Poll: Thread
Poll Options
View poll results: Thread
Divide candy evenly (2 per child)
14 31%
Divide candy such that both end up with same amount in end
20 44%
Some other option (explain)
11 24%
Voters: 45.
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#1
In front of you sits 2 children. One of them has a single piece of candy, and the other has no candy. In your hand, you hold 4 pieces of candy. You have to give your candy to the two kids.

Do you split the candy evenly? This would result in Child 1 ending up with 3 pieces of candy, while child 2 ends up with 2 pieces.

Or do you divide the candy in a way that both kids end up with the same amount? (You can cut a piece of candy into two)

Or some other option.

For the purposes of this crappy thread, assume that you have no mouth, so you can't eat the candy yourself you selfish bastard. Also assume that you have to give out all of the candy. And assume that you can only give candy to these 2 kids. And assume that you don't know these kids.

Which would you choose and why
ggg1 ggg3

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#2
This is just not a good thread. Is this like your Ethics homework or something?
There's no such thing; there never was. Where I am going you cannot follow me now.
#3
Tell the kid with 1 to split his in half and share with his friend and then I'll give him 2 more pieces. If he refuses or something then he's a little twat and I'll give all 4 pieces to his mate.
dirtbag ballet by the bins down the alley
as i walk through the chalet of the shadow of death
everything that you've come to expect


#4
Do they suck my dick before or after I give them the candy?


"Tell the kid with 1 to split his in half and share with his friend and then I'll give him 2 more pieces. If he refuses or something then he's a little twat and I'll give all 4 pieces to his mate" (Trowzaa, 2014).
Quote by Saint78
That's forever imprinted in my brain in Dwight's voice. Seriously.

Voted UG's best threadstarter 2014.
#5
Quote by theogonia777
This is just not a good thread. Is this like your Ethics homework or something?
sorry i shouldve made an ama thread
ggg1 ggg3

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#7
Is this communist obamas new law to give kids your fuccking candy when they sit in front of you?

You all have lost your way on how government handouts have ruined this beautiful country.

Also, divide, you have to make sure that you give out fair equal pieces, as long as you spit on them for assurance.
Most of the important things


in the world have been accomplished


by people who have kept on


trying when there seemed to be no hope at all
#9
Quote by Trowzaa
Tell the kid with 1 to split his in half and share with his friend and then I'll give him 2 more pieces. If he refuses or something then he's a little twat and I'll give all 4 pieces to his mate.
I like this response
ggg1 ggg3

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#10
Take candy from kid because he's just a kid and what's he gonna do about it, and shove candy up my ass to absorb it.

If I can't shove it up my ass then I'll dispense it to a river.
Last edited by metal4eva_22 at Apr 20, 2014,
#11
how come one kid already has candy? did someone else give them it? did both kids have candy already and one kid already at all theirs?


why can't I give them no candy? kids are too fat these days, I want to give them fruit instead, it's much better and more fun to eat. plus you can split fruit without it being weird.

yo **** your simplistic scenarios life is complicated and situational and can't be pigeon-holed into impractical rules of thumb. it's bullshit like this that let's the economists run amok with our markets with their short-sighted theories. it's people like you who are responsible for our economic downfall and our loss of money and pathetic financial stability, NO CANDY FOR ANYONE, WE CAN'T AFFORD IT.
O.K.

“There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want.”
~ Bill Watterson


O__o
#12
throw the candy on the ground and let them divide it themselves
but if kid 1 takes it all he gets punched in the face for being a fat asshole
¯\_()_/¯
#16
Quote by Nelshizzle
Is this communist obamas new law to give kids your fuccking candy when they sit in front of you?

You all have lost your way on how government handouts have ruined this beautiful country.

Damn straight! Those kids should have to work for their candy!


Have you checked their citizenship status?
Quote by Trowzaa
I wish I was American.

~ A Rolling Potato Gathers No Moss ~
#18
Quote by VillainousLatin
Can you tell me why do we need to answer this?

If I chose the wrong one does it means I'm a psychopath or some shit, is this one of th ose tests?

WTF man, why do I need to answer this?!
i want to know
ggg1 ggg3

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#19
lol I'm the only one who said to divide it evenly/2 per child

281-330-8004, that's my cell phone number, hit me up on the low
#20
Just give two to each. I'm not going to cut a damn piece of candy in half.
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LET'S GO BUCKS
#24
Quote by theguitarist
how come one kid already has candy? did someone else give them it? did both kids have candy already and one kid already at all theirs?

Yeah this is relevant. Why does one have more than the other anyway?
#26
Quote by Trowzaa
Tell the kid with 1 to split his in half and share with his friend and then I'll give him 2 more pieces. If he refuses or something then he's a little twat and I'll give all 4 pieces to his mate.

This man will make a good dad
You who build these altars now

To sacrifice these children
You must not do it anymore
#27
Are they girls or boys.
[img]http://i.imgur.com/LYZyCdp.gif[/img]


Quote by CrossBack7
Momie's like not even a real person, just an asian, lesbian spirit.
#29
2 to each, because even if currently the first kid has 1 candy more than his friend, I can't know whether the other just ate 10, or if the 1 candy first kid has is the only candy he had in his life before.
Not sure if a sig is a necessity.
#30
I'd split it evenly among them because the one with no candy already ate his last piece on the way to my house and I firmly believe in letting those little shits work it out by themselves, I've done my part.
#33
Keep cutting all the candy until their all sprinkle sized. Put them on top of ice cream. Crumble up oreos and put that shit on the ice cream. Drown it in chocolate syrup. Wish them good diabetes.
#34
I'd give 1 kid all the candy and tell him the other already ate the four pieces I gave to him.
#35
Make them go to a non functional website to purchase the candy at inflated prices and fine them if they don't do it in time.
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You should be careful what you say. Some asshole will probably sig it.

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I can fap to this. Keep going.
#36
This thread is just pedophile bait
There's only one boss I listen to, and that's why I'm unemployed.
#39
give each kid 2 pieces.

even if it was your job to make sure every kid got equal amounts of candy (which it's not), for all we know, the kid without a candy could've eaten his already, or he could've dropped it, or he could've shoved it up his ass. point is, all we see is that he has one less candy than the other kid, but we don't see why.
#40
Eat it and tell the kids to stop standing around begging for my candy and tell them to get a goddamn job and buy their own.

Also take kid #1's candy as payment for my wonderful advice.
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I put a ton of my capital into SW Airlines... The next day, THE NEXT DAY these nutters fly into the WTC. What the hell? Apparently no one wanted to fly anymore, and I was like "What gives? God damnit Osama, let me win a fuggin' game!"
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