#1
Some heavily Mastodon and Neurosis influenced progressive metal. Imagine Sanders/Kelly style vocals.

I think I composed some nice guitar harmonies and one of my personal best bass tracks. This isn't a complete song, I plan on making it longer and less repetitive.

Will crit for crit surely, if link is provided
Attachments:
riffinel.mid
riffinel.gp5
#2
Hi TK, this song has a nice prog vibe all over it, despite I'd liked some percussion, I can imagine a slow groove along the song. I'll decompose it in sections:

Intro: the intro kind of reminds me of Oblivion, so if you were going for a Mastodon feel, you succeeded
The B section adds some extra strenght and sets you up for the mood of the song, which is really nice.

Verse: this is one of my favorite parts, it could be pretty badass with vocals. The 3/4 signature at the D section adds some dimension to it and it doesn't get repetitive because of that.

Chorus: very dark and heavy, keeps up with the vibe of the song but adds some heaviness to it, love it.

Interlude: same as intro, I think it's well placed after the chorus, but maybe you could make it a little different by letting the strings ring here.

Instrumental sect (F): cool harmony, the only problem I have is that the riff gets a little repetitive here. Maybe you could place the harmony after the chorus and write a different riff for this part, or a solo (I know you're not too much into them ).

Outro: nothing new to say, I think the intro riff fits better here than on the instrumental section, but you said you were going to make it less repetitive, so my mouth will be shut lol.

This is pretty much it, don't have much more to say, I hope it helps and thanks for the review on my song!
#3
Thank you Nice criticism, yeah I plan on making a drum track, but tbh I'm not a drummer so it takes time Nice ideas on the instrumental section, I'll try some things out. You're welcome
#4
My favourite aspect of this is the way the bass part comes in and complements the main guitar riff.

Overall the melody was a bit jarring for me, but that's just my opinion. I also think the vibe would be improved if you added in the drums and vocals, to see how they would all fit together. Drum parts would really make this sound much more dynamic, where at the moment it just sort of chugs along. In the sections where it goes 0 0 3 0 0 4 0 0 3 0 0 2 etc, it might be a good idea to add in some octaves on a second guitar here and there, to make it more dramatic.

Just some thoughts. I don't know Neurosis though, so I might be way off.
#5
Neurosis' trademark is hypnotic and droning riffs, but point taken about the dynamics. Thanks for the input, appreciate it