#1
This is a first draft. My significant other dropped me, and it was for another guy, someone she promised she had no interest in so many times.

I was dead inside the last few days, but I needed to be mature, it's not in me to be a jerk when I can avoid it.

I congratulated him and was mature about it, but had to cut her off. I did this, but inside I want to hurt her so badly, but I can't do it. I feel selfish for my comparison of holding the world and my real situation, but I needed to get it out somewhere.


I know you love acoustic.
I know you don't love me.
I know that I suck
But why did you give up?

You know how bad you hurt me
You know I can't hurt you back
You know that I suck
But why can't I do what I want?

The world seems heavy on my shoulders
But I'm not Atlus, and you're no god

I know you love acoustic.
So that's why I'm about to kick it up.

My responsibilities, were all inside of you
When I signed up for you, I never agreed to this
To be a sucker, to get punched so hard
Putting the world onto me, for myself to hold

Dropping the world, dropping responsibility.
Into this pit, do you have morality?

My responsibilities, their gone now
When I signed up for you, I got a burden.
To be a sucker, to get punched so hard.
Putting the world on me, for me to throw

Dropping the world, dropping responsibility.
Into this pit, do you have morality?

And I know you love acoustic.
That's why this CD doesn't have one.
#2
I loved it man. Great job. As a fan of Greek mythology, I especially loved the line
"The world seems heavy on my shoulders
But I'm not Atlus, and you're no god"

Ps. I hope you feel better man.
#3
Sorry to hear about your situation brother. No one deserves to be a punching bag.

I love the title. I think you have some great imagery. I like that you're taking control of the situation, dropping her world into the pit. Now you're holding your world, you're moving forward. Seems like the song will have two very different halves. Who you were and who you will be now. Now you get to do what YOU want.

My only thoughts/ideas are about certain words that I feel could be altered to make your position stronger. I mean no disrespect. Please feel free disregard anything I say. Your song is your own.

For example - In the first verse, I kinda wish you used "I know you think I suck." Show that her opinion is her own. You shouldn't think that you suck. Especially if this is a cutting all ties song. You should be the one to come out on top. You're the one who is right.

Hope that helps. I don't want to dissect the whole thing. Good luck to you.
#4
Thanks for the feedback guys!
I usually go through dozens of drafts, and this was a spur of the moment lyric. I'll be using what you said to make it better.