#1
you were so quiet
and then you were so loud
you tore through my life
like a plane through a cloud

you splashed your paint on me
like i was your own colouring book
you decided what you liked and hated
then you tore the pages up

i told you 'sometimes mistakes make perfect art'
but you didn't believe me then
you just smiled - oh god, that ****ing smile
let me give my life to see it again
#2
The last line of the first stanza doesn't really work, in my opinion. The imagery is light and non-worrying, which doesn't really seem to make your point. Don't force a line just to make the rhyming work.

I like the other two stanzas. Overall, I like this, I just think it'd be better with some stronger imagery in the first stanza.

C4C? Links are in my sig.