my computer, which only one other guy in the band is capable of, so all of the other two's musical/creative satisfaction is entirely derived from us playing together for nobody.
#15
Quote by glass_satellite
I feel similarly.

I'm in a band, and do enjoy playing live, but everyone (one guy in particular) always wants to jam every week and we don't really accomplish anything and it's becoming a bother.

I find it more rewarding to sit and make tangible music on my computer, which only one other guy in the band is capable of, so all of the other two's musical/creative satisfaction is entirely derived from us playing together for nobody.

To Glass_Satellite, thanks for being one of the only intelligible responses to this and for actually having read and at least partially understood where I was coming from.

I'm still convinced that a lot of the band shit has to do with it being so social and people tend to really like that. It would also explain why as decades pass bands tend to be less and less important to people overall. They get jobs, become boring little married a-holes, have 2.5 kids a 401 k and all that shit so BAM there's their social validation. No need for that "juvenile" band stuff anymore. I think that attitude is pretty ****ed personally but humans will "sell out" in a variety of ways rather quickly.

I hear you in that sometimes people just like playing together which is cool too but in my experience 98% of the time they always end up wanting to play bars and you have to do covers to be successful there. That's IF they want to take it further than just hanging, making originals.

I'm not shit talking bands period mind you but rather shit talking the idea of me being in one for the reasons I listed.
#17
Sounds like you just haven't found the band that suits you yet. I'd say the most important thing in a band is that everyone get along well. My bandmates are some of my best friends really. Sometimes we have some arguments about stuff but it's ok as we always end up finding a solution. Then everyone in the band should pretty much have the same objective. Jam? Play covers? Play original? what style do you want to do? Recordings? When are the practice? I'm not saying everyone in the band should think exactly the same way but you gotta find an agreement that suits everyone in the long run. Think about it carefully before you get in a band with anyone. If something pisses you off right away, it might not work in the long run. Communication is also extremely important for all the reasons I've mentioned sooner.

There are a ton of factor that could **** a band up. Actually I feel very lucky that I've done shows (because that's what we like to do), some smaller and some pretty decent, with some of my best friends.
Quote by DarkLiquor
I like you. Compassionate and strong. Glad theres people like you.

"What is the best kind of slave to have? One who does not realize they are a slave"
Wake up people!
Last edited by shelovemyguitar at Nov 22, 2013,
#18
Quote by shelovemyguitar
Sounds like you just haven't found the band that suits you yet. I'd say the most important thing in a band is that everyone get along well. My bandmates are some of my best friends really. Sometimes we have some arguments about stuff but it's ok as we always end up finding a solution. Then everyone in the band should pretty much have the same objective. Jam? Play covers? Play original? what style do you want to do? Recordings? When are the practice? I'm not saying everyone in the band should think exactly the same way but you gotta find an agreement that suits everyone in the long run. Think about it carefully before you get in a band with anyone. If something pisses you off right away, it might not work in the long run. Communication is also extremely important for all the reasons I've mentioned sooner.

There are a ton of factor that could **** a band up. Actually I feel very lucky that I've done shows (because that's what we like to do), some smaller and some pretty decent, with some of my best friends.

You make some good points too and yes you are lucky to have had your best friends also be your band mates. I only had 1 "best friend" like that who was also my main guitar guy but he became Mr. Married Workaholic Asshole who was too good to make music anymore because his piece of shit gf (who had the face of a gnome lol) didn't like him doing that.

On the flip side though I can recall these redneck dudes that I used to hang with and work with when I was like 17 who were bad ass. They were all married, had jobs and all that but STILL made time to keep playing music. It's a shame I lost touch w those guys. Ironic that rednecks would be the higher caliber of people compared to what I've dealt with.

No doubt everyone's experiences will vary somewhat and obviously I'm a bit biased here due to my experiences but yeah. In the end you have to genuinely love it to keep doing it and I love recording music/giving copies to people I know irl and online but I do not "love" performing it.
#19
too long for me as well, but...i also really just want to record
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#20
Quote by RevileN
You make some good points too and yes you are lucky to have had your best friends also be your band mates. I only had 1 "best friend" like that who was also my main guitar guy but he became Mr. Married Workaholic Asshole who was too good to make music anymore because his piece of shit gf (who had the face of a gnome lol) didn't like him doing that.

Your friend isn't an asshole, he just can't take his place in his couple and maybe he's just changed his priorities. People change you know. Looks like his wife is trying too hard to control him but that or the fact that he isn't taking his place, that's some problems they have to solve. We all have problems we have to solve in order to become better human beings. Do what I do: live and let live...
Quote by DarkLiquor
I like you. Compassionate and strong. Glad theres people like you.

"What is the best kind of slave to have? One who does not realize they are a slave"
Wake up people!
#21
But what about Recording with a band? I would like to be in a band just to have people to jam and write songs with. I don't know that I'd be very good at the live thing but who knows, once I get used to it it could be fun.
#23
I like that idea honestly. I mean not a full band in my case but w/ a few guys yeah. I have a guitarist buddy of mine I do that with in real life from time to time and it's a cool mix of organic/real life and electronic/internet. More people should probably do that.

My bitching was mostly directed at the "We are a serious or wannabe serious local band who will play shows all the time, practice all the time, and make some measly bucks off of covers because that is just what we will do. We will also be popular and gain much social validation from this and anyone who doesn't do this we cannot take seriously as a musician." Again I respect their work ethic and sometimes their talent but my value systems musically are totally inconsistent w/ that.

Btw, if given shitloads of money people would play with damn near anyone. Hitler could be the bassist and they'd be like, "Well bro I don't really like his politics but it's about the music bro." How do you think that anus Ulrich still has band mates? XD
#24
Quote by MakinLattes
I feel like you're a character in a really preachy movie that I wouldn't watch.

I should become a preacher then

Then people could throw rotten tomatoes at me while I tell them "Repent or burn!"
#25
Quote by RevileN

Btw, if given shitloads of money people would play with damn near anyone. Hitler could be the bassist and they'd be like, "Well bro I don't really like his politics but it's about the money bro." How do you think that anus Ulrich still has band mates? XD

ftfy

And Ulrich still has band mates because Metallica wouldn't be Metallica without him, and believe it or not, some people like him. I'm in no way a fan of Metallica or Ulrich btw, far from it actually
Quote by DarkLiquor
I like you. Compassionate and strong. Glad theres people like you.

"What is the best kind of slave to have? One who does not realize they are a slave"
Wake up people!
#26
You mad, bro?

In response to the little bit I read before noticing how long this was, I too am only interested in recording. Actually maintaining a band requires time and money that I don't have, so you're kind of screwed if you don't get lucky and make it somewhere.
#27
the experience of live music is something that cannot be replicated by just listening to recordings. i dont know why someone wouldnt want to play out.

TBH i kind of glanced over your 19,000 word essay. I might have missed the point.
#28
I'm gunna give you a little advice. Genuine. Get out of the mom/dad bar scene and find your local independent music scene.
*-)
Quote by Bob_Sacamano
i kinda wish we all had a penis and vagina instead of buttholes

i mean no offense to buttholes and poop or anything

Rest in Peace, Troy Davis and Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis and Eric Garner and Mike Brown
#29
I actually really enjoy performing, which is why I want to be in a band and stuff. But I don't do covers really, in my old band we only played one or two covers, the rest were all my originals. The band I'm in now has like 2 covers out of about two hours worth or material, but I'm mostly just a stage musician, I didn't write any of it. I also really love creating new music with people, thats probably my favorite thing to do out of everything I do with my life. When you're jamming and you come up with something really great, and you get that interaction between two or three people, thats what I really love.

I definitely see your point though, a lot of guys in bands have stupid attitudes about it, and you can have shitty experiences working with people. My old band was with my best friends, so we got along well, though we did have ego issues because we were dumb highschoolers. I want to get that band back together after college. The guys I'm with now are pretty close, but we don't hang out or anything outside of the band. I would like to do more recording stuff, but I'm not very good at it yet.
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3 ram, nice

#30
I left the band I recently started, because I wasn't really feeling the whole vibe and direction they wanted to go. I'm more of a recording/studio musician more than the I-only-live-for-my-band kind of artist. I agree with a lot with the OP, but i'd much rather play live with my solo material than with a band. 95% of my music life is recordings, even if i'm not exactly great at what I do. I like to have fun.

I have experienced all of the band-cons listed though. It gets extremely irritating after a while. I also favor recording solo over with a band. It has it's ups and downs.
#31
God forbid, someone needs to get a job to support themselves. Or they get married, or have kids. Nice blog mate, but why are these wrong?
#32
Quote by Malchius
God forbid, someone needs to get a job to support themselves. Or they get married, or have kids. Nice blog mate, but why are these wrong?


You're misinterpreting what I said or perhaps I didn't say it well enough. My mistake.

I'm actually very happy that the record monarchy as it existed for about half a century finally collapsed with the proliferation of the internet. The shitty part is that hardly anyone can make any money off their recordings at all anymore (shitloads of piracy/just too much music out there to choose from for people to really care about buying) but the good part is that to get your music heard and shared with people all around the world is simple. The other benefit (at least I think) is that no longer can someone be a very talented but white trash pothead pillhead moron who just so happens to be really good at guitar or bass, be in the right place/right time in LA AND BAM make 10's of millions of dollars many years later just for those chance encounters he first stumbled upon.

Thus people HAVE to work/be a more useful part of society as far as paying regular taxes, working a real job, etc. They can't just shoot heroin on their yachts with hot strippers in thongs everywhere lol.

So I support people with day jobs who do music as a hobby or on the side for money too. I'm even one of them. As far as the marriage/kids thing, I have known guys who did this yet didn't "sell out" who they were because they became slaves to their wives' nether regions/kids' soccer practice but there are an awful lot who do. Compare how important making/playing music is for the vast majority of people from ages 16-21 to when they're 26-31 or heaven forbid 46-51. See the drop off here? In time, level of "social acceptability" (which a lot of people care about), etc.

I'm just saying that the reason a lot of the "flakes" who went through a "phase" playing music could have and do in fact end up getting that same social validation from other sources anyway so **** it. Might as well just try to be a CPA at 18 who listens to Michael Bolton instead of wasting money on a guit. imagining playing thrash or classic metal in biker bars.

Now a CPA who still plays Priest at night because he still loves it has my respect. The one who gave up the instrument totally because his wife didn't like him playing it (like an a*s*shole ex best friend of mine) doesn't. See the diff?
#33
This would have been a much better story if it was about Ali Baba and his Band of Thieves. I didn't even read the story; I just know that it would be better that way.
There's no such thing; there never was. Where I am going you cannot follow me now.
#34
I think this thread can be summed up with this.



I get where you're coming from, but you have to face that people move on and that jobs, women, children etc get in the way of things you enjoy doing.
Last edited by Malchius at Nov 22, 2013,
#35
If you let them then yes and to a certain extent no matter what yes but again you have some control as to your own priorities.
#38
Eh, I enjoyed reading the post. Took me back to similar issues I've had with previous bands. Dealing with uncreative, self-indulgent smokers in a band is a nightmare. "Hey let's take a smoke break every 5 minutes and talk about how good I am without even knowing the concept of quarter notes."
We're all alright!
#39
wiener alert.
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